Hi Pippa. Welcome to the forum.

Passing is an internal thing. You need some of the outer stuff, but mostly it comes from within.
Reading your introduction, I have two concerns:
Are you taking the hormones under a doctor's care? Hormones can be wonderful but also can cause all sorts of problems. Your health and progress need to be monitored by someone trained to keep you healthy.
It sounds like you are planning to surprise your family with the "new you." I don't think that is a good idea. I'm not sure what kind of family you have (parents and siblings, spouse and children), but this is a BIG change and it will be better to get them on board before your spring it on them.
I don't mean to be critical, but I'm concerned for your well-being. Nonetheless, welcome to Susan's, where you will find lots of people like us.

- Kate