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pleurisy - I hurt my lungs by binding too hard...

Started by zombiesarepeaceful, June 07, 2010, 05:14:26 PM

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zombiesarepeaceful

My tri top is wearing out. And if you knew me, you'd know I'm very anal about how flat my chest is. So I started layering things to bind and even using belts and ace bandages, plus my binder, plus other things. And a couple days ago I thought I was having problems with my asthma but nooooo....turns out I have Pleurisy....which means the membranes in/around my lungs or something are swollen and irritated. From binding too hard. So heads up...don't do this! It hurts. But I don't have exactly enough to get a new tri top yet. Can't really complain cause I brought it on myself, but wanted to warn other guys out there. Be careful how hard you bind.
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elvistears

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Kohitsu

Ouch! >< I hope things get better man, doesn't sound pleasant...
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Nathan.

Thanks for warning us about this, it doesn't sound fun.

Hope it gets better soon.
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Osiris

I'm sticking this to the top of the section. Many people forget the dangers of binding too hard and this is a good thing to warn against. Thank you for posting this zombie and I hope you get better soon dude. 8)
अगणित रूप अनुप अपारा | निर्गुण सांगुन स्वरप तुम्हारा || नहिं कछु भेद वेद अस भासत | भक्तन से नहिं अन्तर रखत
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Cindy

Sorry to butt in on a guy's thread.

I totally understand why you guys bind, but from a medical point of view make sure you can still breath deeply in and exhale without pain. Try having a good cough and make sure you don't get rib pain.

Another little problem to drop on us.

Hugs Guys, and I hope you get better soon Zombie

Cindy
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zombiesarepeaceful

Thanks guys, and thanks Osiris for moving and stickying it.

I have asthma as I said before and it's aggravated it a bit. I get winded alot easier. I'm exactly $5 short of getting a new binder. So I'm waiting.

Oddly enough, I've never had any injury from binding before this. And I've used worse things, including duct tape, and I've never had issues with this. I've had problems breathing before from it and I've bound so tight before that I had to leave work cause I felt like I was going to pass out. But be careful guys.
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Miniar

One wonders if one can use the "dangers of binding" as a reason to try and press for the insurance system to help me...



"Everyone who has ever built anywhere a new heaven first found the power thereto in his own hell" - Nietzsche
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zombiesarepeaceful

Yeah...but they'd probably argue that it isn't "medically necessary" and we're just inflicting self mutilation.
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Vin

I hope that you're feeling better now, Zombie. I find that I make my stomach worse by binding, but I need to bind, I don't feel comfortable without it. I need to save for a proper binder!  :-\


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GamerJames

I wish I could take advice like this and make my brain understand that what I'm doing to myself is dangerous, but I just can't. :(

My chest dysphoria is so bad that if I'm not bound "properly" (by my own insane definition) then I feel like complete crap, and that I'm walking around looking like a girl and being an utter fraud.

I wear a wife-beater underneath, then my tritop, then I reach under and flatten and position everything and use medical tape directly on my moobs to physically prevent anything from shifting or coming loose. Then I fold up the bottom of the tritop so that there are essentially 6 layers of compression fabric over the chest and safety pin that in place. Then an underarmour shirt on top of that. Then my tshirt, then a hoodie.

When I take it all off at the end of the day (usually 12+ hours later, up to 18hrs some days), my skin is raw from the chafing on my back/sides, where the tape was (from nips to shoulders) is irritated and sometimes a thin layer of skin peels off, and I put polysporin on all the raw/open areas. My ribs are always tender to the touch, and I probably haven't taken a deep breath all year (even when I'm unbound, such as for sleeping, I tend to breathe more shallowly now as I guess that's what my body is used to).

I know that I'm damaging my skin at the very least (there is already scarring developing in some areas), and potentially my ribs/lungs as well. But I honestly don't know how to bind any more safely while still being able to leave the house without feeling completely exposed, dysphoric, and panicky.

It's no good to just say "it's dangerous for you" because that hasn't helped me quit smoking either. I'm sure I probably sound obstinate, but it's not intentional. I just can't force myself to bind more gently when it's my dysphoria that's calling the shots.

Any thoughts anyone?
♫ Oh give me a home, where the trans people roam, and the queers and the androgynes play... ♫

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Cindy

Quote from: NES_junkie_James on June 24, 2010, 01:28:38 PM
I wish I could take advice like this and make my brain understand that what I'm doing to myself is dangerous, but I just can't. :(

My chest dysphoria is so bad that if I'm not bound "properly" (by my own insane definition) then I feel like complete crap, and that I'm walking around looking like a girl and being an utter fraud.

I wear a wife-beater underneath, then my tritop, then I reach under and flatten and position everything and use medical tape directly on my moobs to physically prevent anything from shifting or coming loose. Then I fold up the bottom of the tritop so that there are essentially 6 layers of compression fabric over the chest and safety pin that in place. Then an underarmour shirt on top of that. Then my tshirt, then a hoodie.

When I take it all off at the end of the day (usually 12+ hours later, up to 18hrs some days), my skin is raw from the chafing on my back/sides, where the tape was (from nips to shoulders) is irritated and sometimes a thin layer of skin peels off, and I put polysporin on all the raw/open areas. My ribs are always tender to the touch, and I probably haven't taken a deep breath all year (even when I'm unbound, such as for sleeping, I tend to breathe more shallowly now as I guess that's what my body is used to).

I know that I'm damaging my skin at the very least (there is already scarring developing in some areas), and potentially my ribs/lungs as well. But I honestly don't know how to bind any more safely while still being able to leave the house without feeling completely exposed, dysphoric, and panicky.

It's no good to just say "it's dangerous for you" because that hasn't helped me quit smoking either. I'm sure I probably sound obstinate, but it's not intentional. I just can't force myself to bind more gently when it's my dysphoria that's calling the shots.

Any thoughts anyone?


My warning was just that. I'm taking hormones pills whatever, all dangerous to my health.  I go out and could be beaten at anytime by homophobic animals who think I look like a guy in a dress. I drink too much because of GID.

We do what we can. I have nothing but admiration for my brothers, I was just trying to pass on some helpful advice.

Sorry
Cindy :-*
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GamerJames

Cindy, you've got nothing to be sorry about, I took no offense from what you said.

It's just that I know I'm doing damage to myself, and I know I'm kind of powerless against it. I really do want to hear if anyone has found any helpful ways to beat back the dysphoria at least enough to keep myself healthy.

Thanks for commiserating, I really appreciate your reply. :)
♫ Oh give me a home, where the trans people roam, and the queers and the androgynes play... ♫

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glendagladwitch

My spouse has pleurisy that comes back again and again.  It's because he had pneumonia bad enough to be hospitalized.  Are you sure your pleurisy was caused by binding?  Did you never have any lung disease, like bronchitis or anything?
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zombiesarepeaceful

Well, I have asthma. I have had walking pneumonia and bronchitis in the past, but they weren't chronic. It seems to have gotten better since I quit using the belts and ace bandages and stuff to bind.

Nes_Junkie..I"ve been there. I've tried wearing two tri tops over one another cause it made me as flat as I wanted...but then my extremities started tingling and I got light headed and figured it was probably wise to take off the extra tri top before I passed out. I had to pretty much force myself with reasoning with myself to take them off. Now I'm using a tri top with an exteme cotton concealer over top. It makes me flat enough...and I can still breathe and function. Yet there's days where I look and still think...IT DOESN"T LOOK MALE ENOUGH and I go nuts. Lately I've been folding the tri top I wear up as much as I can to create another partial layer, safety pinning that, then putting on the cotton concealer. Then a tshirt or whatever I'm wearing. In reality, it's probably fine to any person on the street. But as I've said before and will say until I get surgery (hopefully not afterwards..)...it's not flat enough to me when I'm feeling especially dysphoric. I have to force myself to shower some days, cause I can't stand the look of myself.
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GamerJames

I completely hear you. I tried two tritops once as well and I also learned quick quickly that I wouldn't make it through a whole day that way so I stopped. I know others say I look flat enough, or that I look like I've just got "pecs," but it's so hard to hear that reason and sanity when I look at myself and just see a huge lumpy "female-looking" chest. I know it's crazy, and I know I probably don't "have to" bind the way I do (to other people's standards of flatness), but I am not actually able to make myself stop. I've tried and I just can't do it. Gah... Here's hoping we both get top surgery before we further damage ourselves. :(
♫ Oh give me a home, where the trans people roam, and the queers and the androgynes play... ♫

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Al James

I struggle with this one because the only way i can get anywhere near as flat as i would like is to have so many layers on that when i look down at myself i look like ive got a huge chest anyway so im almost at the point of thinking why am i putting myself thro this much pain when i feel even more self conscious. Just cut the bl***y things off for me someone
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zombiesarepeaceful

Yeah, my drag dad who is ftm told me that not all guys have concave chests...but my chest isn't concave, it's just really flat if I bind how I want to. But binding tight enough to my standards would probably make me pass out. Idk. I think since starting T my pecs have gotten more muscular, but it means that even the small tri top that worked great before, doesn't now.
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GamerJames

Zombie: have you noticed any change in your "denseness" since being on T? I'm really hoping for that side effect, but I don't know how common it is...?
♫ Oh give me a home, where the trans people roam, and the queers and the androgynes play... ♫

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