Alright so I posted a question regarding MTF transitions with HRT on yahoo and was informed about this lovely community. I am and always have been extremely desirable of the Female gender as my own. I just today actually began to come out to myself more clearly as how I really feel inside. I suppose in the past I didn't want to admit it to myself in fear of being though of as different and harassed as being so. Now as I get older I am starting to care less and less what people think and more about the quality of my life in regards to my happiness. I have yet to really explore any feminine outlets, ie cross dressing for certain reasons as not having the clothes to do so and being scared I might be found out. I am really new to this but cannot any longer deny my feelings and am opening up to people whom I hope can share in my feelings and desires to change. I am by nature a very shy and timid person and I believe this to be a hindrance in my exploration of desire and curiosity. Has anyone else experienced this? Am I truly a trans gender? This all so overwhelmingly new and exciting for me I do not even think I know who I am anymore.. Help !   

Hi Divine,

Welcome to our little family. Over 38es 00 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

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Hugs and Love,
Janet

Welcome Divine! Yes, the moment of self-discovery can be overwhelming and lead to more questions than answers. If this is really something you want to pursue, you might want to see if you can find a therapist. Preferably one that specializes in gender issues, but any therapist is probably better than no therapist. And you, of course, have a great resource here in Susan's.

hi welcome to Susan's

Hi Divine,

Welcome to Susan's. Yes the feelings of TG, where to be in life, how to live our lives can be very confusing. Acceptance of ourself is something that is very important for many. It often seems more important for people with gender identity disorder (GID) than people who do not have that. I remember talking to a GG friend of mine asking if her sons had ever questioned their sex or gender. She was surprised and said no, they just grew up as boys, did boy things and now are doing men things. It was my time for being surprised; 'You mean they never thought they were woman?" I thought everyone did , and we had some sort of puberty choice. Sadly found out that was not true.

Explore around the site, post and ask questions. Don't be afraid. As Janet said you are family now. Welcome. We are always here. From the point of deepest depression to the greatest joy. Someone will answer. We are completely International so someone is on line at all times.

Hugs Divine

Cindy

 Divine,

   It's funny I was just talking with a friend of mine who used to live near Divine (the late actor).They hung out allot, Divine was a very nice person. Is that were you pick up the name?

     Yes, timid and she was the order of the day for me. In fact up till very recently,  I learned that expressing my true self is what was making me feel that way.

   Welcome to Susan's

Thank you everyone for the welcomes, I appreciate it.

Dear Melody, I thought of talking to a therapist but am a bit afraid that they might try and turn me away from expressing myself and possibly making me feel that it is not normal and therefore I am not. Also I am a student and do not think I can afford one, however, I am under the understanding that in order to be eligible for HRT one must have the consent of a gender therapist?

Dear Cindy, I wish I could have had a choice, that is why I am so avidly exploring my choices now that I am older and understand myself better. I thank you for the very welcome reply to my introduction It is very very nice to know that I can find positive support and/or reinforcement, also valuable knowledge.

Dear Erocse, I am unfortunately not familiar with the late actor Divine. I used to know a girl whom I found to be very beautiful and inspired me to explore my feelings about what eventually led me here, named Divine. It was the first name that came to mind so I guess that's how I chose it.

Again thanks everyone for the warm welcome, you can definitely expect to see more of me, and I look forward to getting to know, and sharing with everyone.

Love
Divine

welcome Divine