Dominiq's question on another topic got me thinking about this, but since I come at it from a different perspective, I didn't want to highjack her thread with my own questions.
Dominiq's question, for those of you who didn't know, was about living "in the middle," taking hormones but not fully transitioning. I was interested in hearing any thoughts about this from people out there who might have insights into totally non-HRT approaches to the question. I've never really felt "female." I've appreciated and treasured my "male-ness" (even if the word "male" is so constructed as to be useless). But there's something inside of me that really loves being (acting?) more feminine (again, whatever that means), maybe if only in looks, but I'm not really interested in doing anything that would radically change the way I feel. And it's not really crossdressing, it's different; it's wanting breasts, for one thing, but not wanting to fully change the nature of a hard-won personal identity, of which "male" is a component.
I don't know if that makes any sense at all, but it's been my experience so far. So I just wanted to ask if anyone out there might have insights into this different sort of "life in the middle," a life that doesn't involve HRT but involves an interest...or maybe it's just a fascination?...with the exploration of being "feminine."
(And I really do hate those terms, but I can't think what else to use. I worry that people think "male" and think aggressive, or macho, or something. Or "feminine" and think that has to mean caring, compassionate, or submissive. Maybe it's an unfounded worry, but I try not to think of masculinity and femininity as hard categories like that.)
