Hi everyone!
So I went to the surgery wednesday the 30th.
I put a really short conclusion at the end for who feels like getting "the point" can skip, but I am writing my experiences and thoughts here so whoever reads it, it is appreciated
I decided, though to my surgeon high recommendations against forehead surgery that it is either true or beyond his skill to do so and either reasons are probably good enough to not do the forehead with him.
I still went for chin and nose for the hope it might be enough (he might be right) and to help me, even though my feelings were that the forehead would be a huge improvement and highly recommended, I don't know when would be my other opportunity for surgery as Israeli budget and currency is quite low compared to UK/US one.
I decided that it would bring up two scenarios, which I will get back to later, I decided I will start with my recovery story
Recovery!
I must say, surgery was terrifying. I am sure my family thought I am fearless, just wanting surgery fix, invasive, who cares, no danger.
I been having meetings with my social worker and for weeks she was the only one understanding how scared I am from the surgery itself.
I had some philosophical phobia from the anesthesia which is probably very irrational but made it very difficult for me.
My fear was, if they "turn off" your consciousness (and mind you, it's NOT just like sleep AT ALL) and then back on, is it still really you? Silly probably but everyone with their own!
Waking up the surgery morning felt like it's the last day, It was as if I am about to do a leap of faith, feeling as if I am about to die.
I went for it because I really hoped to improve my life and hoped my fears are wrong.
Other fears (although lessened by a fear of absolute death) were surgery complications, bad results and disappointment.
I went into the surgery, kinda terrified, but I made it
Waking up I was only glad for being alive and feeling it is me, even though I could never prove to another person with the same philosophical dilemma that it is really me (and I wouldn't know if it wasn't), I was really happy when I woke up and my question is over and I just hope it wasn't just luck in case I need to go again
For the recovery itself:
Pain wasn't that bad, the first few days of having the pads inside the nose and having it completely stuffed weren't nice.
Most of the pain was in the mouth just below the lower lip, where they penetrated to get to the chin.
After a few days the pads from the nose is removed, the worse thing that is still left is that I am not allowed to blow my nose (still kinda full but much better! can breath through it now) and that when I wake up (had that before removal of the pads too) I have a taste of dry blood in my mouth, which I hope is due to the chin surgery in case I will ever need nose surgery again (see scenarios later)
I look funny, a bit annoyed to look at the mirror - all I see is the forehead and it makes me kinda feel "I should have done it", I know I could just be mistaken and it is all psychological, worse thing is that I believe it isn't.
Other than that I want to see what changes but need to wait to remove the bandages and splint and for the swelling to go away
I really hope for it to be really good. Mom says the surgeon was really happy and satisfied as he went out.
Another thing that comes to my mind is that my lip-nose distance became to appear quite bigger, and I feel pretty conscious of it (I was kinda ok with the pre distance but not it looks a bit big, though might look better after recovery).
A problem is that I don't want to do lip lift and even if I wanted I am a bad candidate because I show quite a bit of teeth already and my lips are full.
Reason I don't want is because I don't want to change the shape of my lips or inject silicon at all.
And now back to the two scenarios which I had in mind after deciding I will do chin and nose at this time:
1) That I do the surgery, the forehead is not needed at all and is just my feeling (I have doubts on that! :/ but hey) I will finally be able to pass 100% and start with my life
2) That I do the surgery, it will probably help quite a bit but I might still have problems due to the forehead being quite a big part of my face (I REFUSE BANGS!) and would require having a second surgery (NOT FUN!), so far so good, sort of (well not really good but you know), what makes it really scary is to need to have to do nose surgery again to fit the nose bridge with the forehead properly.
That means like double the money (if looking on Dr O prices, who is my choice for forehead work) and recovering from nose surgery isn't the best of fun.
Conclusion:
recovery isn't that bad, not really comfy but not all that terrible. Liquid and mashed diet is kinda fun
Hoping for good results, and that there is no need for the forehead surgery (and if there is, that there is no need for doing nose surgery to adjust the bridge to the forehead due to budget [!!! big time] and recovery) but feeling that there is and a bit unhappy of that.
Some feelings a bit lip-nose distance appearing even bigger after surgery, being a bad candidate for lip lift due to the amount of teeth shown already. Don't want to change lip shape anyways and don't want silicon injections.
The end! (or is it? :O)
