**WARNING: Bad sentences... not very good at writing...**

  I am FTM but I do not openly say that I am. Is that wrong? I address myself as male and gay, but I feel that I am shunned when I wear pink/cute clothing [the stereotypical things].  I feel deep down people say, "You are a girl claiming to be male and gay, dressing as a girl? You are one messed up kid."  This just hurts me. Though I do not care if I act this way, I am happy as male and gay, but I feel that Society will eat me up with their words....

  Sorry, to start off in such a depressing topic...   I am new and I've just started!! I really hope to get along with all the people here!! :] 

First, your writing is fine.

Second, Whether or not you openly say you are FTM is totally up to you. It is not wrong or right. The words people say bother us but a person can control how badly they bother  onesself. If you are happy with your decision and hurting no one, then do it. As with any decision, you deal with the consequences.

I think you will fit in just fine.

You wish to be a girly lil gay boy? That's perfectly fine isnt it? Nothing mentally wrong with wanting to be a specific kind of person, and being a girly boy who is gay is perfectly normal - theres plenty of them in this world we are all different and you shouldn't have to be made to feel inferior, bro

Would they rather you be a serial killer? People should mind their own business! As long as you are happy, who cares.

I've actually met a few "femmy" gay boy FTMs. They're incredibly happy and content people. Be you, however you define yourself.