Well all, its been awile. 

I am now out at my place of work, and everyone seemed to shrug their shoulders and move on. This worries me for when I actually go to work as Elissa (tonight) and they see me in all my (or not  ) beauty.

So now i'm working on my apperence but also on my voice. Since I no longer can take lessons from the university I was in DC, does anyone have a link to a chicago teacher who works with trans or a very good DVD? Trying to track down one or both if possible.

Thanks all, and wish me luck for tonight.

At my work place upon coming out, I had the same reaction.  Let me tell you that this is the best hoped for reaction.  Nobody showed any disrespect and it went very smoothly.  I immediately went there wearing whatever I liked.  I didn't bother to ease into it and I didn't take any time off.  I have only had a couple people get pronouns wrong when they weren't thinking (they are usually pretty consistent with the correct ones) and they quickly corrected themselves.

Melissa

Good Luck and make sure you let us know how it went and all the details

I live in the Chicago area and looked up a voice teacher once...I found one person that I actually knew, a freind of a freind, who offered voice lessons, but she mainly dealt with rehabilitation for those who had surgery of the throat or who had had damage to the throat area, or ever neurlogical damage to the speech center o fthe brain. I'm not sure if she does voice training for transgendered peoples though.

but here's a link to a DVD u can order that might help.
http://www.heartcorps.com/journeys/voice.htm

Listen to the sample download...this girl (who is TG) has a wonderful voice..and she developed her own technique to achieve the desire effects.

Well, it seems that my first night at work went off without a hitch! Everyone is having trouble with getting my name right, mostly since it seems that I forgot to tell everyone what my new name was. *Shakes her head*

The residents all seemed to be ok with it, as much as they could tell who I was at least. The only thing that seemed to go wrong was that a few of the girls were alittle cold, but i'll give them time to get used to me coming in as a girl. Same with using my real name and the right pronouns.

This night has been a real rush, and now i'm sitting in my favorite cafe getting ready to go give blood still dressed. Tomarrow I go to school as Elissa too, that will most likely be a long day. So continue to wish me luck, and hopefully after tomarrow I will have a decent picture to post. 

Quote from: Elissa on October 25, 2006, 07:01:01 AM
Well, it seems that my first night at work went off without a hitch! Everyone is having trouble with getting my name right, mostly since it seems that I forgot to tell everyone what my new name was. *Shakes her head*

The residents all seemed to be ok with it, as much as they could tell who I was at least. The only thing that seemed to go wrong was that a few of the girls were alittle cold, but i'll give them time to get used to me coming in as a girl. Same with using my real name and the right pronouns.

This night has been a real rush, and now i'm sitting in my favorite cafe getting ready to go give blood still dressed. Tomarrow I go to school as Elissa too, that will most likely be a long day. So continue to wish me luck, and hopefully after tomarrow I will have a decent picture to post. 

Hello Elissa.

The reactions you are experiencing are quite normal, if there is such a thing as normal in this thing of ours.  Here is an excerpt from our Wiki article that I put up, that deals with coming out at the workplace.  The complete article can be found here:

https://www.susans.org/wiki/A_Guide_to_Coming_Out_at_the_Workplace

QuoteSocial Implications. The societal implications of your transition will affect those who you work with differently. There are many variables that shape the workforce and it's social attitudes. Being employed in an area where religion and right wing or conservative thinking prevails may affect you differently compared to one who is employed in a more liberal minded society. Knowing the general attitudes towards the GLBT communities and issues in your locale will serve as a measure to gauge reaction at work.
For the FtM, coworkers will react based on their relationship to you. For example as a woman, a male colleague may have been attracted to you and may have even flirted with you but with you as a male he may be caused to now re-evaluate his own sexuality, that in turn may lead to hostility and denial towards you. Similarly, your new male colleges may test your loyalty to their group with off color jokes, innuendos, sexual comments directed at their female colleagues to gauge your reaction. Not being one of the guys can lead to exclusion. Females may see your transition as a betrayal, as a way of getting ahead, getting more money or a promotion, jumping the line so to speak.
Similarly, MtF could experience reactions from her new female colleagues. Again a female employee may have thought you a very attractive male, and may have had thoughts of a relationship, or as with the FtM situation, may have flirted with you. There will be women who will think that your transition is just away of invading their world, that you have ulterior motives. Some women may even respect and be flattered that a man would want to relinquish all his "male" advantages to become a woman.
Both groups will have members who will just not want anything to do with you regardless of which way you are transitioning. You have been privy to and been included in private group activity and views that you are now taking over to, and revealing to the "other side".

Hope this sheds some light on these issues for you.

Steph

...well its been a few days and I am cooled down enough to post this. Ladies and gents, I have been fired. Details to follow.

Basically everything on my second night out on the job was going smoothly untill about 200 in the morn. I was watching tv in the lobby as there were no pages and the laundry was still running. Drinking my coke and probably zoned, my manager comes over and nuges me telling me there was a page. I hadn't felt it, but considereing the shape our pages are in that wasn't unusual, part of the reason both care givers hang out at night was so we didn't miss pages. Anyways after I check on the resident who was getting into his bed and wanted help after I had shown up, (he had paged by accident I guess...twice ) my manager says I was sleeping and would have to report it to my boss. The events after that was that we ended up calling my boss at 230 in the morn and she fired me over the phone. Oh, and there was no proof of me sleeping.

I don't know but in my mind if you take the second day being out on the job and add that to being fired on the first offense without proof or documentation, that adds up to at the very least suspicious circumstances. I am pursuing legal avanues and currently trying to get on unemployment starting monday. I will update as I find out more.

Fabulous!  I said this before i am not transitioning but i would be terrified!  Especially where i work now i fear a job change would been in my future to do this, I have too many snakes in the grass at work and back stabbers who would use anything to destroy who or what i am!
Best wishes and luck!
R

It seems to me that the discrimination is obvious!  They apparently manufactured an excuse to get rid of you as soon as they could.  Please DO pursue your legal options and let us know.  This blatent abuse from your employer deserves to be recognized and punished! 

I hope you're successful getting unemployment, too.  Not getting it would add insult to injury.

Hugs & Smiles,
helen

Ouch!  I'm sorry.  Although discrimination does sound probable, it's all circumstantial, so I don't know how well it would go over legally.  I mean did they say you were doing an excellent job before?  Also, when you say "zoned", do you mean you were entranced in the show, or you were half asleep like a zombie?  You mention there being no proof, but were you sleeping?  Perhaps I'm just a little confused.

Melissa

I was awake, and I don't remember nodding off. Afterall I had three things to keep me awake:

1.LEad supervisor was working with me that night.
2.Second day out on the job and I was still a bundle of nerves.
3.The forms and padding were alittle...unconfterble.

And when I 'zone' it means that I become kinda focused solely on the tv or whatever. Usually the pagers snap me out of it but the pagers are all in a VERY sad shape. Missing parts and in some cases held together with scotch tape.

Also I DID accept that I was sleeping at first, because I trusted my supervisor. The same woman who was assuring me that I was doing a very good job and would protect me from any discrimination. The same woman who apparently on on the first offense finds it necissary to call the boss in the middle of the night.

Supposedly I have a case, but right now i;m just trying to survive.

Quote from: Elissa on October 30, 2006, 08:24:10 AM
Supposedly I have a case, but right now i;m just trying to survive.

Ah, ok.  I understand now.  I also understand survival.  That really is a most inopportune time to lose a job.  When I came out, I was willing to search for new work if necessary, but I still would have been a bundle of nerves.  Good luck with the case and finding a new job.

Melissa

that's bad , such a downer!  I do not even dress and worry that my "secret" would still be the ruin of me at work  Sad enoguh we have to live under the pressures from our jobs in the first place then to have to harbor the additional burden of having a situation all to ourselves that society is too quick to turn on and judge! Ugghhhh

Any new news, Elissa? I wish you a continuing "good luck" with whatever legal avenues you are pursuing, as well as trying to survive.

Thanks for the support, but i'm still in the dark, and what I have heard hasn't been encouraging.

Basically the corperation found my firing to be with cause, big suprise. My lawyer says that since on outward apperences they were doing everything they should, the only thing I have to really argue is the timing of the incident itself. Its not hopeless, but it isn't a slam dunk either. So the ACLU is transfering my case to a more suited lawyer for review.

So basically this is going to be a very long haul. In the while I hope to get a job with my emt-b license that I hope to reaquire by year's end. In fact I might have a hospital that might hire me as their staff was impressed at my enthusiasm and experience.*crosses her fingers* Hopefully this won't end up as a repeat.

Quote from: Elissa on November 13, 2006, 10:23:46 AM
My lawyer says that since on outward apperences they were doing everything they should, the only thing I have to really argue is the timing of the incident itself. Its not hopeless, but it isn't a slam dunk either.

Yeah, that's pretty much what I was saying.  A slam dunker is when you have a shining employee review and then upon coming out get fired immediately.

Melissa

Quote from: Melissa on November 13, 2006, 11:50:11 AM

Quote from: Elissa on November 13, 2006, 10:23:46 AM
My lawyer says that since on outward apperences they were doing everything they should, the only thing I have to really argue is the timing of the incident itself. Its not hopeless, but it isn't a slam dunk either.

Yeah, that's pretty much what I was saying.  A slam dunker is when you have a shining employee review and then upon coming out get fired immediately.

Melissa

But I thought she said her boss was very happy with her performance before switching at work?

I just really, really hope you get some justice with this, Elissa.

Quote from: Elaine on November 14, 2006, 11:04:15 PM
But I thought she said her boss was very happy with her performance before switching at work?

I just really, really hope you get some justice with this, Elissa.

I mean she would have needed documented proof such as a written performance review.  A verbal "well done" is not evidence in court (unless maybe it were recorded, but that would look suspicious).  I originally had plans to time my "coming out" right after a good performance review, but I came out earlier and it all worked out.

Melissa

Quote from: Elaine on November 14, 2006, 11:04:15 PM
But I thought she said her boss was very happy with her performance before switching at work?
I just really, really hope you get some justice with this, Elissa.

She's been accused of sleeping on the job, assuming its a written policy and not just a rule of thumb, etc its been referred to as a "terminal offense" as in zero tolerance and all the good reviews in the world aren't going to stop you from being fired.

And its all perfectly legal.

Argh!

Well, it turns out that the corporation investigative team decided not to call me, and had my former boss do it instead. All that she would tell me was that the supivisor and corrdinatior's accounts stand as proof that I was sleeping. What?! First it took them 12+ days to come to this conclusion, and then they turn around and say that because I addmited it over the phone that I had been caught sleeping, which was to say that someone was accusing me of sleeping , that this is now solid proof? So perfomence issues suddely came up, which I had recieved when I was still new to my job, but no writeups.

I should have come in in person to talk to them, I should have had my lawyer listen to the conversation. These underhanded tricks these corperations play are really getting on my nerves. Oh, and yes there is a zero tolorence to sleeping, which is probably why I got that charge.

*sighs* Top it off, still no job.