(Yes, another forum name change but I think this one really fits with me.)

Anyway, my appointment with the trans friendly therapist is in early January and it's driving me nuts. I'm so close but so far away, and on top of that I have to have to wait even longer for the evaluation... which might end up being after my birthday which means I lose insurance from my parents. I don't think it'll be too bad if I can get more work, but I feel like I'm going through mood swings all the time because I'm anticipating this.

Arghhhhh... what did you do? I'm trying to keep myself busy but I go from determined, to stressed, to depressed, to overly enthusiastic.

I worked out and slept a lot. It was a hard time for sure. I tried all kinds of stuff to keep busy and keep my mind off stuff. Volunteered at places, seemed like whenever I had time to think that was all I could think about.
Andrew

Quote from: myles on November 26, 2009, 10:29:39 PM
I worked out and slept a lot. It was a hard time for sure. I tried all kinds of stuff to keep busy and keep my mind off stuff. Volunteered at places, seemed like whenever I had time to think that was all I could think about.
Andrew

Yeah, I've been trying to keep myself busy, but I feel like I'm overworking myself at the same time. I have a really weird mind, I can be focused on something else but thinking about something else at the same time, it's annoying.

I did things that occupied my mind. I know the lyrics to some really strange songs since I listened to tapes to figure out the lyrics and then sang them to myself over and over. It helped, but I too, did the workout and sleep thing.

Meditation can help if you can find someone to teach 'Mindfulness'.
  There's really nothing mystical or 'New Agey' about it, just learning how breath control can alter the way the body reacts, and how to slow the heart rate, reduce reaction to pain, relax etc. It helps me stay focused at work.
I learnt for pain control while recovering from a severe back injury, at a class run for cancer palliative care patients.  Any Hospital should be able to provide a contact for a cheaper instructor, who is intent on helping people, not  just making a buck.

I know where you're coming from, as much as I loathe to admit not being in perfect calm and happy control.

I know in my case it's a lot of stress (I hate that word, it's overused) from multiple different sources coming together on top of chasing T that's got me simultaniously bouncing off and punching walls.

I was told to investigate "stress control" activities, and enact one 3 - 5 times a day, regardless of if I think I need them right then and there, or not. Apparently by the time your're stressed enough to think about doing "stress control", you're already not thinking clearly.

The wait is bad enough on it's own, but that is something you can't really do anything about. Look around and see if there is something that is bugging you that you can do something about in the meantime.

But yes, it's agony and you aren't the only one to have felt it. It's happy depressive fustrating exciting rage, and it's a total left field headf*** for those of us who aren't used to feeling anything at all.