Hi to Nicky, Viyola and all the members of Susans Place.
Having looked at some of the threads on the forum and being an active member of another forum for a short period of time I quess my story is similar to many others. Though I do realise that this being the case means I am not alone which was the big turning point for me.
Only by looking at my early childhood retrospectivley have I realised that I have not had gender issues so much, but have had a feminine side which led to crossdressing at an early age privately.
Long story short, I am happily married, fortunately to an understanding wife. She has known of my crossdressing for quite some time but never truely got to grips with it. It is only recently I have tried to discover how my mind works and why.
I recently decided to discuss the issues of femininity with my wife as it was causing distress to her and frustration for me.
After our talk she was so relieved at what I told her about my fem side as she had been thinking all sorts of things. The only thing that upset her was when I told her of the self loathing I had had for years. Having joined another forum earlier and realising I was not alone I am now far more relaxed about my self ( actually happy ) and our relationship is even stronger.
On the COGIATI test I score between 28 and 35 which basically puts me plumb in the middle of androgynous. Having researched what this exactly means I realise this used to thought of as a gift or special. ( not how a narrow minded society now views it.) I also recognise many of the traits androgynous people have as the same as my own.
To be honest I am now a very different person to how I used to be, much happier and probably a lot easier to get along with.
I have joined the forum to expand my knowledge as at 53 I am only just learning after all this time what I actually am, and to communicate with like minded people in an open and friendly enviroment.
I look forward to meeting you all.
ps. In a forum, Page is my feminine name and the name I will always use having identified and accepted this side of me. I am more relaxed with it, instead of as a male always having something to prove in life. I have stepped out of that world and feel better for it. I dont spell it with an "i" so its not a typo, just a new page of my life.