Hi Everyone,

Got a dilemma, I have a fancy dress party coming up - my sisters 21st, she is going with the theme of Alice in Wonderland.

I'm still discovering myself, but I think I am MTF, at least thats how I feel, wondering what your thoughts are as to going as Alice (Don't worry, not stealing the spotlight sis is going as the mad hatter - shes more of a tomboy!)

Could be fun or a disaster...

Anyone have any advice?

BTW - further information, the party is a big family do (sis is BIG on family), no alcohol, and will be in our local church as she is highly involved.

Thanks,

-Tali

Well if you're not 'out' and don't really know about where you're going with it....it can sometimes be fun (and a good excuse) to dress up for costume parties.

I remember last Halloween, I had the chance to come to work dressed as a cheerleader (my costume) but I decided against it. Work was not 'out' to me yet and I planned on going full time (woman) sometime in the future so I didn't want people to think the costume was a joke.....because to me, it wasn't. And yet since I wasn't out, I would have had to make it out like it was a joke.

Hi Jerica, thanks for your view I hadn't thought of it like that, not sure where i'm going yet but I think I will try living ft at some point
I'll give it some careful thought, thankyou again
-Tali

The social rules for a costume party are pretty simple, stay in the theme (and general milieu - so no 'betty page as Alice' deal or 'Alice as a French Maid' look), but after that, anything goes.  If you call for an Alice in Wonderland costume party, then anyone can come as Alice.

It sounds like the perfect opportunity to be a girl in front of your family and gauge their opinions, and get used to it, and to decide whether or not this is you.

I would assume if you were to be able to reasonably pass in this costume it would make eventually coming out easier because your family will remember you then rather than thinking of stereotypes.

Thanks everyone for your support/candour though I agree it would be a good opportunity, knowing some members of my family, I don't think this would be a positive experience - not sure if i'm ready for that.
Perhaps the best way is to start where noone knows its me, at least then if it is negative i'll still be no-one.
I appreciate everyones input.
Love 
-Tali

Reminds me of a similar party I was invited to when I was in my teens. I wanted to go as a female character. No some characture, the real deal.

I didn't. I went as a tramp instead. I looked and felt silly.

A big mistake. A major lost opportunity. Something I still regret, over 35 years later.

You might have fun dressing for a change, but afterward it will only exacerbate your obsession with dressing and being female.  Also, I agree.......people will see you as a man in a dress, 'cause that's what's expected.
best.

Quote from: talitha on July 02, 2010, 09:41:27 PMPerhaps the best way is to start where noone knows its me, at least then if it is negative i'll still be no-one.

Sometimes that is best...and easiest! =)