My doc told me that I'm going to have to have one of THOSE exams done.  Ick x one million.  I've been having problems with the nether regions.  The doc wants to set up an appointment with an obgyn and I told her I'd have to think about it.  I'm in my 30s and have never had one done.  On the plus side, I will probably be able to get a hysterectomy covered by the insurance because there are problems.  But I really really don't want to go through with this--getting it done will be highly traumatic for me (even though the doc said she would prescribe some sedatives for me).  I'm trying to steel myself to do it, but I just don't think I'll be able to.  I hate being in this body.   

You have my sympathies. Some guys can only get through it if they are sedated--but they get through it. If you're having problems, then you do need to be looked at. And if you want a hysto and there's a chance you can get it covered, then keep thinking of that. Keep your eyes on the prize.

You can do this.

All I can say is hang in there, and best wishes. You have to do it sometime. Look on the bright side, you'll be that much closer to getting that thing removed.

Quote from: Arch on December 22, 2009, 10:51:52 PM
You have my sympathies. Some guys can only get through it if they are sedated--but they get through it. If you're having problems, then you do need to be looked at. And if you want a hysto and there's a chance you can get it covered, then keep thinking of that. Keep your eyes on the prize.

You can do this.

They can sedate you? Like... out-out?

That's the only way I could ever do that. I know it's important for my health, but ugghhh... I think I'd have a panic attack that would seem like hysteria.

You have my sympathy.

I've never been through it myself (I've only had an external ultrasound to rule out PCOS - that was bad enough and I got to keep my pants on), but I've had doctors try to talk me into it. I'm probably going to have to go through it to go on T though .

Eyes on the prize is right. Just keep thinking about a possible hystro.

I've hear it goes easier if you just zone out. Try to stay in the mindset that they're looking at some other body part, or they're just looking under the hood of a car or something. Essentially, that's what it is. I've been told they see upwards of 50 of the things per day - it's nothing weird to them.

Do tell the examiner how uncomfortable you are. They are professionals, and they'll be trying to make you feel at ease. They might not have delt with that particular body part attached to a man, but I'm sure most of them have delt with one of those things attached to some nervous or traumatised women before.

Oh, and my mothers advise - relax your muscles as much as possible, wear clean underwear, and shower before you leave for the appointment.

Try to stay positive. Joke and laugh if you can. And just keep thinking about how it'll bring you closer to your goals.

Quote from: Lachlann on December 22, 2009, 11:32:32 PM
They can sedate you? Like... out-out?

I don't think so, although I suppose it's not out of the realm of possibility. I've never been sedated for that exam.

What the others said: think of the prize -- getting the offending parts removed and paid for by insurance.

Of all the things during my initial transition, that surgery alone was the absolute best, followed by changes on T.  The moobs were annoying at worst but not nearly so.

And once the dang vag goes, I'll be in heaven.



Jay

Quote from: Arch on December 23, 2009, 03:03:31 AM
I don't think so, although I suppose it's not out of the realm of possibility. I've never been sedated for that exam.

I guess there's no harm in asking them if they do.

Ouch, i hear you. I really do. I've also been having issues and need to have "it" looked at again at some point soon. I just grin and bear it - say "it's for your health, after this one since you're not "active" you won't have to do "it" for another two years" and that's that.

Good thought though on using "those problems" (whatever they may be) as an excuse to have insurance cover SOMETHING that's part of the transition. I'll have to bring that up if i need any type of surgery.... ((deep thought))

I get more fussy about strep tests to be honest.... i can meditate things going on "down there" away pretty easily but can't when i've got a foreign object (that i don't want there) poking down my throat.

Good luck, though!

It's really important to feel safe with whoever is doing the exam. I strongly suggest that you talk to your GP about who the best person is for you. Then, if you can, arrange an initial consult without an exam.

For the exam itself, if it helps to have someone with you, arrange it. If you need to have your iPod playing at full blast, take it along. If you need sedation, ask for it. If you prefer your doc to be a particular gender, only consider people of that gender.

I once saw a slogan, aimed at transmen, something like "Real men get Pap Smears." Nice idea, much harder in practice. You do what you have to do to take care of yourself. Just keep thinking, "Hysto, hysto, hysto!"

Quote from: Arch on December 23, 2009, 07:20:00 PM
It's really important to feel safe with whoever is doing the exam. I strongly suggest that you talk to your GP about who the best person is for you. Then, if you can, arrange an initial consult without an exam.

For the exam itself, if it helps to have someone with you, arrange it. If you need to have your iPod playing at full blast, take it along. If you need sedation, ask for it. If you prefer your doc to be a particular gender, only consider people of that gender.

I once saw a slogan, aimed at transmen, something like "Real men get Pap Smears." Nice idea, much harder in practice. You do what you have to do to take care of yourself. Just keep thinking, "Hysto, hysto, hysto!"

Thanks for the tips. I'll keep it in mind.

It seems a little less scary now.

Thanks guys.  My GP says she knows an obgyn who's really good and who is female.  I think I will do the first appointment as just a consult thing.  The sedatives my GP said she would prescribe for me won't knock me out, but she said it should help take the edge off the anxiety.  I'll have to find someone to drive me though.

MP3 player is a good idea...

I just don't know if I'll be able to go through with it.  I've heard of people getting a hysto done without having to have an exam...something I should talk with the doc about.  I also need to tell the doc about the gender issues.

Hmm, if I go for the exam, I could be really cruel and not shower for a couple of weeks beforehand.    (joking!)

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Post Merge: December 23, 2009, 08:38:49 PM

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Quote from: Arch on December 23, 2009, 07:20:00 PM

I once saw a slogan, aimed at transmen, something like "Real men get Pap Smears."

Just had to lol at that.

While I don't have much advice, it makes me feel better to know it's perfectly fine to be in one's 30s and never have had a gyno exam. I'm 27, and even though every doc who's prescribed T for me has said I need to have an exam, I've never done it. Eventually, I'll bite the bullet and go, but I'm dreading it as well.

Oh, and be glad you're going for a hysto eventually. I'm not, so once I start having those exams, I'll be committed for the rest of my life.

SD

Whenever I visit the obgyn (I go pretty regularly because of a medical issue) I just have a good time.  Sometimes I bring a female friend of mine and we joke around in the waiting room about her being expecting, sometimes I just go by myself and hit on all the nurses+female doctor, other times I just enjoy the faces of the people in the waiting room when I get called in by myself.  I always joke around with the nurses and the doctor as well.  I once had the doc laughing so hard she could barely give me the exam.  I find all this helpful, because it allows me to control the situation, rather than letting it control me, which was always my root issue--if you walk in there with your confidence and your pride showing, then I guarantee you're going to walk out with it intact as well.

Bah ha... I can feel my pulse spike just thinking about it. I'm in my early 20's and still refuse to have one done (don't need it unless you're having sex, right?). It'll be interesting if they expect me to have an exam before I can start T. Not sure what I'll do then.

Just thought I'd give an update.  Well, I went but just couldn't do the exam.  I'm beating myself up a bit about it but...well, I almost had a panic attack just sitting in the examining room.  I feel really horrible and icky even without having had the exam done.  I did mention my gender issues and asked her about T, but she said she couldn't prescribe it and that my regular doctor wouldn't be able to prescribe it (she even called my doc to make sure, which I wasn't happy about, since I haven't told my regular doc about my gender issues.  )  She seemed disapproving of the idea of me being on T (though I could've been imagining it), and told me I couldn't get a hysterectomy done without a pelvic exam (bummer).  She said I would just have to find someone on my own to prescribe the T.  I felt like such a freak sitting in there talking to her about it.  Not a happy camper right now.   

As far as I know Ob/Gyns can and DO prescribe T. Seems like she just didn't want to.  Plus any medical doctor can prescribe T, however since they aren't specialists in hormones such as an endo they usually leave that to them.

Dude that both sucks and blows 
I always sign a waiver - saying like I refuse to have the exam and any consequences are on me, like informed consent but its a refusal (if that makes any sense?!)
Could you try that? The doc said oh have you had a pap recently and I told him no and I'm not having one either. He asked why and I said look I tried once and the whole evolution was a disaster I can't relax, for me it hurts and its a little traumatic so I refuse to have it done and said I'd sign a waiver. That was when I went in for my first appointment to obtain T.
I've never had one of those exams. I don't plan to. And I've been on T 2 months. Those parts are just a health risk to me IMHO...
See if you can do something like that dude - what can they say NO?? We go back to the drawing board and brainstorm stratergies again

Quote from: Osiris on January 25, 2010, 08:21:58 PM
As far as I know Ob/Gyns can and DO prescribe T. Seems like she just didn't want to. 

My thoughts exactly.

Quote from: Osiris on January 25, 2010, 08:21:58 PM
Plus any medical doctor can prescribe T, however since they aren't specialists in hormones such as an endo they usually leave that to them.

I thought so, that they could prescribe it.  That ticks me off even more what she said.

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Post Merge: January 25, 2010, 08:47:26 PM

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Quote from: Aussie Jay on January 25, 2010, 08:23:06 PM
Dude that both sucks and blows 
I always sign a waiver - saying like I refuse to have the exam and any consequences are on me, like informed consent but its a refusal (if that makes any sense?!)
Could you try that?

She said she couldn't prescribe it for me under any circumstances, end of story. 

Quote from: Aussie Jay on January 25, 2010, 08:23:06 PMSee if you can do something like that dude - what can they say NO?? We go back to the drawing board and brainstorm stratergies again

Yeah, she told me I didn't really need a pap smear, as I'm not sexually active, but still wanted to give me one.  Err, no.  The only reason I went was because my regular doctor thought I might have cysts on the ovaries.  And because I hoped to get a hysterectomy.  And I did want to see what my options were for starting T.  I see my pdoc on the second (I don't know if a psychiatrist can prescribe T though, probably not), maybe she can point me in the right direction.  But I kind of doubt it, I live in a very homophobic part of the country.

I'm 19 and just had my first "wtf exam" about a month ago... My mom and my girlfriend went with me, which was nice because I didn't feel entirely alone- I still felt extremely awkward though, from the time we walked into the building to the second we walked out. I still shudder at the thought of having it done but my family dr, my endo, and therapist all said it was important.. so I went.

I didn't really do anything that helped me get through it other than try to ignore everything that was going on.. my g/f was in the room with me so after the exam I pretty much collapsed into her arms for a minute before I gathered myself and realized my personal necessity to get dressed. I felt completely vulnerable..

As negative as this post seems though, the exam itself wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be, it was short and to the point and I was extremely happy to get it over with.

Good luck to any of you who may be facing this in the future