Hi there, these intro post always make me nervous, I never know what to say or if I'm saying too much or too little. I guess the basics are I am FTM transgender and gay, both of which I am completely comfortable with. I decided to transition last summer, however it first came up when I was 16 but I couldn't move ahead with it at the time because I was just starting out on my own with no money or support.
I lived as a straight female until last summer, but I've always been fairly androgynous. Now I'm 28 and feel like I wasted too much time, and worry that I'm a fraud for taking so long. Since my decision I've been working on "passing" and getting those close to me to accept my preferred gender. My husband is having a hard time with it because we also decided to separate so I can start the life I've always wanted, and also because he's not gay.
I started seeing a therapist last week and I'm glad that he accepted to used my male name, it was exciting to hear for the first time. My main goal with him is guidance on starting HRT. I'm frustrated with the time it's taking to start T and I hope it happens soon and without too much hassle. I also see another counselor for depression, anxiety and social phobia which I hope will lessen when I transition
I'm excited about my transition and being who I've wanted to be for so long, and for a new life where I hope to be more confident and less isolated. But I'm stressed about the changes regarding the divorce and starting my life over once again from the ground up. I have no choice than to go ahead with it, I can't spend the rest of my life trapped like this.
That's about it, I'm just looking for people to talk to and learn from. I have been doing research for several months and might have something to offer you guys too.
