So, school started yesterday. I had my new, shorter hair cut even though it wasn't as short as I would like it because my mom refuses to let me cut my hair above my shoulders. I tried to hide my boobs as well as I could and I thought it had worked.

Well, I get to school with one of my friends who rides the same bus as me and we find our names on the list in school to find our homerooms, and then we start walking when we run into this girl that I guess I consider my friends - she says we're friends - but she kind of tends to offend me with things I like and such.

Anyway, we ran into her and she gave me a hug and said, "Did your boobs get bigger?"

And I said, "Um...I hope not?" (Nobody knows I'm FtM, so you know, I guess I shouldn't have expected for my boobs to go completely unnoticed since I'm still obviously a girl.)

That made the conversation awkward I think because she stopped talking. Then she complimented the color I dyed my hair.

That, though, was practically a blow to my ego. I was all, " I THOUGHT IT WAS WORKING." It made my day suck but I stopped thinking about it after an hour or so and let it go. Oh well.

Other than that, it wasn't too bad except I caught myself trying to scratch my dick even though it wasn't there. I don't know why I was trying to scratch it, but I was. Then I noticed what I was doing and realized how strange it must have looked, so I looked around to see if anybody saw.

Sorry, I just needed to sort-of-rant somewhere. I told this stuff to a friend of mine and she didn't understand why I was so offended.


Today I look a little more feminine since I'm wearing a racer back but I love the jacket I'm wearing so whatever. It has a ribbon on it though, which I actually like and the jacket hides my breasts okay.

Even before I realized I was trans, I always hated it when someone would comment on the moobs.  My mom would make us go to church all the time and for awhile on Sunday nights they're were doing a class to teach the girls to be proper "ladies".  Well, one night the teacher called my name and said, "Hey, you need to listen to these fashion tips--they're for people with big boobs and you've got 'em."  Uuuuuuuuughhhhhh.  I crossed my arms over my chest and said very vehemently "I do not!"  The girls snickered and one said, "Yeah, you do."  But when I look back at pictures, I really didn't, it was just that I was overweight.  Argh, I hated that class.

But yeah, that really sucks.  I've been using too-small sports compression shirts for binding (you can get 'em at Wallyworld for ten bucks; I found mine at Salvation Army and Goodwill), maybe you can get one of those.  I cut the neck and sleeves out, and wear two or three with the bottom one doubled up.  That way you wouldn't have to mention to your mom about getting a binder.