on my 18th birthday, which was about two days ago, I built up all of my Courage and I came out to my sister. She didn't really seem to take it to hard it really seemed like she didn't take it hard enough. It seems like the way she was talking that she thought i had some kind of mental disorder and some pill would cure it. I tried to tell her otherwise and mentioned that even if a pill COULD cure it that the "cure" would be worse then the problem. It would be like the real me died and someone else took its place. Over time she talked me into letting her tell my dad (he got a new job and he is working in a different state until we complete this year of school and then we will move down) and when she did he called me up. He started talking to me, but something seemed off it seemed like i was reading a diary of his day. He would say what he was doing as he was doing it I was confused about what was going on. Right before he got off he brought it up, but in a different manner then what i was expecting. He said he understood and everyone had there own problems they have to deal with. I don't have a problem with what he said, but it seemed like neither of them would put any thought into letting me change they just want to cover up the problem and move on. Did i hold to much back when I came out to my sister? What should i have done? How should I tell them that I intend to change?

A couple of things you might want to look at.

https://www.susans.org/reference/gfam7.html
https://www.susans.org/reference/gfam4.html
https://www.susans.org/reference/gfam3.html



Hugs and Love,
Janet

I found that to be a common reaction from people.  Ok, fine, whatever, yeah, don't worry, we'll fix it, and on they go.  But after time, and they see you taking steps, they'll be like whoa, wait, what, it wasn't a phase?  You're doing WHAT?

But coming out is the first step, and they will ask more questions later.  Trust me!  LOL


Jay

what jay said.

Well, it took a lot of courage to come out, so bravo. That's a very difficult step to take, especially where family is involved.

I think you handled it properly. I'd have to agree with Jay as to how it'll go from there. I wish you luck!

-Wren

Totally what jay said. I told my family and they were like "ok - carry on, we love you no matter what" and then later on it was like "hormones!! WTF, that really worries me".

I don't think you did anything wrong. Well done for talking to them! I think it is important not to let is slide out of sight, keep talking about it. You don't want to be comming out a second time. You are out, you can start living out. But it takes a lot of energy, it is still you doing all the work.

In telling them about change - my suggestion is don't make it a subject that is up for discussion, don't give them a say in your decisions - i.e. "To help resolve my gender issues I am going to do this....I would really appreciate your support".

Best of luck!

Also agree with what Jay said, and what Nicky said too.  I expected a much stronger reaction from my family, but instead they are treating it completely like a non-issue, or basically ignoring it actually. Even after several months full time when there was no way I could hide the changes from hormones any longer they never said a single word about it, only that I "looked good". Hey, it's a start, at least they're not disowning us.

This is just the first coming out stage.  I think people tend to go through a range of emotions and don't let it all out for a while.  Give it some time for them to absorb and maybe read about it then they'll prolly show you their true beliefs and views on it. 

When I came out it was like a month where it was quiet and just nothing about it, then the whole emotional stage of "WHYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!" then eventually the acceptance or like hatred of it I guess?  I'm sure that with time they'll give you another response, so just hold out and I would just let them think about it for a little while.  Most people don't have any real information on this so they're sorta awestruck at first probably.

My parents were told first, then my brothers and sister. All were initially supportive, then suddenly the support disappeared to be replaced by hatred and loathing. I've no idea why, I think as others said it may have been the thought that it wasn't a phase I was going through and that I meant it, or that I was going to be an embarrasment to them in front of their friends. My parents, though, never stopped loving and supporting me. All this was 25 years ago and I haven't seen my brothers or sister since then.
It's a tough one and you never know how its going to turn out. I often wonder if I'd come out differently to them it might have been different, but in those days the internet was in it's infancy and no information was available on line so I just told them face to face individually. But maybe the outcome would still have been the same.