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Living A Lie

Started by Julie Marie, July 22, 2009, 10:09:06 AM

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Julie Marie

Last night I saw the ABC Special about Chloe Prince, a man who transitioned to female. No biggie there but I wanted to see how ABC handled it.

During the show it was explained Ted (Chloe) was stung by a bee and because he was highly allergic ended up going to the emergency room. There they did a chromosome test and found Ted had Kleinfelter's syndrome. He then followed that up with a visit to an endocrinologist.

Shortly after the bee sting incident Ted began to notice his body was feminizing, the story goes. The host of the show said the bee sting had caused the Kleinfelter's to kick in and Ted's body began producing estrogen. Ted soon began to grow breasts and show typical signs of feminization (often seen in MTFs on HRT).

Of course, all of this is the stuff of ->-bleeped-<- fantasies. "Gee, I don't know what happened! A bee stung me and all of the sudden I turned into a woman!"  :o

What surprised me was ABC bought Chloe's story hook, line and sinker.  A simple research would have shown the bee sting story was so full of holes it was transparent. Ted had fathered two children without medical intervention. He had none of the physical traits often associated with Kleinfelter's. The symptoms could not have been dormant only to surface decades later from the bee sting. And Kleinfelter's causes a low testosterone production, not a high estrogen production.

Yet, here she was on national TV, allowing the story she told her wife (probably to make it seem she wasn't responsible for making the decision to transition) to be told to millions of viewers.

It reminded me of another woman who, while married, had FFS and told her wife she was going in for a face lift (even though she was too young to need one). Then she continued to deceive her wife with other stories that she thought were covering up the fact she was on HRT, etc. 

In both cases the wife was strung along by these women with the hopes they could preserve their marriage to their husbands, and that their husbands would remain their husbands, even if they looked a little different.

I can understand a CD spinning a few tales to avoid a confrontation because he will always remain he.  But if you are transsexual and, especially if you are in the transition process, you are living a lie if you keep that from your family.

Sorry for being so harsh but when I see the wives and kids living on false hope the trans person is selling them, my heart goes out for the unsuspecting and very trusting family members who are being deceived. 

If you are taking hormones, having feminizing surgeries or doing anything else to alter your appearance to the feminine because this is the way you want to live your life, how long do you think you can get away with it? Eventually it's going to come out and then your loved ones will discover how deceptive you've been and everything will be a lot worse. "Oh, what a tangled web we weave..."

I dabbled in hormones for a few months, but at that time there was no thoughts of transitioning. I later entered into therapy and there discovered I needed to do something. The time I first discussed HRT with the therapist I went home and told my wife. I owed her that. Whatever fallout there was I was prepared to accept it.  But there was no way I was going to start down the path of transition and not tell my family before I made the first step.

Okay, I'm done venting. I just hope anyone thinking of transitioning will be open and honest with their family before going down the path. It's the least you can do for them if you love them.

I'll step off the sop box now.

Julie
When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.
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NicholeW.

If we had the karma still in-place, J, I'd give you 5 for that post.

And then to be on national tv and continue with that cover-story. *sigh* People are simply stupid.

Wonder what she'll be telling her wife when she decides she's gonna find a boyfriend? Another bee-sting that made her uncontrollably desire a man? :laugh:
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finewine

Completely agree with you, Julie.  Spot on! 
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tekla

Another bee-sting that made her uncontrollably desire a man?

Knowing men I'd suspect a roach bite or rat bite.

Good writing Julie.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Mister

Excellent post.

While this story is clearly a fabrication, I find it more incredulous that she decided to go on national television with it.  Wouldn't she think someone would call her bluff?  HAS anyone (besides us) pointed out the very obvious absurdity of the story?
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Julie Marie

Quote from: Nichole on July 22, 2009, 10:14:24 AM
Wonder what she'll be telling her wife when she decides she's gonna find a boyfriend? Another bee-sting that made her uncontrollably desire a man? :laugh:

Oh, she didn't wait for that to happen. The host asked her if she was interested in men and she just glowed as she admitted an attraction to men. They even showed her out with men. But it didn't end there. They also showed a clip where she met up with an old flame (GG). She said, on national TV, she felt a renewed love for her and maybe if she married her instead of her wife she wouldn't have transitioned. Can you imagine how her wife felt after hearing that?

Now that's a real class act!

Maybe we should ask ABC to find someone with real morals and ethics and feature them.

Julie
When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.
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tekla

maybe if she married her instead of her wife she wouldn't have transitioned

No doubt the first girlfriend was made of bee repellent.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Mister

Wait... I thought she didn't transition and the magical bee fairy paid for SRS.
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Ellieka

Wow. That's just nuts. I hope some one breaks the news to ABC and to that ladies poor wife. When I read news stories like this it makes me cringe just to think that any halfway intelligent viewer could see the high level of bull excrement and would then judge the trans community as a whole based on that.

I can see it now:

Them: "So your a transsexual huh?"
me: "Yes, but I didn't choose to be this way"
Them: "Oh, so you got 'stung by a bee' too?"
Me: "No, I made the choice to transition but I did not choose to be transgendered."
Them: "Sure. whatever you say, dude."   

Post Merge: July 22, 2009, 10:43:41 AM

Quote from: tekla on July 22, 2009, 10:31:38 AM

No doubt the first girlfriend was made of bee repellent.
Quote from: Mister on July 22, 2009, 10:35:23 AM
Wait... I thought she didn't transition and the magical bee fairy paid for SRS.

:laugh: :laugh: You guys crack me up!
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NicholeW.

Quote from: Julie Marie on July 22, 2009, 10:27:36 AM

... Maybe we should ask ABC to find someone with real morals and ethics and feature them.

Julie


Somehow I can't see ABC doing the Diogenes bit with the lamp and all. :laugh:

And I honestly don't begrudge people their fifteen minutes of fame or getting their book ghost-written and published, but I think one should at the least tell something that's somewhat believable.

Hormonal cascades do occur, especially in the intersex side of things. I have no doubt for instance that Zoe Brain's story is absolutely true. And she's been backing that with references to what's been happening and how since a few months after it began at numerous message boards and in her blog. She's been incredibly open and proof-producing throughout.

But, yes, this does seem more than fortuitous and very loosely (charitably characterized) documented and backed.

As for her wife? I imagine that the she's been desperate to keep her family together and wants to believe with all her heart that Chloe's been above-board.

But, look at it this way. Depending on what the divorce laws are in Ohio, she should stay until all the contracts are signed and whatever money's gonna come in has come and make sure that most of it gets stoked away. Then the divorce. :) 

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Sandy

Hey!  Maybe we could breed bees that produce estrogen instead of honey!!!

And for the guys, we could breed wasps that sting testosterone!

I think I'm onto something here!  Let's see where did I put my genetic mutation tools...

-Sandy(ah, here they are...)
Out of the darkness, into the light.
Following my bliss.
I am complete...
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Mister

Quote from: Sandy on July 22, 2009, 11:19:15 AM
And for the guys, we could breed wasps that sting testosterone!

I prefer to call them 'syringes.'
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Kara

Quote from: Sandy on July 22, 2009, 11:19:15 AM
Hey!  Maybe we could breed bees that produce estrogen instead of honey!!!

And for the guys, we could breed wasps that sting testosterone!

I think I'm onto something here!  Let's see where did I put my genetic mutation tools...

-Sandy(ah, here they are...)

So sorry, I'm allergic to bee stings. They have a transformational effect on my genitalia.
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NicholeW.

Quote from: Mister on July 22, 2009, 11:24:43 AM
I prefer to call them 'syringes.'

Obviously we have the same sorts of insects here that you do there. :laugh:
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Zelane

ROFL, a lot of the comments are cracking me up :p

Anyway, strange things can and do happen. Just like someone pointed ZoeB's had one of those moments and was like: ups? But this bee thing its clearly a way to evade responsibility for transitioning (at least thats how it looks to me)

Im tired of seeing some persons that use the excuse of being intersex to justify things. And I will repeat my opinion: being intersex doesnt mean you will have gender issues. But if you have them then your body issues are just that.

Just think how outraged those persons who are XXY and have a MALE gender feel when reading that article. What if they are married? Their wifes will doubt they for sure (well could happens)

TS claiming to be IS its a problem (well an annoyance at least), because those that are really IS can get discriminated.
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ginger39

I don't know. I was definitely awaiting you folks take on this. The Klinefelter's/bee story is obviously a lie. The wife though, geez something is seriously wrong with that person. Plastic surgery isn't cheap. Where did she think the money came from? Also, the wife was complaining about their family struggling to get by but doesn't handle any of the finances and doesn't work? Baffling to me. This is the USA. Every family has 2, 3 and even 4 jobs to just get by. I know people who literally work 100 hours per week. She seems like the classic "victim" personality.

My mother does the same thing. Hates her abusive alcoholic husband but won't leave him for anything. Always complains that shes got no where to go. My wife cut her off the last time and flat out told her that not only did we have room for her but my grandmother did as well. No shortage of places to go. Same thing with this woman. Divorce him already. Get a job. Your husband transitioned to be a woman. She lied to you over and over. She is going to leave your for a man any day. No matter how much you allegedly love someone you can't live with someone who deceives you.
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NicholeW.

Quote from: Zelane on July 22, 2009, 12:18:56 PM



Im tired of seeing some persons that use the excuse of being intersex to justify things. And I will repeat my opinion: being intersex doesnt mean you will have gender issues. But if you have them then your body issues are just that.

Just think how outraged those persons who are XXY and have a MALE gender feel when reading that article. What if they are married? Their wifes will doubt they for sure (well could happens)

TS claiming to be IS its a problem (well an annoyance at least), because those that are really IS can get discriminated.

Annoyance indeed. And particularly with the swelling of the evidence that it IS a kinda of IS condition: brain IS, that is. But, it's an old and definite ploy. Some apparently feel/have felt bolsters something or other for them. To each his or her own I suppose.

But in the discrimination sweepstakes I believe that IS and TS each have enough on our plates to not be in competition. :)
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ginger39

Quote from: Julie Marie on July 22, 2009, 10:27:36 AM
Oh, she didn't wait for that to happen. The host asked her if she was interested in men and she just glowed as she admitted an attraction to men. They even showed her out with men. But it didn't end there. They also showed a clip where she met up with an old flame (GG). She said, on national TV, she felt a renewed love for her and maybe if she married her instead of her wife she wouldn't have transitioned. Can you imagine how her wife felt after hearing that?

Now that's a real class act!

Maybe we should ask ABC to find someone with real morals and ethics and feature them.

Julie


But that wouldn't be interesting and people couldn't sit in judgment and feel superior to us.

Post Merge: July 22, 2009, 01:26:23 PM

I wanna add that I was sympathetic to Chloe. I liked her especially when she talked about men. I don't think she is a lesbian any more than her wife is and I thought that she came across as someone who desperately wanted to get out of that marriage but didn't know how because of extreme guilt. I think she loves her kids and wants to be a mother figure in the worst way but is forced to continue with the male role in the family. At least with my wife she is smart enough to take advantage and I pretty much wind up doing all the laundry, housework, yardwork and cooking. Chloe's wife seemed to have other ideas. I think she needs to move on and marry someone else. We all know it isn't hard for decent looking women to attract men. I always find it perplexing why so many women have such low self esteem. Men are pretty much elated if any woman pays them any attention.
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Julie Marie

I'm not without having some compassion for Chloe but the way she went about this was pretty unethical, for lack of a better word. I understand the need to transition but you can do so in a better fashion.

When they divorce her wife will find she paid $35K for Chloe's transition. And it was Chloe's transition that ultimately will lead to divorce. Had Chloe divorced then transitioned she'd have borne all the costs of the surgery, which I think is the right thing to do.

And making up that bee sting story?  She should have just admitted she was trans and needed to do something about it. Maybe if she involved her wife in on the decision making process her wife would have handled things better.

I got the feeling Chloe was out to protect #1 first and foremost.  She used whatever she thought would work so she could get what she wanted. Even though she acted like she was concerned for and loved her family first.

This was not a good example of trans people to throw out there into TV land.

Julie
When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.
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Tammy Hope

Quote from: ginger39
Also, the wife was complaining about their family struggling to get by but doesn't handle any of the finances and doesn't work? Baffling to me. This is the USA. Every family has 2, 3 and even 4 jobs to just get by. I know people who literally work 100 hours per week. She seems like the classic "victim" personality.

That's not necessarily true. People have different priorities and some families choose a lower standard of living in order to do things differently. It's not CLOSe to true that every family has at least two jobs.

And as for the story at hand, Rene was woeking until last December when she was laid off according to the blog.

Still doesn't explain where $70K came from but apparently there were two jobs while all that spending was going on.




I think Cami made a good but mostly unnoticed point here. And to expand on it, what I see happening is that the Right Wing crowd who opposes expanding protected classes to include TGs are going to do the leg work, and write up an "expose'" debunking the Bee story (assuming it is indeed BS) and then use Chloe as an example of the narcissism that, they will say, is common to EVERY TS person who transitions in spite of the impact on those around them.


When that happens, Chloe's professed urge to help us will in fact have dealt us a blow.
Disclaimer: due to serious injury, most of my posts are made via Dragon Dictation which sometimes butchers grammar and mis-hears my words. I'm also too lazy to closely proof-read which means some of my comments will seem strange.


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