QuoteYou want something to inspire you?  How about this?
"Keep your eyes on the prize."  That was told to me by a member of the clergy many moons ago.  I remember it whenever the going gets tough. "Keep your eyes on the prize."  Don't let yourself get distracted. Don't let people get to you. Carry on

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Now that I can thank you for.  Is good advice and at present, very applicable to myself and my situation. I have to many things at once going on that sometimes make me think its not humanly possible to make it through it all, or have anything left to do with if I do, but I know that if I don't, there is no point to anything, so I somehow have to. Thank you, that is advice I can appreciate and understand. 

I am at the weakest point I have ever been in my life presently and I appreciate such words of wisdom and common sense.  They help rally what strength I have left to face what will fall over the next few months in my private matters that will affect any ability I have to address any concerns of my own at all. 

I am facing a civil matter over an auto accident a couple of months ago involving a pedestrian which could take everything I have and treaten everything I will make for the rest of my life, the timing is so very wrong, coming at a time when I must also address the issue of my marrage with finality and deal with doctors and their concerns all at once while worring about where the next dollar for surgery will come from even in the best of times.  I am not in focus and having to deal with emotions that have been in hiding for so long I had forgotten how to deal with them.  Just a normal day in the life of an average human being.

As to the rest, to close to my own thoughts to be used on me.  My own thoughts about B.O. is simply that there are to many that would seek it not out of real need, but in the perception that it can and would accomplish something that in most cases simply can't and won't do for them, and is therefore a waste of time, money and effort, especially for those who have no problems with spiro and can expect surgery in the near future.  Thus I would discourage it as a "Step" in the transition process as was suggested to me by someone in a private conversation about it.

I can only relate what it ment and did for myself as far as gender issues are concerned, which was of course Nothing at all, though I did not seek it, rather it was offered to me as an alternative over health issues and for that purpose it met a need.

I would not fault anyone for doing it for thier own gender issues if they truely believed it would help anything, as I can not know the exact nature of other peoples issues, only my own, but I would discourage any who sought to do so with unrealistic expectations.  I only wish to make others think about such issues and if the money could better be used on other things that would be of more value to them.  Same with issues like FFS.  I personally would never consider such a thing until more pressing priorities had been addressed before even giving such things a second thought.

With any such issues I believe that if they truely fulfill a need within ones self, then they will be better able to deal with other problems as they will have a healthier outlook on life and so be better able to deal with such, but if real needs are not met it is like you said yourself in another thread, surgeries can become an addiction while solving nothing in the way of real issues.

My point in such threads is simple.  Think about it, what priorites are number 1 ?

Sorry for the attitude you alluded to, I get that way when afraid of my own goals being threatend by things beyond my control.  Just leave hammers out of it when relating to me, its all I can do not to pull out a bigger one at times, I was trained that way by life.

Terri

i wasn't really thinking about this much before now, but now i think maybe it might be a good idea.  i don't tuck well.  i'm thinking that something's small or something's large - either way, same result.  i used to ignore the discomfort because i mistook that i had to "output a good impression to other people so they couldn't spoil my life"... but i stopped caring what bigots think, since.  and i don't see the harm, assuming i can save up for it before such a time as i have the final one done anyway (which might not happen).

as much as can be as much as, i suppose.  the genital area really bothers me.

Quote from: Thundra on August 07, 2005, 11:34:38 PM..."Keep your eyes on the prize." ...

So your life can rot out from under you?
This, to me, does not seem like a good idea.
In my opinion, blinders are bad.

Quote..."Keep your eyes on the prize." ...
So your life can rot out from under you?
This, to me, does not seem like a good idea.
In my opinion, blinders are bad.

Kimberly, I would say that there is a vast difference in ignoring whats going on and keeping mindful of prioriies, which is the way I took it.

Terri

Quotei wasn't really thinking about this much before now, but now i think maybe it might be a good idea.  i don't tuck well.

   

... interesting... response...



anyway, my thinking is: going to be done anyway at some point... as part of the procedure... so if it does make things more comfortable and if i do have the money at the time... then why not?  that was my thinking.  obviously, it's not the sole reason i would have it done... just the deciding reason.

If it improves your life and your outlook, do it as quickly as possible, but if it helps you tuck better and why the heck not? I'll just shut up.

Terri

Quote from: Terri-Gene on August 08, 2005, 03:54:45 AM
Kimberly, I would say that there is a vast difference in ignoring whats going on and keeping mindful of prioriies, which is the way I took it. ...

Valid point. I've found those two points tend to hold hands however, but perhaps that is just me

sorry i don't know if you were agreeing or disagreeing with what i said, but either way, i wouldn't tell you to "just shut up" or anything like that.  say what you want to say by all means, no problem here. 

<< My own thoughts about B.O. is simply that there are to many that would seek it not out of real need, but in the perception that it can and would accomplish something that in most cases simply can't and won't do for them, and is therefore a waste of time, money and effort, especially for those who have no problems with spiro and can expect surgery in the near future. >>

Understood.  I was alluding to the fact, that life throws curve balls more often than not.  "The best laid plans of mice and men are laid to waste" comes to mind.  I'm bad with quotes, but the point is, that you can never count on anything.  You may plan on something to happen at this or that time, but all too often, if you do not take opportunities when you have the chance, you may end up missing the boat because it does not show up.  If a BO is economical, why the hell not?

"Keep you eyes on the priize" was a gift to the congregation from a visiting minister that had an incredibly arduous journey in finding her way into her place in the clergy. Her journey was full of false starts, pitfalls, and many, many sidetracks.  And the thing that always drew her back to where she needed to be, was that little phrase she repeated to herself.  It maintained her poise under fire, and her focus on her her long term goals, and the motivation to deal with the many annoying little things that happened along the way...because she knew she had to take care of business to reach her goals.

Like I said, you still gotta pay the rent and feed the cat.

Quotesay what you want to say by all means, no problem here.

that's the point lana, I very well do say what I want and in this case, I choose to just keep it to myself, it has nothing to do with what you would want or not want me to say, only what *I* feel I should or should not say in a general public environment.
 

QuoteUnderstood.  I was alluding to the fact, that life throws curve balls more often than not.  "The best laid plans of mice and men are laid to waste" comes to mind.  I'm bad with quotes, but the point is, that you can never count on anything

boy has that one ever come home over the last couple of years.  When I first started HRT I wasn't worried about anything, In my pride and arrogance I thought I was prepared for anything and knew myself completely and intimately, making me able to cope with anything life could throw.

One of the things I have learned about that was that what I thought I knew of myself was based on the experience and the environment of the past, not of the present.  It turns out that the difference in the me of now and the me of the past are so vastly different as for the present to completely nullify anything I thought I knew of myself before.  Not only the environment has changed, but the way I cope with things, meaning I must learn who I am all over again and what I knew before has little bearing on the matter at this time other then basic core beliefs I must rediscover and place in proper context for the now.

It's a time of much self examination and learning what it all means in a new world I often do not understand as I had thought I did.  Wake up calls, ya know?

As to things like B.O.  I'd rather just not discuss it anymore, I see it as giving to many people to many ideas they haven't a clue about or even begin to realize what they really want in life.

Terri

I had an orchiectomy (or castration as I often call it) almost 2 months ago, and I am so glad I did that first and don't have to worry about any more T

A big part of why I did it is because for me SRS could be 5 years away. My priority is FFS, and unless hormones do much more than I expect, that's something I'm going to want before I go full time.

I am concerned about how it could affect SRS, but in the end I'm just happy I got it done. I haven't had a spontaneous erection in several weeks, and those pesky morning erections are almost gone too

If I were planning on SRS next year, I may not have done it. Then again, maybe I would have. I think it doesn't make much sense for T and E to be battling each other. Even with anti-androgens there is still battling. I'd rather have estrogen feminize me unopposed.

I've been thinking about having  an orchiectomy done more to save money when I start taking hormones so as to cut back on the spiro, cause I won't have to worry about the testosterone.

As I've jsut recently found out, I have to have one or two letters from a qualified therapist dealing with transseaxuals in order to have SRS done, and right now that possibility is looking very bleak.

Where could I find a doctor that could perform the surgery for me and I guess I'd have to check and see if he's covered in my medical plan.  That would be a real plus for me. 

Does anybody have any websites for the Florida area that i could check out?

Gina

 What are you going to tell the Dr. about wanting an orchi?

You need a letter from a therapist for that also.

Thanks Leigh. I didn't realize that there was so much RED TAPE involved.  Guess I'll have to start seeing my therapist again and see where I can go from there.
Gina

Hi all, I am definately going to have BO. I cannot afford SRS anytime soon butafter I see my Therapist I bet that he will more than recomend that I have this done. I do worry about scrotal and penile shrinkage for the purpose of donor stuff for SRS but hey if I can get rid of that aweful T and let me be calm and have estrogen rule the perch then "you go girl" I say.

I hate them "the things between my legs" they are the reason I am in this mess.

Has anyone found out what levels of T would be left in your body after BO, you still have your adrenal glands or something that produces a bit but how much???


Sara.

QuoteHas anyone found out what levels of T would be left in your body after BO

Never really checked on that for specifics.  I can tell you that it is not redily measurable in standard blood tests.

Consider that there are several glands of the body that produce T, even in females, so what is cheapest and easiest to do is measure free estrogen levels.  That might not mean much to those not in transition, but it doesn't take the normal large dosages any more to produce a estrogen level the same or more then the average female.  I know that my own blood levels are Testosterone less then 20, which means not measurable and Estrogen over 180 which is high for female normal average.  Without operating testicles producing normal testosterone there is not enough testosterone in the body to be of any significant effect.

Penis shrikage happens basically because of non use.  For those who retain sex drive and are comfortable with having sex, shrinkage will not amount to enough to worry about.  The scrotum skin will of course shrink some after a bilateral, but you can reduce this by streatching the skin in a regular routine.  It only shrinks because there is nothing inside holding it out.

Some shrinkage of the scrotum tissue is desirable though after an orchie, as at first when the skin is simply loose and hanging, it gets caught up in wrinkles/folds of skin or in clothing and this can hurt like hell when the skin in pinched.  As it shrinks up some and holds up more smoothly it doesn't get caught as much or at all and it feels more comfortable.  you win a little you lose a little.

Terri Gene, Thanks for that bit of information. When I was on my hormone medication complete, the Endo said I had the hormones of a 30 year old woman. My testosterone went down to 0.02 or something like that which is very low and I did get tired but was able to keep afloat. The Endo said that I shouldnt worry about the level of T too much and that it is working so I agreed with him and pressed ahead. He is wonderful my Endo.

I just hated being on high volumes of Spiro and Androcur as I thought it may damae my liver or kidneys but he said that all the tests were good. I get worried that over time things could happen that is why and because of what has happened in the past with my health and of course the money side of things that I will be asking for a BO. One thing my Endo did say is that I may feel crappy after the BO. Is this true?

Sara.

Bumping this because I'd like to know the answer too.

A quick calculation shows that it may be another 3 years before I can afford SRS, and that's if my job lasts long enough and no other major expenses come up. (That depends on conditions not related to my TSism.) I have clothes I'm reluctant to wear because for me no tuck is ever completely invisible nor completely painless. I haven't been tested since starting spiro so I don't know what my T level is now (before spiro it was a whopping 623  yuck!). And I am concerned about possible carcinogenic effects of spiro since at least 2 of my ancestors have had cancer.

OTOH, having an orchi would delay my being able to afford SRS by about 3 months.

I see some really good points on both sides in this thread, I really do. For myself though, I am going to have to talk to the doc about this.