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Yea 4 me !!! I made my first step.

Started by FLAddisonsHell, May 04, 2010, 07:39:52 PM

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FLAddisonsHell

May 04, 2010, 07:39:52 PM
HI everyone ! As of Friday 4/30/10 I finally decided to stop fighting with myself and go and get my general lab work up done.

Although I did want to get my labs done for more than this reason. My mother has a slight issue with her thyroid as does my aunt and others in my family. I have always known to the core that I wasnt exactly the same as everyone else and have always felt I was in the wrong body.

To this day I still cant look at myself in the mirror without wanting to cry. I have major issues with my self image. Ironically, I have really made a strong effort to try and conform to my anatomical sex, But it still feels like wearing your shoes on the wrong feet. I have been married 13 years now and am trying to be a father to a 16 year old headstrong like a mule gurl. I am so tired and exhausted I just dont know how to handle myself. No matter how hard I try to force this role I have an equally opposing force almost twice as strong telling me .. This is a joke .... when will you deal with yourself and realize that you need to do something...

:icon_blahblah:The very person I am married to: the person that is to except you for better or worse is trying to systematiclly dismantle my female persona. All I hear from her is " There is NOTHING feme about you" Which cuts me to the very core of my soul. I need support! not ridicule and shame. Im in school now full time,working full time and trying to juggle to many things most ppl would say. I hope you can forgive me for all the whining. Other than that ... Im really glad to be here ... and have already benefitted from reading others with the same circumstances. My aunt says I have to find a beginning b4 I can find the end. I thinks she's absolutly right.
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Jasmine.m

#1
May 04, 2010, 07:59:42 PM
hi. :icon_wave:

Welcome to susans. You're among kindred spirits.
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Janet_Girl

#2
May 04, 2010, 08:51:19 PM
Hi FLAddisonsHell, :icon_wave:

Welcome to our little family. Over 4600 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister. :icon_hug:

And be sure to check out these links ( MUST READS )

Hugs and Love,
Janet
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cynthialee

#3
May 04, 2010, 09:19:11 PM
Welcome aboard. Your narative sounds very similar to many of the late in life crowd. Tried to 'make yourself into a man'...? Yeap been down that road. Even the Army wasnt able to make a man of me.
This is a good place with alot of people who are of all age groups and gender expressions. That provides for alot of diferant outlooks and perspectives.
Hang around, we tend to treat eachother like family, and honestly we all need as much family as we can get.
Hugz
Cynthia Lee
So it is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you can win a hundred battles without a single loss.
If you only know yourself, but not your opponent, you may win or may lose.
If you know neither yourself nor your enemy, you will always endanger yourself.
Sun Tsu 'The art of War'
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