8 years since I started feeling weird and started crossdressing.

2 months since finally realizing who I was.

7 weeks since telling my mother about my crossdressing...and 7 weeks since she last touched me affectionately.

6 weeks since asking my mother for a therapist

4 weeks since the first session...and my mother finding out that I want to be female.

3 weeks since I last had a conversation with my father of more than two words.



You stand there and say that you love me but I know it is a lie. You think it is just a "phase" and that I will forget about it. Did the last 8 years of you trying to make me stop crossdressing not tell you anything? You deny me the help I need in the hopes of "protecting me from society" and giving me a chance to "change my mind". I don't need to be "protected from society" and I can't "change my mind". This was never my choice to begin with.

Can you imagine what it feels like to be trapped? What it is like to know that you can never escape that entrapment on your own? Then why do you want to keep me within this cage? If you know how it feels to be trapped, why would you not help your own CHILD to escape it. I want to escape this prison of a body and I know that I cannot do it on my own. Do you know that it hurts when you won't help me? Do you really hurt someone that you love? Or did you only love me when I was "normal"?

I guess I only want you to tell me the truth. Did you ever love me? Or was it all a lie?

It takes time, they have thought of you as their son. They need to accept you as their daughter.  Remember you know who you are. They just thought they did.

Hang in darling
Cindy

Stay strong, you have worked out who you are, they are still feeling like someone switched babies at the hospital.
They will get over the shock eventually, they are probably blaming themselves, and scared for you too.

Well, I was hugged today....but not out of love. My mother hugged me and cried with me as we learned that one of our dearest friends, Pastor Mark Weaver, will be taken off of life support tomorrow. Life really sucks.

Just don't do like I did...
Don't let hate and angry consume you, trust me it hurts to much