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Remembering Names

Started by K8, July 30, 2009, 07:11:05 PM

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K8

Conventional wisdom is that men tend to focus on things and women on relationships.  There is some research that backs this up.

I could never remember names well.  Long ago I got in the habit of not saying a person's name when talking to them because I was afraid of getting it wrong.

Since become Katherine, I am very good at remembering names.  Plus, I can remember relationships between people and some of their history – how they fit into the web of society.

Is this hormonal?  Is this because I am more relaxed because I'm finally me?  Is it because I've finally been admitted to the network knitted together with woman-talk?

If you are MtF, are you better at remembering people's names now?

If you are FtM, are you worse at remembering people's names now?

- Kate
Life is a pilgrimage.
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Wendy1974

I've experienced the same but I think it's just because I am not so self involved as I used to be.
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Bombi

I've have always been terrible at remembering names. I've tried all the association techniques to no avail. it's like when I meet someone my short term memory is non-esistant. Then I stress that when I see the person again I won't remember. My habit is now to say I'm embarrased and ask again. The same pre and post hRT. Wierd
Yes there is really bigender people
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lisagurl

I think in pictures not language so names go in one ear and out the other. I can remember the greatest details just not names of things.
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Deanna_Renee

Cool! Another good reason to look forward to transition. I have always been super bad with names - lucky to remember  my own some times.

Now if you tell me that learning and remembering new languages is easier, then I'm leaping in full force. Been trying to learn Japanese for years and just can't retain any of it for more than a minute or two.
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sneakersjay

I need to SEE something to remember it, either written down or shown.  I'm terrible remembering things I'm told verbally, like names, numbers, etc. 

If I've seen it or experienced it in some way, I can remember it easily.

So at work, when my boss mumbles on the phone and he's the type to be extremely irritated if you ask him to repeat stuff -- let's just say it can get stressful at times.  Can't hear, then can't remember.  He said... what?  Crap!


Jay


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Ms Bev

I've never been one to remember names very easily, and now that I'm in my late 50's, it's.........a little easier, I think because it was in my mid 50's that I transitioned, went full time. 
It might be that friends are more precious, and enemies need to be remembered.  In a male role, that was not as necessary.
I dunno


Bev





1.) If you're skating on thin ice, you might as well dance. 
Bev
2.) The more I talk to my married friends, the more I
     appreciate  having a wife.
Marcy
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perfectisolation

I'm terrible at names. Better with faces or remembering someone's name when I see their face... I'm not sure if this is a gender or hormone thing, or just a learning style thing (like visual or auditory etc)...
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Hannah

I have experienced what your'e talking about K8. The girl drawing my blood asked me the other day if my therapies were working, and it occurred to me that I've been so caught up in the physical that I hadn't really appreciated how lots of mental processes have been working better since hrt. If I recall my medical stuffs right, our brains are actually changing size and shape, that might explain some of it, not to mention we are sort of expecting these effects and might be causing them ourselves. Whatever, it's nice.
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Dante

I'm not sure if it's hormonal, because I am very bad at remembering names (pre-transition). I felt bad one year because I had been hanging out with this group of people the entire year, but I didn't know any of their names.  :embarrassed:

Quote from: Deanna_Renee on July 30, 2009, 09:35:41 PM
Been trying to learn Japanese for years and just can't retain any of it for more than a minute or two.

I really want to learn Japanese too! But no one offers classes around here.  :'( I have, however, picked up a lot of random words from watching anime and stuff like that. None of them are really useful, though.





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Lutin

Languages, numbers, birthdays etc. I'm fine with, but names and relationships, I'm utterly hopeless. A few times I've ended up talking to people at uni not knowing what their names are or what subject/s I had with them, but knowing that I do know them from somewhere. Once this girl waved and headed over to where I was sitting, and I only twigged when she said "Hola!" that I'd spent the last three years in Spanish with her. ::) :laugh: If she'd not said that I wouldn't have had a clue (still have no idea what her name was :icon_chuckel:). Absolutely tragically hopeless. ??? :laugh:
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finewine

QuoteI think in pictures

Apologies for the digression but interestingly, we all do (pictures or representations, that is).  When we recall an event, we recall image sequences and verbalize what we "see" (the visual cortex is heavily used in recalling & building mental representations, even though the input is from memory rather than the eye).

Nobody thinks in "scrolling text".  Try it!  You'll find you have an image of scrolling text in your mind's eye that you read to yourself.  I think it's nigh on impossible to think of a word without visualizing it.  All fascinating stuff.  Spawn off a new thread if you want to chat about it...
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Silver

Quote from: K8 on July 30, 2009, 07:11:05 PM
I could never remember names well.  Long ago I got in the habit of not saying a person's name when talking to them because I was afraid of getting it wrong.

I have the same habit right now. If it's true that it's hormonal, I can only imagine how bad I'll be at recognizing people and remembering names on T.

SilverFang
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Cindy

I think that women tend to talk amongst themselves about relationships and family. "Oh Cathy had another girl" "Oh is that her second and she is Tony's wife isn't she?" Tend to be commonish female talk topics. So you get to remember the relationships and names. Guys tend to talk about things and not relationships. "I know that Joe likes 4WDs, didn't know he was married"
So my 2 cents worth is that it is the socializing pattern rather than the hormones.

Then again I more interested in Cathy's babe than Joe's 4WD.

At another level, guys can name every player in a sport team, cricket (for Aussies) or baseball (for you Yankees). And probably can't name members of their family tree. There is an exception to this (sorry finewine aiming at you  :laugh:), The poms tend to try and forget anyone in their international cricket teams, usually with just cause.

LoL

Cindy

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Buffy

Quote from: CindyJames on July 31, 2009, 04:01:37 AM
Then again I more interested in Cathy's babe than Joe's 4WD.

At another level, guys can name every player in a sport team, cricket (for Aussies) or baseball (for you Yankees). And probably can't name members of their family tree. There is an exception to this (sorry finewine aiming at you  :laugh:), The poms tend to try and forget anyone in their international cricket teams, usually with just cause.

LoL

Cindy


Actually I am interested in both baby's and 4WD"'S- I had a conversation with my girlfriends last week about V8 engines, which was totally unexpected, steroetyping can be dangerous.

As for the Cricket, hopefully by the time this Pom arrives in Australia next week we will be 2-0 up in the Ashes series and I can rub a few Aussie noses in the dingo dirt!

The major difference is that to me my friends significant events, birthdays, anniverseries are important, I have them all in my Diary and buy cards well in advance when I see one that I feel meets the occassion.

My boyfriend (who's American) cant even remember my birthday but can recite how many home runs and stolen bases, RBI's any player of the Red Sox has this season (or other seasons)... But is that right, wrong or just a difference in things we find important.

Buffy

Heading for Oz in her union jackdress.
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finewine

Quote from: CindyJames on July 31, 2009, 04:01:37 AM
[...] There is an exception to this (sorry finewine aiming at you  :laugh:), The poms tend to try and forget anyone in their international cricket teams, usually with just cause.

Usually yeah!  Although we're giving it a good go at the current Ashes, eh?

BTW, I swear your avatar should be holding a skipping rope - something about that pose :)
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Cindy

Whoo
It's out of five my friends, so we have to win the next three. No problems as long as the Umpires aren't bribed - again :laugh:

I wasn't stereotyping Buffy, I was more trying to have a laugh. Oh be careful, if you arrive in Oz and the Ashes'are lost any one from UK will face strip searching, if allowed in at all. Just joking, if we give we can take it, and if not we should not be there.  I reckon the Poms have played really well and made use of modern technology. The best thing about this thread diversion is that few in the USA know what's about. WAR.

Love to both of you and Hugs

Cindy

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Dante

My thought was that, in most cases, you only hear a person's name once, and never see it spelled. If you're trying to remember a baseball player's name, for example, you'll see their name, and hear it, several times, making it a lot easier to remember.





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