Greetings everyone,
I am thankful to have found these forums and have lurked here for a couple years off and on. I finally decided to register here so that I could fully participate in discussions.
When I was delicately thrust into this wonderful world, I first suspected something was wrong when the attending Doctor proclaimed "male" just by glancing at me. I also found it odd that they gave me a certain name without a choice in the matter. And just when things were getting interesting, I felt a priest pour cold water over my forehead and he declared me baptized....
Seriously though, I was very sheltered as a child and no stranger to physical and mental abuse, received from both my father, my step-father, my mother and later my "school psychologist" (who was later convicted of child molestation on more than a handful of counts).
Blind obedience, I found, was not my strong suit – much to my parents dismay. I was curious, and found out from my parents that I was some sort of little devil. I discovered that I was bisexual (or polysexual if you prefer) at an early age. I liked to wear women's clothing, makeup, refused to cut my hair (as often as possible), had no interest in sports, mechanics, physical labor... and at this point I think I would end up repeating parts of stories that have been told and retold here by many folks. And I mean to make no assumptions – but I'll spare you the repetition if I can.
I was given over custody to the state at the age of 15. I lived in a facility with where only boys resided, and was forced to present and act, in every way, as a boy (it was either that or go to the juvinile jail). 2 years, 2 months and 2 weeks later I returned home to my mom and was convinced that the right thing to do was to live the successful life that my parents wanted and to remain an outstanding citizen of society.
Through years of blind obedience, fear, anger and youthful ignorance... etc, (editing out gratuitous repetition)...
All with in 3 years, starting in 2000 - my step-dad, my father, grandmother and grandfather passed away (all unrelated deaths).
I just about gave up at that point. But with the help and compassion of the best friends I have ever met, I discovered that I was transgender, after many educational talks.
I am seeing a psychologist currently and have been for over a year now. In addition, I have begun seeing a gender specialist as well as a new endocrinologist (the local 'endo' changed his location). I have been on hormones for just over 6 months now and am much happier and healthier so far. I started my RLE a couple of months after starting hormones. My legal name change should be official this coming week (hurray!).
I traveled a few times to attend a TG support group but felt that what that group had to offer during these meetings was not worth the long ride/gas (I did not have a vehicle at the time). I would definitely consider attending a local support group but there are none in the small city I currently live in.
I lost my job a month ago because of my transition. Unfortunately I currently reside in a state without protections. Though I am hopeful of finding a new job in the near future who will welcome me despite my honesty with them.
I have told this story a few times now and have tried to condense it as much as possible for this post, though I did leave out a lot of detail and explanations. I also left out a lot of the positives in my life, of which there have actually been many. (I welcome gentle inquiries concerning omissions or lack of details in this post.)
I'm looking forward to going back to school for some psychology/social work and changing my career to helping people, specifically those within the transgender community.
My family (mom, sister, brother) all now know about my transition (and consequently, my sexual orientation identity) since I was first diagnosed with GID. They are very supportive and are even happier that I communicate with them again frequently. They have gone through a lot of changes and growth over the years themselves, which is a wonderful plus to me.
My coming out in general and my RLE up to this point as been really smooth, with the exception of being fired because of my transition, and having difficulty finding qualified medical professionals in this area.
I have had the same boyfriend for 8 years now, who has stuck with me through everything we have been through. He looks forward to and supports my transition. And though he is the monogamous type, he is open to the idea of ... Oh, I suppose this is where I should touch on the topic of polyamory. Hmm... or not. I'll save it for a different discussion.
...(eesh, after all the edits I've made, I realize that a lot of my story is really quite similar to others here)...
Oh, my baby kitten has grown to one year old! Though there is something adorable and odd about her... I believe she thinks she is a dog. We bought her those small, soft balls to play with? Well, she started playing fetch since the first day she had them. She now insists on playing fetch daily. We didn't teach her anything, and she has never met a dog... No idea. But it always makes me smile.
And that's it for now... getting... sheepy. Zzzz
[edit: spelling]
