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Not feeling right with God

Started by Walter, September 08, 2009, 05:39:00 AM

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Nigella

Hi, sorry but I am a bit late to this post. I am a Christian and even though I am transsexual I consider myself evangelical in the sense that it means to preach the gospel of Christ. Anyway my post is in regard to the struggle I have had with my gender and being a Christian. I came to the conclusion that God has said there is neither male or female in the Kingdom of God just children of God. Gender has never been an issue with God. The Ethiopian Eunuch is a case in point in the book of Acts. Here we have a eunuch who without the effects of Testosterone would be feminised in form. I know its mtf and not ftm but in the Bible these are underlying principles. So what does Peter do when the eunuch asks to be baptised there and then. Well Peter baptises them in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. He didn't say go away you are unacceptable because of your condition. His Heart was right and that's what counts with God. A genuine heart that seeks God.

Feelings are not the best way to judge what God thinks of us. Feelings change as much as the wind blows or the seasons change. Believe what God has said and what Jesus has done on the cross. He has paid the price of our sin on the cross to set us free to follow him. To share our experiences of God as we encounter Him by faith in our daily walk with him. Jesus said, "no one can pluck us out of the Fathers hand" He keeps us there even when we feel we are not. Paul wrote in Romans Chapter 8 that not even death it self can separate us from the love of God that is given to us in Christ Jesus our Lord.

I once heard someone say that if we rely on feelings and our faith looks to feelings we will feel abandoned, cursed, less that what we are in Christ. If however we take our feelings and look to faith then we have confidence in what God has done. It says in the Bible, "That God so loved the world that he sent his one and only son that whosoever believes in him will not perish but have eternal life." Now put your name where it says whosoever. Let your feelings look to faith.

I still have my doubts now and then but I doubt my doubts and believe my beliefs.

Blessings of the new year and may God shine his light upon you.

Stardust     
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Walter

Thank you, stardust :) Your message was really inspiring. Lately I've been not feeling right with God again, but whenever I read inspiring messages like that, it gets me to thinking. And then, I feel confident again. Thank you again ^___^
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Ms Jessica

At the risk of just being a little blog-whore, I was just thinking about some of these things.  Rather than do a lengthy cut and paste and fix all the links, I'll just link to the original post.

The thing to remember is that God doesn't hate you, bad things happen to people for all kinds of reasons.  I don't think any of us can say why we're trans, but I think it seems pretty plain that God's not in the habit of making us happy cisgender people.  Maybe he just really likes diversity. 

I think the important thing to realize is that if you love God and love your neighbor, you're doing the things you need to be doing. 

Every once in a while I feel the same way: what am I doing, can this possibly be right?  We do what we can with what we have, and if we mess up, then hopefully God will have mercy on us.  We're already banking on that fact, aren't we?  Why should he be merciful about one thing and completely non-understanding and non-accepting about another? 

I used to have a lot of trouble with the Old Testament laws, but the thing is, those laws are intended for Jews living in Israel.  That's why today people eat shrimp and wear cotton/poly blended clothing.  The laws and rules of the Old Testament weren't designed to make us feel bad, they were designed to sanctify the Jews from the people around them.  The early church decided that gentile Christians didn't need to follow every letter of the law, only the spirit:

Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, mind, soul and strength.  This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like unto it: you shall love your neighbor as yourself.  On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. 

I hope you find the peace you're looking for. 
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bethzerosix

what wonderful replies.  :) it  really true that you cant trust your feelings of not being "right with god". of all the rules and laws the ones that god is most concerned with are love your neighbor and love god. we have a basic idea of how to love one another but what does it mean to love god... what is he looking for.

galatians 3
romans 3,4 and 5.

;)

love, beth
Set me as a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm: for love is strong as death; jealousy is cruel as the grave: the coals thereof are coals of fire, which hath a most vehement flame.
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Alyssa M.

Jessica, I'd add "Love your enemies" and "Love one another as I have loved you."

Beth, those are good references. I'd add 1 Cor. 13, specifically the part about putting away childish things.

Many people want rules, as though they are living under their parent's roof all their life. Jesus made his disciples take responsibility for their own lives, rather than replace their parent's law with God's law. I'm grown up enough to know that living abundantly (John 10:10) means living in the correct gender, and I'm grown up enough to know that failing to to that is what makes me wrong with God.

One other thing: God did not afflict me with being trans. God did not single me out to have particular suffering. Nor is it some special blessing in disguise. God gave me a life, and it's a pretty good one, just one that I have to work a bit harder than some others to live out fully. But I never deserved life in the first place. Who am I to complain that my life isn't quite as shiny as the next girl's?
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.

   - Anatole France
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Ms Jessica

Quote from: Alyssa M. on January 06, 2010, 01:15:58 AM
Jessica, I'd add "Love your enemies" and "Love one another as I have loved you."

I wouldn't quibble with that.  It was, after all, the point of the parable of the good Samaritan when Jesus was asked "Who is my neighbor?" 
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Nemo

I'm so glad I found this thread :) I've had a good feeling from the start that this was what God wants for me, especially when I think to the amount of times that Jesus has said he offers life in all its fullness, and the need for us to change and become more Christ-like, be prepared to offer sacrifices, endure suffering when it comes, etc.

I had my first run-in with a more traditionalist Christian today. I've told a couple of people about this now - the first was with a woman who gave me the great advice to just pray that God will take me where He wants me, and nowhere else. This guy though, accused me of leaving Jesus and following Satan, saying how man and woman were made to be in a relationship - can't remember all of it, but I knew that wasn't God speaking. Oh yes, and my personal favourite - which I've heard since being bi and wanting a girlfriend - "You just need a steady relationship with a man." Yeah, whatever mate, you believe what you like. I know what God's telling me; if you don't think that's Him that's up to you.

God may not change, but times do, and the bible reflects that. Like the vision Peter had about eating these animals that were forbidden to Jews. Why people in this day and age still cling to the archaic laws of Leviticus (well, okay, some of them are still valid), I'll never know.


New blog in progress - when I conquer my writer's block :P
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Ellieka

I think Julie Mari and Robin hit the nail right on the head. All the other post were excellent as well but The afore mentioned really echo what I feel.

God allowed me to go through this so that I could learn compassion, tolerance and patience. I used to just wish that I could make this all go away, find that magic pill that would just take away any gender confusion and leave me a normal person. But looking at my life now, I am thankful to have been created the way I am.

The struggle truly has given me strength. It reminds me of the butterfly. If it didn't have to fight to get out of it's cocoon then it would not gain the strength to spread it's wings and fly.

Keep the faith, brother. I'm praying for you.

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spacial

Quote from: The Original Cami on February 24, 2010, 03:54:46 PM
I am thankful to have been created the way I am.

Me too.

For all the problems I may have had, they have led me to what I am today.

Problems are part of the building blocks of our lives. If we're smart we use then to construct our future.
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rejennyrated

I would also like to add that if you believe in a God then logically you should presumably also believe that that God provided us the means of salvation, in this case the medical science that allows us to live the lives that we need to.

I personally would have a great diffculty believing in a sadistic God who created both a problem and it's potential medical solution but then forbade people to access that solution. I would always prefer to believe in a loving saviour than a twisted a tormentor.
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spacial

This is getting to be a habit, but I have to agree completely with rejennyrated.

The notion, in Christian culture, of arbitory prohibitions decreed by a god are nonsense and possibly hypocrtical.

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Nemo

Hey folks, sorry to interrupt but I've just been reading through the start of 1 Corinthians, and there's this awesome verse that really struck me - I'm sharing it here in the hope it makes us all feel better about our situation :)

QuoteHe (God) chose what the world looks down on and despises, and thinks is nothing, in order to destroy what the world thinks is important.
~ 1 Corinthians 1:28, Good News Bible

The bits before make comforting reading, too.


New blog in progress - when I conquer my writer's block :P
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Walter

That's a good verse, Nemo

As of late, I'm still feeling not right with God, but maybe through prayer (which I haven't done at all lately) and time, maybe God will somehow show me that He's alright with the way I am
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Ellieka

If you ever need some one to pray/talk with PM me. You don't have to go it alone.
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Walter

I will probably take you up on that offer, Cami. It would be nice to talk with someone during this
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tekla

If you believe the Bible, then you are made in the image and likeness of god.  If that's so, then you too are perfect.  Stop thinking and start doing.  Self-doubt is the devils greatest weapon.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Nemo

God intends to make us in His image - therefore perfect - but because the world we're born into is anything but, that leaves plenty of scope for things to go wrong. Things like Downs Syndrome, Asperger's, etc. (I think I saw this argument on here somewhere, actually), not to mention the whole "God intended us to be one gender yet we're born as another" problem we have.

Try weighing up the pros and cons of transition vs staying as-is, and see what you come up with. I've found the benefits of change just keep piling up, therefore proving to me that God is the one who wants to take me through this. The Devil's good at instilling fear, self-loathing etc. which would stop you going through with it, or wondering if God still loves you for it. Just remember that God loves everyone, no matter what, that should help :)


New blog in progress - when I conquer my writer's block :P
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Suzy

Contrary to tekla's theological debauchery, I am glad that, while perfection is always a goal, being a Christian does not mean that we are now on trial.  It means we are free to be ourselves, knowing that we will fail sometimes and that forgiveness has already been granted by Christ.   It means trusting that Christ was perfect for us, so we do not have to be.  It means loving Christ and wanting to do better.  It means forgiving ourselves and each other in the name of Christ.  It means we do not have to try to convince God to love us, warts and all.  God already showed that love in the ultimate way on the cross.  It means we have the Holy Spirit to begin changing us into the image of Christ.  It means we can realize the words of Hebrews 4:16.
"Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

Peace,
Kristi
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Terry

I am not one to post much  but...... I am happy to be trans because it give me the ability to see both sides of the gender thing. God did me a favor, and it has its ups and downs, while allowing me to see more than point of living in His world. Could anything be better than understanding how others think and react to different situations. Thanks to God my life is much fuller.
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spacial

Quote from: Kvall on February 28, 2010, 03:56:27 PM
Does disability exist in a perfect world? How about 'alternative' neurobiology? I think you should be careful when you oversimplify like that. Deaf culture is an example of why it's not so simple; many do not wish to hear. Better than a world where diversity does not exist, to me, would be one where diversity does not have to be a "disability" because all the people around you still lift you up and include you in society.

Since everything happens because of God's will, then all of these and many others are part of that perfection.

Because it may not seem perfect in our eyes, doesn't mean it isn't.

In a way, it's like the old question, why does God let bad things happen to good people?
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