As I move closer to my surgery date, my mind races with a lot of what ifs.  A few nights ago as I lay in bed, my inquisitive mind got the better of me.  I began thinking where exactly will the dissection of the neo-vagina be created.  As I began examining myself down there, I kind of started to freak out a little as all I could feel was hard, bony features beneath my skin.  The only reasonably soft tissue I feel is the perineum area slightly above the rectum--I can actually push on this area and into my body but, immediately to the left and right of that area are more bony structures.  I'm thinking if this is the dissection area, how the heck am I going to fit a dilator into that area?!?!?  I don't see how that area can stretch enough to accommodate a large diameter.

Is this indeed the area where the neo-vagina is created, or am I missing something here?  My mind races with crazy thoughts like, maybe I'm some sort of anomaly who's pelvic bones are all fused together down there and I will only end up with a vulva!!!  Could someone shed some light on this topic, please?  I know I'm probably being a little irrational, but this is how my crazy mind works!

It's there but the corpora cavernosae blocks a good amount of the space from being examined preop digitally (with fingers).

(MRI side view to show better)

Quote from: FlanHusky on April 19, 2010, 02:22:13 PM
It's there but the corpora cavernosae blocks a good amount of the space from being examined preop digitally (with fingers).

Thanks Flan!  You're a life saver!  I've been scouring the web, studying various pelvic anatomy shots only to come up with nothing.  That MRI really puts things into perspective for me--never realized that the bladder was so huge!   The space between the rectum and where the neo-vagina sits is approximately the distance I measured with my fingers where the spongy tissue is on my body--give or take a little.

Relieved for now, but I'm sure I'll find something else to freak out over as time goes by

The more you see the counter going down and down the more scary it is. I know for me it's like that. I'm scared and nervous, excited too.

Quote from: MsGiselle on April 20, 2010, 01:01:59 PM
The more you see the counter going down and down the more scary it is. I know for me it's like that. I'm scared and nervous, excited too.

This may sound crazy, but I'm more scared of going off hormones for three weeks than the actual surgery--at least for now.  We'll see what transpires as time goes by.

Quote from: Kristyn on April 20, 2010, 02:49:02 PM
This may sound crazy, but I'm more scared of going off hormones for three weeks than the actual surgery--at least for now.  We'll see what transpires as time goes by.

Yeah I know. I'm more scared that I finally have the body i want. Very curvy and I'm scared bein off Hormones is gotta make everything go back. That and i heard your depression can get worse not bein on it.

Quote from: MsGiselle on April 20, 2010, 02:54:22 PM

Yeah I know. I'm more scared that I finally have the body i want. Very curvy and I'm scared bein off Hormones is gotta make everything go back. That and i heard your depression can get worse not bein on it.

Most say the change is not that dramatic, but what I might do is increase my intake of foods with phytoestrogens--naturally occurring plant estrogens.  Herbals are not recommended as they could interact with the anesthesia.

Quote from: Kristyn on April 20, 2010, 03:04:35 PM
Most say the change is not that dramatic, but what I might do is increase my intake of foods with phytoestrogens--naturally occurring plant estrogens.  Herbals are not recommended as they could interact with the anesthesia.

I will be there to huggers you kristyn!! Don't feel down or scared or even shy, Ill force a hug out of you unless your one of those people who don't like to be touched.

Quote from: SaraR on April 20, 2010, 09:08:09 PM
I will be there to huggers you kristyn!! Don't feel down or scared or even shy, Ill force a hug out of you unless your one of those people who don't like to be touched.

You, my girl are such a sweetheart!!!

Quote from: Kristyn on April 20, 2010, 09:14:52 PM
You, my girl are such a sweetheart!!!

So I've been told !

Going through the information and instructions I was sent from my surgeon, I noticed that I'll only have to suspend the estrogen for 2 weeks, and I can actually continue the spiro right up until the day before surgery. Whew! I was deathly afraid of letting that poison back into my system, like it would somehow manage to talk me out of it or something lol

the things we worry about as the time gets closer.... 

Quote from: FairyGirl on April 20, 2010, 09:45:22 PM
Going through the information and instructions I was sent from my surgeon, I noticed that I'll only have to suspend the estrogen for 2 weeks, and I can actually continue the spiro right up until the day before surgery. Whew! I was deathly afraid of letting that poison back into my system, like it would somehow manage to talk me out of it or something lol

the things we worry about as the time gets closer.... 

If your afraid of the poison factories, just go to police station and you would like to be there test dummy to shoot a stun gun in your groin area. It will keep the area numb for 2 weeks or so lol

  no worries, they know their days are numbered 

I was totally nervous about going of hormones for three weeks as well, but glad I can keep taking spiro until the day before. I'm on three days without hormones, so far so good. I haven't noticed anything significant yet, although I have had the stomach flu the last couple of days so I was already feeling bad. Of course the good thing about going off estrogen is that I am less than three weeks away from my big day now, so that helps.

omg I didn't realize you were having your surgery with Dr. McGinn! You must tell us all about it. I'll be seeing her on June 21. With all these Brassard girls here I was beginning to feel left out lol

My pre-surgery instructions only said 2 weeks off though, not three. Is there any particular reason for the extra week off?

Quote from: FairyGirl on April 21, 2010, 10:09:40 PM
omg I didn't realize you were having your surgery with Dr. McGinn! You must tell us all about it. I'll be seeing her on June 21. With all these Brassard girls here I was beginning to feel left out lol

My pre-surgery instructions only said 2 weeks off though, not three. Is there any particular reason for the extra week off?

I believe K8 is having hers with Dr. McGinn in two days

I think Kate is going with Marci Bowers, but I'm sure we will hear soon

Quote from: FairyGirl on April 21, 2010, 10:09:40 PM
omg I didn't realize you were having your surgery with Dr. McGinn! You must tell us all about it. I'll be seeing her on June 21. With all these Brassard girls here I was beginning to feel left out lol

My pre-surgery instructions only said 2 weeks off though, not three. Is there any particular reason for the extra week off?

You're right that she does say two weeks in her instructions, but in my last conversation with her she said that she prefers stopping three weeks before. I figured as long as I'm able to keep the evil poison "T" at bay with spiro, and extra week off of E wouldn't hurt. I'll be sure to share my experience once I able to.

Quote from: FairyGirl on April 21, 2010, 10:09:40 PM
My pre-surgery instructions only said 2 weeks off though, not three. Is there any particular reason for the extra week off?

2 weeks here too, I believe the reason is an outdated view of thrombotic effects estrogen has on bed bound patients, although for E delivered via IM injection, the extra week is worth it since it doesn't clear as fast as via oral.

Can I just inject here that I had BOTH my surgeries without ever coming off estrogen.

I am ABSOLUTELY NOT reccomending that anyone ignores their doctor's advice - but as Flanhusky said it really is just a question of some doctors wanting to be more cautious about the potential effects of estrogen on thrombotic events.

I'm sure it must be a trying thing to have to do, and I'm glad I never had to, but I'm sure you will all come through it ok.