It's amazing how much things can change in 24 hours.  Yesterday it was certain I was getting laid off and there was no time frame given as to how long I'd be off.

Today I am approached and asked if I was willing to sit at home until some work comes up or take a layoff.  I asked how long I'd be sitting.  "Two weeks."  Of course I took the sit. 

So now my world's been turned around again.  I was looking at the layoff as an opportunity to really live full time, to get my hair styled in a feminine cut, to have my eyebrows shaped, to take steps that, if in male clothing, would be obvious I'm transitioning.  In other words cross the line I haven't been able to due to work.  And also to be aggressive about electrolysis, possibly go every day, if my face and pain tolerance allow it.  I was ready to take the dive. 

And this took a lot of mental preparation because I would be taking away the guy crutch, the crutch I can fall back on if things get too rough or if I'm just plain chicken.  I was committed to living totally full time because I knew that was very important.

Now my head is spinning.  I have no idea what I'll do.  Life in the see-saw world. 

Does anyone have the numbers to this evening's lottery?  Winning that would sure solve a lot of problems.

Julie

Hey Julie,

Any chance you could come round to mine and wire in a new RCD box ?


I am sure you will make it one way or another, just a little more patients.

No problem Lolli!  What time should I be there?

Julie

You have to do what you have to do ...
Then you do what you need to do ...
Then you do what you want to do ...
Some place in there you decide which is which, hopefully first, before just reacting.  From what I have seen, I don't think you have a problem doing that.  The rest of it is living with the results.  Use the time to regroup, plan your work (Julie's work), and how best to continue forward using the delay.

I hope this makes some sense, and if it does, explain it back to me.

Susan Kay

Julie, my dear, I was just reading your post yesterday and was going to repond, but I didn't. In a good sense and a bad sense it was a perfect opportunity! To be laid off and be able to go full time is a dream that any transgendered individual would want. I know that if it happend to me, I'd have to make absolute sure that I've got a nice cash flow still coming in from some place (like a retirement fund or soemthing to tide me over) to pay for things. The life of a woman is not cheap. I'm really sorry to hear that your going full time only lasted a day,  but at least you'll be able to go and have FUN for two weeks!!! Now that I would take full advantage of!!!

Love always,
Gina

What's going to drive me to insanity is I really don't know when I'll be going back to work.  It could be "AS SOON AS" 2 weeks but it could be longer, maybe as much as two months.  I can't make any full time, long term plans.  Add to that my boss threw some extra hours in my last paycheck so he can call me in for meetings or pricing changes on the job.  I probably know more about the job than anyone in the company but they're following union standards (first on the job is last to leave & vise-versa).  My boss (the one in the office) doesn't like it but it's company policy.  So he's trying to figure out ways to make me available when he needs me without breaking policy.

What all this means is I'm firmly planted nowhere.  I love my job but I can't wait for this insanity to end.

He called me last night and already had some work for me to do.  Once I post this, that's what I'll be working on.  At least I'll be working at home.

Julie

Oh Julie, my dear sweetheart, you are really up the creek without a paddle, to put it lightly. Patients is the key word here, and you must do what you can while waiting to be called back.  If I were you, I would get up every morning and put on something really pretty and just frolic around your house. If your boss calls and needs you to work, it's just a matter of changing clothes. Just make the best of it. 

                                      Love always,
                                             Gina