I have a very bad problem with anger. It's getting to the point where I'm seriously afraid I'm going to end up killing myself from doing something stupid or doing it to someone else. I can't control it. I've tried punching things, I've tried venting, I've tried thinking about things logically, I've tried drawing it out, I've tried many things. I just get pissed. It's not just anger it's full blown rage.
Some people, regardless of what they do, just piss me off just thinking about them. I can't shut my brain off on a subject, I've tried, I can't. I have no clue if hormones are gonna change this or not, and I don't want to get my hopes up for something that could just be a different issue. I don't know what to do.
I feel like I'm immune to pills. For everything. Even a quartazone shot wouldn't work on me and my parents think it's because I'm stressed out all the time. I have anxiety attacks that last hours, which is not very normal at all. My doctor put me on these pills that are supposed to make me sleepy, and he thought they could help me while I wait. I don't think they're working and they're really messing me up sleep wise. I have insomnia, he thought they would help my mood but they're not really working out.
I don't think T is really going to change all the issues I have, I'm not sure if it can. All I know is I feel incredibly unhealthy and I don't know what to do. I've tried really hard for years to take myself as far as I can go, but I don't know what else to do.
I have no idea how to solve this. I don't know why I'm posting this but maybe I'm hoping someone can kick me in the pants and give me a possible solution.