Anyone else tend to react defensively to phrases that were intended to be innocent, but come across as demeaning to you? 

This morning I was out at my Cousins family's Lake house, helping put a dock in the water.  After standing around for a while, holding bolts and handing my brother and 2 male cousins wrenches, I finally offered to start carrying the wooden top peices down from the house.  My cousin looks at me skeptically for a second, and finally comments that they are pretty heavy and awkward, and "I don't know if you can handle it". 

Immediately I get defensive and insist that I can do it, and storm off to prove him wrong.  Turns out that he was right, and they are pretty heavy and awkward, and my other cousin struggled to carry them just as much as I did. I almost immediately regretted trying to move them on my own, and realized I was likely to hurt myself in the process, but I did it, and the look of surprise on my cousins face when he saw me coming down the stairs with it was totally worth it.

Anything that implies that I'm female. Isn't meant to insult me, but it definitely does.

Anything along the lines of "when you become a boy", or "so they think you're a boy?" Anything implying that I'm not male, or I'm trying to become something that I'm not already.

Oh, and of course: "You know, you want to be a guy because not one now. You're a woman."

That irritates me. It bothers me to be told I want to be male. Probably just because it implies I'm female.

"Let me get that."
"Smile!"
"....for a girl."

My oldest sister has taken to telling me every time she calls me now that I'll "always be her little girl"

and I'm like yeah, thanks, that's not as comforting and nice as you think it is. She insists on saying it no matter how many times I ask her not to.

Quote from: Jeatyn on May 30, 2010, 03:27:02 PM
My oldest sister has taken to telling me every time she calls me now that I'll "always be her little girl"

and I'm like yeah, thanks, that's not as comforting and nice as you think it is. She insists on saying it no matter how many times I ask her not to.

Same. Except it's my Dad, and he always calls me Princess which I absolutely can't stand. I've told him this but he still says it.

Quote from: Addison on May 30, 2010, 05:10:26 PM
Same. Except it's my Dad, and he always calls me Princess which I absolutely can't stand. I've told him this but he still says it.

My bio-dad calls me 'sweetie' and I hate it. I'm glad I don't talk to him anymore.

BTW, GSP FTW.

Quote from: Addison on May 30, 2010, 05:10:26 PM
Same. Except it's my Dad, and he always calls me Princess which I absolutely can't stand. I've told him this but he still says it.

My dad is JUST like that. He calls me 'baby' and 'puppy' and 'kitten' and it's so awkward and irritating.
And my mum.. well, whenever she says that 'she supports my decision, no matter what I am' she still always refers to me as 'she' and 'her' and 'her daughter'.

Funnily enough mine is only indirectly related to gender.

For me the first thing that comes to mine is any sentence about me ending in "not normal".

It's just that I've been told I'm "not normal" and that what I've suffered in life was 'my fault' because I'm "not normal" my entire life by my parent. That it does tend to set me off pretty easily.

Quote from: Berren on May 30, 2010, 05:17:27 PM
My dad is JUST like that. He calls me 'baby' and 'puppy' and 'kitten' and it's so awkward and irritating.
And my mum.. well, whenever she says that 'she supports my decision, no matter what I am' she still always refers to me as 'she' and 'her' and 'her daughter'.

man, I am so glad my dad has never given me any girly nicknames like that.

Quote from: Lachlann on May 30, 2010, 05:12:20 PMBTW, GSP FTW.

He's amazing.

Quote from: Elijah on May 30, 2010, 05:19:54 PM
man, I am so glad my dad has never given me any girly nicknames like that.

You are so lucky. When I tell me dad not to call me those names he kinda just shrugs or just plain says 'no'. *siiigh*

Quote from: Elijah on May 30, 2010, 05:19:54 PM
man, I am so glad my dad has never given me any girly nicknames like that.

same, that would do my head in.

My dad will occasionally call me "MY PET LAMB" but he says it in this weird German sarcastic way and I think he'd say it to a son too. He started calling me Boy George recently.

Wanted to smash my friend the other day when we were delivering fliers to the neighbours and I peered in one of the letterboxes and he said, you better stop being so nosy if you're going to be a guy.  And I know it was meant to be a joke, but I was pissed. Haven't you heard of SPIES before?!

My mom shouts sis eveywhere we go. Interestingly she only does it public. My aunt goes out of her way to treat me like female. She'll say things like "your a girl so you don't have a choice. When you grow up you might have to be a cleaning lady, you weren't born male so you can't mow yards."

I just wanna tell her "Listen b@#*% I can lift more then most full grown men. I can only pump out a measly 110lb bench but I can pick up at least 250. I'll be damn if I can't at least push 2lbs across the yard"

Quote from: elvistears on May 30, 2010, 05:43:53 PMHaven't you heard of SPIES before?!

LOL! Next time tell them you're just playing James Bond.

Quote from: kyle_lawrence on May 30, 2010, 02:00:19 PMI almost immediately regretted trying to move them on my own, and realized I was likely to hurt myself in the process, but I did it, and the look of surprise on my cousins face when he saw me coming down the stairs with it was totally worth it.

This.  I HATE it when people assume that I'm incapable of carrying heavy objects or doing anything that might cause me to break a sweat.  One time our school got a shipment of oranges and the band went out to help carry the boxes in.  I tried to go get a box but all the guys shoved past me and got them first.  "I'll get that!" Grrr!

And yesterday I went to the store for some dog food.  It was a large bag and it was heavy, but I carried it out under one arm instead of both to avoid some "helpful" employee trying to take it from me.  Yeah I'm scrawny, but if I want help I'll ask for it, thanks.

Yeah I was doing a job with my friend which involved lifting large rocks off a beach.  It was just me, him and one other dude, with a guy supervising us. So the guy who organised it kept getting the other two off by themselves to lift bigger things.  My friend was getting annoyed cos the other guy was actually really weak and he was doing all the work! So the next time he grabbed me and the other guy tried to be all like "oh let me!" and we were all uhhhh no.  Then my friend muttered to me, you're WAY stronger than him.  WAY.

I was stoked.

I remember when I was at a scrap yard I carried a transmission about half a football field when I was 13 and the men were like jezz ur a beast.
My mom outed me and then all of a sudden it was like "you shouldn't lift heavy things you might pull a muscle, leave the lifting to the men"

the guy working couldn't pick it up even two feet and I'm gonna pull a muscle, right.