Okay my parents were out of town and were not supposed to arrive back home until saturday or friday night. But for some reason they decided to come back tonight and will be back around midnight.

The problem:
Last night I ordered a packer from good vibrations with overnight shipping thinking it would be here today. But it just got processed and it won't be here until tomorrow morning!! <not allowed>

What are some excuses to give them not to open a package that I am receiving??? Also it is under a different name (not mine). I would be dead if my mom or dad opened the package and pulled out fake flaccid penis

*edit* I'm waiting for the fedex confirmation code to see if I can reroute the package but I don't think they will let me!!

uhh maybe you could say its a friends who needed it delivering else where? that would make up for them not opening it either...maybe..

Intercept it before they even see it? Meet the fedex guy at the curb? Say it's your friend's?

Ill be in school during the estimated time ~ 8 30 - 10 30.

If I said it was for a friend what would I say that it is? (its coming in a box)

It's possible it won't get there until later that afternoon.  But if it does get there earlier, tell them that morning you're expecting a package for a friend, to please not open it, and set it on your bed/table/wherever when it arrives.  Act like it's no big deal and it won't be.

As for what's it in it, I don't know what your typical friends' interests would be.  Just make something up that seems plausible with the type of friends you have and that would be small enough to fit in the box.

Saying that it's for a friend prevents them from refusing the package or opening it. Definitely do that. In a way, it's true. And if you know that you are not outright lying, you'll be more convincing.

If they ask you what it is, don't say that you don't know; say that you didn't ask. That's true enough; you didn't ask because you already knew. But if they want to know why your friend asked you to accept the package, you could say that he or she was embarrassed to receive it at home.

Is it a guy's name on the package? What if it's a penis enlarger? That would cover your butt!

Seriously, if they are convinced that you know, you might have to make something up. If it's a guy's name on the package, I guess you might be able to say that it's condoms or something. If it's a girl's name, it's over-the-counter medication for a yeast infection. The best thing is for it to be something legal, plausible, and somewhat embarrassing to buy in person.

Or you could be almost totally honest and say that you have a "female" friend with gender issues, etc. This approach would also let you test the waters about trans issues if you've never brought them up before.

It is a guys name of the package, I will probably fake sick or something of that nature. They will surely believe me seeing as I hate missing school

Also thanks for all of the tips so far I have:
Say it's for a friend.
Try to reroute it.
Fake sick.
Ask to stay home to bond with siblings (they went out of town to pick them up)

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Post Merge: May 14, 2010, 03:33:52 PM

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So I faked sick and intercepted the package =] Yay