This one time at band camp... I met this kid who thought he might be a girl...

Sorry, I just couldn't avoid this one. Welcome to the family Chris. When I was a young-whipper-snapper like you, I knew nothing about ->-bleeped-<- (I don't even think the term existed then) and was severely in denial about my desires. It took me nearly 5 decades to come to this realization that I was in fact a woman in a guys body. Now that I know, life is looking shiny and new.
I hope you can find all of the answers to the questions that are running through your mind now and in the future. I would also suggest when you are able, get in touch with a gender therapist, they will be able to really help you figure things out.
Welcome to the family, wherever you end up.

Deanna