So as the title states I started drinking less fluids during working hours so that I would  not have to use the toilet. Why? Because of a few comments when I had first come out. A few that led me to believe I belonged in neither toilet male or female. This never mothered me until I received a call today before lunch. My last check up and blood work showed that I have developed a UT infection. I haven't had to deal with this sort of thing since back before I moved out of group homes and campus life. It's really annoying, part of me fears losing my job so if it means holding it all day and skimping water well.. no more stares when I emerge from the female restroom and some customer who reads me as male walks past.

Truthfully it isn't the stares it's the comments from before...

 Is there a place near by you go run to that you feel more comfortable going? I undestand just how hard this can be but you are endangering your health something has to be done. I know its scary but try to talk to someone in managment about it. Its discrimanation and its dangrous for you. Your life is far more important then other peoples ignorance.

I hope things improve for you. Hold your head up!

Ethan

Quote from: natures.grace on January 20, 2010, 10:20:12 PM
Is there a place near by you go run to that you feel more comfortable going? I undestand just how hard this can be but you are endangering your health something has to be done. I know its scary but try to talk to someone in managment about it. Its discrimanation and its dangrous for you. Your life is far more important then other peoples ignorance.

I hope things improve for you. Hold your head up!

Ethan

We currently have two buildings both are used by the same people who made the comments. As for going higher (fixed typo) up I went to first my boss and the shop manager the manager is one who made a comment but it was supposedly worked out. I also had gone to HR who first meetings were okay with me transitioning on the job. Then my youtube vlog was seen by friends who work there of course some how my video was watched at work. After my hysto I returned to work with a notice to meet with HR and the company lawyer. There I was told that they had been told I had violated someones rights because they had clicked on links away from my videos. I was then told nothing was wrong with my videos but I should delete my account and tell no one about it including friends. I agreed then they dropped the "your status is not protected in this state bomb." So I don't think going to hire up will help me. It had been mentioned in passing of hiring a sensitivity speaker or something. But of course it never happened.

If breaks were longer I could walk over to the university but the closes restroom is  10 minutes away and that's with running on a 15 minute break I can't make it. I get the impression people are okay with me as long as I don't show out of box ideals to them.

Sorry for my winded posts.

I actaully had an issue where I got banned from using the restrooms at my job. I wasnt allowed to used them for about 5 weeks. I ended up leaving that job cuz it was just a pain to have to leave all the time and all. The reason why people found out about me is that my one boss told this person. It just sucks cuz of the closed minded people out there.

I second that. I can't stand this! Closed minded people make me SO mad. Like BLAZING mad. I feel so bad for you. I'd tell you to just leave the job but i know times are tough. For all I know you love the job and hate the people. again this really SUCKS for you. I'm really outspoken so i'd be taking it to the news or something but not a lot of people are like me. But remember NO job is worth your health NO JOB

I know just ten years in the place heck right out of school, not to mention I do like what I do. Lol I would say I love it but the machines sometimes act stupid so like it is.  Just people.. I can't really say if I would have rather had them snark at me from the get go instead of laying on. "We respect you as a person you do darn good work your record is clean. So we are willing to work with you." Then some hat decides to click links on youtube see a video that was not mine become offended and I of course am stuck holding my own until I can get home.

Did not notice the time I need to turn in. Thank you all for listening. Just grr normally I would turn the other cheek but being told the cause of having to take horse pills I needed to vent.

It's just so unfair. I just want to knock some sence into these people. People need to just mind there own buisness and let everyone live their lives, do whatever they want to do and stop judging. Its an impossable dream but man. I'd love to eraticate disscrimination.

Quote from: natures.grace on January 20, 2010, 11:03:37 PM
It's just so unfair. I just want to knock some sence into these people. People need to just mind there own buisness and let everyone live their lives, do whatever they want to do and stop judging. Its an impossable dream but man. I'd love to eraticate disscrimination.

So would I the least I can do is fight for others even though I allow myself to be treated bad. Anyway night all sleep well when you go.

You as well!

This is a tough one.  I think your company is out of line for suggesting, whether stated or implied, that you aren't welcome in either restroom.  I would not suggest limiting liquids if at all possible.  Dehydration is a very real thing.  I don't think you want to faint on the job and have your boss after you about that as well.

You mentioned taking short breaks.  What about a lunch break?  If the university is too far, is there a gas station or fast food restaurant nearby?  I mention those because they are used to people just coming in to use the bathroom and not buying anything.  If neither is available, you might just have to use the women's restroom at work until you are legally male.  Customers might give you looks, but it's better than having a painful UTI.

I'm not at all surprised you have a UTI.

If you carry on like this your next stage will be serious constipation or even kidney failure.

You must drink fluid.

You must use the toilet. Anyone preventing you from doing so is, I suggest, committing a serious assault.

If they insist upon you using a specific toilet then do so. They are trying to get to you. By giving in and not using the toilet you let them win.

Now, drink plenty of fluid. Use the toilet.

You must stand up for yourself.

OSHA requires that employees have access to toilet facilities.
Your employer is probably on safe legal ground if they insist that you use the facilities for your legal gender.
Of course they have to allow you to use one or the other.
The problem comes when their choice is not your choice.

Quote from: Renate on January 21, 2010, 07:32:20 AM
OSHA requires that employees have access to toilet facilities.
Your employer is probably on safe legal ground if they insist that you use the facilities for your legal gender.
Of course they have to allow you to use one or the other.
The problem comes when their choice is not your choice.

Well said. I think we should have LGBT sensitivity training for EVERY job. Rules protecting LGBT in EVERY job. At least in canada they give you the choise to be labled a minority. (women are listed in that catagory) they should have a little box for trans. canada's jobs always bost about being an equal oppurtunity employer. Yea well start living up to it canada. and to the states you need a face lift  lol

I all honesty, this is a little more serious than that.

If MuddyFrog continues with not taking adequate fluid, he's going to become very sick and may die.

he must stand up for himself.

I think that if your afriad to say anything, then go to a lawyer. Let them say it for you. Because your work may not listen or care what you have to say but a lawyer will make them listen. Would they rather that you held in it and got so sick that you could never work again, suied them for a lot of money or would they like to deal with it in a fasion where money and bad publicity is not thrown at them.

Please seek legal help you deserve to be treated better then this! Its for your health.

I'll like to offer and apology I have not been back to respond to anyone for a few days. Tasha I'm not sure how to pm anyone but I work for the state/university in Arkansas. Change is extremely slow here, I know I have a right to use a rest room. Just the comments or stares when and before I actually started to pass has made the current situation worst. I know I should have spoken up during the first hassle but at the time I had actually still been in the stage that I would lose my job. My support group kept pointing that this was a high possibility.

I just hate to have to go back to feeling like I'm a spy when using the ladies room and unsure in the mens room since I still have those who refuse to call me the correct pronouns. I did recently find out all the heads had had a meeting about my status told a few rules I don't know what they were but the odd questions from co-workers stopped. Most likely because they also passed around that anyone caught spreading gossip that slanders anyone will be fired with no warning other then this one.

Thank you all for your comments.

MuddyFrog

Thank you for getting back with the latest news.

I know everyone will agree with me when I say that this sounds a bit more positive. Though an entirely unacceptable sutuation will remain until these people learn to differentiate between your personal life and how well you do your job.

Hopefully Tasha can give you some more advice. Incidently, to PM someone, click on their name, which opens a new page, then click on the line Send Personal Message.

If you can, hope you will tell us how things are going for you.

Quote from: Tasha Elizabeth on January 24, 2010, 05:43:49 PM
muddy, check your pm's!

Thank you Tasha I received your message I see the doctor you mention as needed. I'm also thinking I have heard of the lawyer you mentioned through other channels but it has been a while. Thank you for the time and work to get me this information.