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I'm stuck :/

Started by James42, August 18, 2010, 01:04:56 PM

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James42

So I guess I could've posted this in the coming-out section, but I felt better posting it here.

Ok well, my situation is, I have 5 younger sisters (yea I know, "wow") and the only ones in my family I'm out to is my mom and recently the 2 eldest of the 5 (13&12 y.o) they all took it well enough and are understanding and supportive. My problem is that I want all of my sisters to know, seeing as how I live with them and see them everyday, they're a big part of my life, but my mom and I have no idea how to explain it to my 9,6, and 4 year old sisters.

So, any suggestions on how to go about it? They're all really smart for their age, but they're still kids. I'm just stuck and would feel a lot better having them all know, since it urks me when they say stuffthat refers to me as female which causes me to snap at them and its not their fault, its just hard.

Anyways, thanks for reading and any input
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Jillary Woolen Xσx

Just be very natural :)

Explain that some people are boys who grow up to be men, and girls who grow up to be woman
and some are girls who grow up to be men and boys who grow up to be women
When it comes to kids that age, its best you make the situation relatable so that they understand.
(be it by saying "Everyone has something that makes them special" "you can be whatever you want to be when you grow up"etc)
It doesn't have to be anything more than that, because too easily does sexuality become part of the explanation
and thats not necessary at all especially because of the age.
I have a HUGE family with a lot of my cousins ranged in that age and I've come to find that they are much more accepting and understanding than
most of my older cousins

Be sure to be very expressive of how much you love them too :)
and becuase if you didnt you wouldn't be sharing something so special with them
It may be confusing for them at first, but most things requiring explanation are confusing for kids :)
If that is the case, just give it time.

I Hope That helped a Little Bit!
XOX
xσX                                                                Xσx

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James42

Thanks Jocelyn, it definitely does help alot, especially since I'm not that good at explaining stuff with kid friendly terms. But again, thanks I appreciate it :)
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Lex

When it came to explaining that I'm FTM to my two younger brothers (at the time they were 4 and 8 yrs old), my dad and stepmom took care of it. Ever since my brothers can really remember, I've dressed like I do now (Like a guy) so that has never really been an issue, but when it came to starting T, my parents explained it as something along the lines of "Lex (which is what my brothers call me) is going to be taking some medicine that's going to make (unfortunately they all still use female pronouns with me) her feel better and happier. Lex is going to start sounding and looking more like a boy, but it's ok."

My brothers have never really asked anything, but the older of the two did say something like:
Brother "So, I heard you're taking some medicine now, like a shot?"
Me: "Yep, it's going to make me feel better"
Brother: "Does it hurt?"
Me: "No, not really"
Brother: "Oh, and your voice is going to get different?"
Me: "Yep, that's the plan"
Brother: "Oh, ok" He smiled and went on to play his DS.

So really, I haven't had a problem with it, and they haven't seemed to either. They treat me like an older brother, but still use female pronouns for the most part , but I figure that'll change in time. =]
I hope I helped at least a little.
Good luck!
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notyouraverageguy

Maybe if you could do it as a family.
Or ask a therapist how to go about it.

I think the explanation of you taking medicine to help make you feel better and explaining the main noticeable changes will probably work.

Or the way the world sees you isn't the same as the way you feel or see yourself.
Gender expression is NOT gender identity.

Defective Catastrophe.
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Nick Aiden

Kids are smart and will understand much easier than adults. They will take it exactly how it is.

For example if you ask your sisters if they are girls, they will say yes. If you ask them if they like being a girl, they'll say yes(unless of course they don't)... then you simply state that you didn't like it because you are really a boy. You'll take some medicine to fix it, and you'll be happier.

They will usually respond with barely any interest, because to a child it makes sense. They may have questions if they are the inquisitive type, but no social/society driven concerns will plague them. 10 minutes later it will be like nothing ever happened.

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James42

Thanks guys! I feel better about talking to them, I'm just waiting for my mom to give the go ahead. I know my sisters love me, so if the older 2 were understanding then I'm sure they'll be fine with it too. My 12 year old sister even mentioned to me that she was happy because she always wanted a brother :)

Thanks again for the input and reassurance
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