So I had therapy on thursday, and my therapist suggested that since I'm getting a new job, that this would be the perfect opprotunity to start using Davis instead of my female name and using male pronouns and using the men's bathroom at my new place of work.

I am all for this, but I have an interview on tuesday, and when they call me should I be like "I go by Davis and would like it if you used male pronouns" or what? I'm kinda nervous/excited by all of this. So I'm over thinking things, but it's a huge step.

Also just a fashion side note, for the interview it's business dress. I got slacks and an excellent dress shirt, but should I get a blazer, or is just the shirt and slacks good enough? I'm interviewing for a bank if that helps anything.

-Davis

Quote from: DavisJ86 on February 13, 2010, 05:32:38 PM
So I had therapy on thursday, and my therapist suggested that since I'm getting a new job, that this would be the perfect opprotunity to start using Davis instead of my female name and using male pronouns and using the men's bathroom at my new place of work.

I am all for this, but I have an interview on tuesday, and when they call me should I be like "I go by Davis and would like it if you used male pronouns" or what? I'm kinda nervous/excited by all of this. So I'm over thinking things, but it's a huge step.

Also just a fashion side note, for the interview it's business dress. I got slacks and an excellent dress shirt, but should I get a blazer, or is just the shirt and slacks good enough? I'm interviewing for a bank if that helps anything.

-Davis

Ideally, yes. Start off by being absolutely honest with who you are.

Reality, it depends on the job, the company and the area.

well it TD Bank and I'm in Mass., and the company has gender identity/expression written in the discrimination policy. I'm just nervous the interviwer will be a jerk.

For an interview you should wear the clothes they would expect you to work in.  They should be clean and neat.  It usually doesn't hurt to overdress a bit.  If you can get a decent blazer, I would do that.  For Massachusetts I would wear a tie.

[BIG FAT CAVEAT: The last time I applied for a job in Massachusetts (at a bank, actually) was in 1973.  It was more conservative in dress than many places at the time - it's near Connecticut, after all.  I'm sure things have changed, but the dress code may still be more conservative than Texas or California.]

Tekla's advice on another thread was excellent.  Go ahead of time and see what the men there are wearing, then dress accordingly.  You don't want to be very much overdressed, but you want to look like you put some effort into your appearance and that the job is important to you.

Good luck on the interview.

- Kate

Thanks K8,the position itself is a call center rep for the bank. So I think I'll go with the blazer, but forgo the tie. IDK *face palm* Plus the shirt came with a clip on tie and I find those quite awkward.

Kind of an after thought here, but I'm to bring my resume and my current resume has my female name on it. So should I change it or keep it as is?

Clip-on ties are horrid.  Don't ever wear one!

I would change the resume to use your current name - Davis.  Somewhere along the line - in the application or in the interview - you will have to mention that your references are under *oldname*.

On a general note, I have found that if I treat my transition as just something normal, most people will treat it that way too.

Knock'em dead, Davis!

- Kate

I think a simple, "Call me Davis" when you shake hands is enough to start with. You can explain more after sitting in the interview or after it.

I think you should wear a tie. Anything as corporate as a bank you should look as business-like as you can. You are trying to sell yourself, it is worth dressing up. I think you should look slightly more formal than what you would wear everyday at work I reckon (unless that is as formal as can be)

Nothing makes a man feel important, like a crisp suit. Except a ->-bleeped-<- from your secretary in your BMW.

Wait. I mean, embrace it. Your looks should kill, so the other candidates are dead on arrival.

I got a suit, but the shirt is giving me troubles cause my neck isn't an average size. So I'm thinking a tie will help with the gap between my neck and the shirt. I got a boys size 16 shirt. Other than the neck issue the shirt fits perfectly.

Other than that, I'm going to grab the balls that I don't have, and own that interview. Thanks everyone.

Good luck. I just went through a crazy interview process for a job, 4 interviews total, I ended up going with a tie but no jacket and it all went well. On a daily basis I can wear khakis or slacks and a nice button up shirt. If a client is coming to the office I will wear a tie.
I would definitely tell them you go by Davis right off the bat. I have not revealed my prior name as of yet to my employer, I start on the 22nd. If they ask I will just say  "yes that was my previous name" and move on with the conversation.
Cheers,
Myles