Okay, this is something that kind of bugs me. Whenever I meet someone either whom I have known from my past and is just finding out about me or someone new, who can see that I am trans and wishes to talk about me being trans; inevitably, they say something to the effect, "well, as long as you're happy". I've just about reached the point in which that really ticks me off and I'll tell you why.
It took me a little while to work this over in my head (dense as it is) and understand why the phrase irritates me so. I used to feel, when I heard it said, who ever it was had some level of support for me and my need to transition. And, honestly, some people do genuinely have that feeling. But, for others it is just a way to avoid accepting it themselves. Yet, this in and of itself isn't what I've come to have displeasure over either. The real reason is, they just don't get it! None of them! These people continue to think that I made a "choice" to transition. And that by doing so, they hope I'm happy! Transitioning isn't only about making yourself happy. Heck, truth be known, most of my life prior to transitioning, I was pretty happy with. With that, most everything that I do these days is very much the same as it was prior to transitioning and I am still as happy as I was before!
What I now inform those that wish to discuss my transition and make the assumption "as long as you're happy" is:
"I am happy, was happy and will continue to be happy. And what you need to understand is the following: I transitioned because a). I had to, and b). I needed to feel RIGHT about and with myself. and c). I had to! Transitioning really didn't have anything to do with being happy!"
Does it make a difference in the way they see it? Yeah, sometimes. Still, occasionally someone ends the conversation with, "good, I'm glad you're happy". AAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!
How do the rest of you feel about this?
Dawn