I am almost 3 mths post and have had sex 7 times.  I told the first guy that i was post and he said that i was still a man and he is not going to do it, so at that point i opted not to tell anyone anymore.  My first experience was with a man who had no clue and it was WONDERFUL.  2nd - 4th were men who i was involved with pre.  they told me that My vagina was unlike no other they have eva had.  They told me that I was soon going to blow mens minds, well it happened last week.  i met a guy online 4mths ago when i was pre and i opted not to tell him.  we went to dinner and back to my place for drinks.  one thing lead to another and we ended up in an intimate situation.  he was in another world until he penetrated me.  he assumed during that he was in my rectum and when i told him he wasnt, he looked down at me and said, "oh no, this cant be right, you are too tight to be your age".  NOW, it wasnt mean, trust me he was THOROUGHLY enjoying it, but he kept begging me to tell him that he was in the backdoor.  I told him that i didnt do that and he got more aggressive during sex.  He got a little too rough so i pushed him off of me and he apologized.  He told me that if that WAS my vagina, he was afraid of me.  HE WAS SERIOUS.  when he left he immediately called me and said that he had NEVER met a woman like me and that i defintely would be hearing from him.  Well he really likes me and he calls me all day but now he is asking me things about my past.  Now he is TRULY suspicious and it is aggravating.  He suspects me but he also likes me ALOT.  I am playing it cool and just answering his questions.  LIKE, why dont u have any pics of you in your house, why did i have ky jelly,  did i play any sports in high school, and the questions are coming too close together and they are aggravating.  He is the nicest man i have met in years and he is totally infatuated with me but he WANTS me NOT to be a transsexual so bad that he wants proof in his subconcious.  Well needless to say, that i cant see him anymore because he is not going to stop and it is aggravating and insulting.  he is an older man who is married and havent had sex with a lot of women so a woman my age with a tight vagina, is just new to him and he said he cant believe that a woman as beautiful as me would be interested in HIM.  so i just thought i would pass this story on because the guys i have been with have all said that my vagina is the best they have eva had, but those men have been more sexually active than this guy and they arent as suspicious as he.  he is on cloud 9 with me BUT his suspicions are killing the situation.

any other stories like this and how are you all handling the suspicions?

Quote from: Valeriedances on July 15, 2010, 08:35:25 AM
I'll write more when I get home. I'm at work on my company's pc so it wouldn't be wise to share right now over their proxy server.

What a cliff hanger!

Quote from: Jasmine.m on July 15, 2010, 09:16:47 AM
What a cliff hanger!

LOL too funny

I myself am such a honest person and never was good at secrets, so id say by nature I'm a teller. However yeah Ive always been a teller because i didn't have a vagina. i mean its kinda hard to have sex and keep things a secret especially if i was turn on LOL. Now looking at the very real possibility of being with a guy and not having to tell i think I'm going to be more selective as to who and when i chose to say something.

If things were getting serious though i feel that a good relationship is built on trust and telling is necessary at some point.

Wow... this really stinks. You could be straight with him and see how he reacts? I would do this in a neutral setting. Better to tell him straight up about it than try to hide things and have it bite you in the ass later. Usually I don't tell men anymore, except when they do ask.

Quote from: Jessica.C on July 15, 2010, 02:25:38 PMNow looking at the very real possibility of being with a guy and not having to tell i think I'm going to be more selective as to who and when i chose to say something.

If things were getting serious though i feel that a good relationship is built on trust and telling is necessary at some point.

agree with all this

To be honest, he sounds like a weirdo.

He's married so you're no more than a bit of the side, from his point of view anyway.

But he seems to be seeking control over you.

Play this one carefully. Men like that don't like to be put down.

Sorry, I hope you don't think I'm being offensive. I'm really worried abiut you.

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Post Merge: July 15, 2010, 05:30:59 PM

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Another problem with married men is their wives sometimes can be quite agressive, defending their property.

Also, if his wife finds out and throws him out, you could be lumbered with him.

Quote from: spacial on July 15, 2010, 05:28:56 PM


Also, if his wife finds out and throws him out, you could be lumbered with him.

That along with dilating five times a day    Next thing you know you'll discover his socks in the microwave 

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Post Merge: July 15, 2010, 09:55:55 PM

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@missy  Only three months and you've had sex seven times!  You better slow down girl, otherwise your nice new vagina will be looking like a used up car wash "shammy" by April 

Lol Kristyn.

I just can't imagine not telling a guy I was serious with. I hate secrets after the years of hiding in the closet, but noone else needs to know. It's not worth it. It's almost gauranteed to ruin or at least change the relationship too. I think that's called a conundrum lol.

Quote from: Kristyn on July 15, 2010, 09:53:01 PM
Only three months and you've had sex seven times!  You better slow down girl, otherwise your nice new vagina will be looking like a used up car wash "shammy" by April 

LOL Kristyn, Although I have to say i am very sympathetic to Missy's cause. Ive always been a very impatient person and as a child recall always peeking at the x-mas gifts under the tree.

I mean if i am feeling good enough.. and things are looking good enough.. and i have the right willing participant. I fear i could end up with a shammy as well. LOL Maybe a chastity belt would be a wise investment.

Quote from: Jessica.C on July 16, 2010, 08:11:52 AM
LOL Maybe a chastity belt would be a wise investment.

Get two   

can't wait to read your post Valerie!

He was still calling me until last night.  I called HIM and he didnt answer, well there was a transsexual on the news that supposedly didnt tell her husband and he died and now the family is trying to say that the marriage wasnt legal because she was born a male and she isnt entitled to getting any money.  Well that hit the news where i live and I am sure he has seen that and he isnt going to call back.  The next day he said to me "I dont see why a beautiful woman like you would be interested in me", now that was my opening.  I told him, "stop asking me that.  I like you because you are a gentleman.  You call me just to say have a good day, You are very attentive, kind etc, so STOP questioning.

me    Do you like me

Him   Hell yes

me     then stop questioning everything

me      did you have a good time when we were together

him    hell yeah

Me      Well dammit quit analyzing stuff.  I like you and be happy that i d.  Nothing lasts forever and we will enjoy each other as long as we both serve a purpose and when we the cons start outweighing the pros, then we both move on CASE CLOSED.  Life is too short to be always questioning why.  So dont EVA let me hear you ask me that mess again.  DO YOU HEAR ME?

him  yes darling

and that was it.  I actually was speaking of his questioning ME. That was my way of dealing with it.  Now with this story on the news, that is going to set me back both confidence wise and socially.  Most people think sex changes are far fetched and IF a man suspects you, and finds out that you have a vagina then he dismisses the transsexual part BUT now, they see that a man can get married WITHOUT suspecting her then he is going to even question natal females.

to touch on the point of married men, that wasnt what i was trying to discuss but here it goes.  I have dated married men for 30 yrs and I am an expert on the husband AND the wife.  So trust me i am a pro at it. 

lets do the math.  females out number males supposedly 5 to 1 and in some cities 10 to 1 and take away the ones that are gay and the ones that are incerated.  now the ratio is 15 to 1. 

Common sense would tell anyone that IF a man lost desire for another woman because he got married, there would be toooo many women left out and if that were true there would still be only 2 people on earth.  there is a reason WHY a lot of societies practice polygamy.  I dont necessarily agree with it but it is what it is.  All men belong to someone ie marriage or dating.  When you marry a man, trust me, you have removed him from some other womans life.  It just means its your time and if you are lucky, you might be his last wife.  That is why IF I ever get through this sucessfully and marriage is put on the table then I wont accept until we both are in our mid 50's.  By that time you know who u are and he knows who he is and neither of you are probably going to change so the chances of til death do us part is more likely due to being the same person and that you dont have that much longer to live. 

Threads like this make me glad I am a dyke!

Quote from: missyzanta on July 21, 2010, 08:09:23 AM
females out number males supposedly 5 to 1 and in some cities 10 to 1 and take away the ones that are gay and the ones that are incerated.  now the ratio is 15 to 1.

Quote from: Ashley4214 on July 30, 2010, 06:16:21 PM

That would be Siberia lol  Human Sex Ratio

He is older and married.  That does not make you his GF, it just renders you this months hose beast.  Cis-girls learn this at an early age.  You should learn it now.

Quote from: Dee_pntx on July 30, 2010, 10:54:19 PM
I don't want to wind up dead in a ditch somewhere.  I live in red neck hell. 

...

But as a general rule of thumb, I do not disclose and will not disclose (post) unless I think it's very important to do so.

I'm sorry to have to say this, I sincerely wish it were no so, but trust me fessing up prior to intimacy remains important even post-op.

Having done total stealth in the past I believe it is a fools game in which, in reality often the person being most deceived is you yourself. In the bedroom is can also lead to real danger. I know of at least one longterm postop who was murdered over this.

I'm now the best part of 30 years post and I was also technically physically intersexed yet I would STILL always make sure that someone was ok with it before we got to that level.

Precisely because like you I don't want to end up in that ditch - and there are some men who feel that simply turning our bits inside out doesn't make us female.

(and unpleasant though it may be for the likes of us to acknowledge this, medically speaking, they are at least partly right too.)

It's honestly better to risk losing a few than get killed by a man who feels (even if wrongly in our view) that he has been deceived into having sex with what he regards as a man.

Besides if you chose your lovers well you will find that, like me, none of them will turn you down anyway.

In my view it is far more important to be SAFE than to have the luxury of a lover who does not know your past - and yes I agree that it WOULD be lovely to do so... but it's just not worth the risk of death or other serious injury - and trust me of those of you who choose not to tell, it is a SAD fact that some of you will end up as serious crime statistics.

This isn't meant to put anyone off - or upset you. It's absolutely your life, and if you feel you have to take that risk then that is your right.

I am just trying to point out the possibilities and thereby help keep you safe!