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Is there a right way to do this ?

Started by Angela, October 30, 2010, 10:43:13 AM

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Angela

Ok, some people may find this odd. My boyfriend always compliments me about my looks. I asked him if he could change 1 thing about me, what would it be? He said he always had a thing for overweight women. I asked him if it would make him happy if I was, he said very much.  You may find this silly, but I love him so much that I plan on doing this. He wants me to gain around 80lbs. Should I go to the doctor, for a certain diet to be safe, Or just eat more? I probably would never do this for any other person, but Michael travelled to Athens with me when I had my accident. I would give my life for him. :)
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cynthialee

I would highly sugest you reconsider this choice.
Being overweight is not good for your health. You got this far in transition to what? Ruin your body and lower your life expectancy?
just my 2centavos
So it is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you can win a hundred battles without a single loss.
If you only know yourself, but not your opponent, you may win or may lose.
If you know neither yourself nor your enemy, you will always endanger yourself.
Sun Tsu 'The art of War'
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Angela

Cynthia, thanks for your concern. Im just asking if there is a safe way to do this without harming my health.
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niamh

Quote from: Angela Foureira on October 30, 2010, 10:58:01 AM
Cynthia, thanks for your concern. Im just asking if there is a safe way to do this without harming my health.

No.

Over 5 and a half stone? I don't want to seem rude but that's crazy. I highly suggest you see a doctor so that he can tell you exactly how harmful to your health that would be.

Any amount overweight can not only make your life harder in the short run (finding clothing, reduce in fitness, self-esteem issues) but it can lead to serious health complications in the long run: diabetes, stroke, cancer, brain Hemorrhage...

The only healthy time to gain weight is when you are underweight.

I agree with Cynthia here. Big bad idea.
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Janet_Girl

Depending on what your current weight is, 80 lbs may or may not be unhealthy.  But any weight you put on will have to loss at some time.

I gain weight and now I which I could lose it. 

There is no real safe way to gain weight.
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Rosemary

Good heavens Angela! If my boyfriend would say such a thing i would be very angry.
There is no way to increase weight above your normal bmi without damaging your health. You should tell him to never wish for something unhealthy to happen to the person he loves.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/tools/bmi_calculator/bmimetric_index.shtml
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Angela

Everyone thanks for your comments. I was hoping you would respond in that manner. I showed Michael the responses here, he feels bad now, but understands. 
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Nero

Quote from: Angela Foureira on October 30, 2010, 11:21:36 AM
Everyone thanks for your comments. I was hoping you would respond in that manner. I showed Michael the responses here, he feels bad now, but understands. 

Good. There's nothing wrong with preferring women with a little meat on their bones, but you should never change your body for someone else.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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pebbles

I mean the man has a fetish it's pretty innocent :) he's obviously not force feeding you anything and at the end of the day it's your body, and you gotta live in a way that's conducive to good self-esteem.

But I'd doubt you could gain that amount of weight in a very safe manner the problem is once you've gained it it might be difficult to loose it which is something I struggle with myself, your stomach may well stretch and you may feel more hungry and it is begin overweight in the long term that causes health problems.

Not to mention that a large amount of weight gain like 80ibs might cause skin problems such as cellulite, stretch marks, and loose skin.
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Angela

Pebbles, yes its just a fetish. But it does make me wonder how I would look if I did go with it. Im currently 112 lbs, lol  I would be close to 200 lbs :P Ok, enough from me, because he is embarassed  by  showing him the responses.
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Shynoir

Even so please don't willingly increase your weight unless you are underweight. Other than health issues It can make you less feminine, fat promotes testosterone. Maybe not too much, but still it does. I read that somewhere and I really need to start categorizing my bookmarks. Its easy to put on fat but its close to impossible to loose it. My mother was really beautiful before she gave birth to me and my twin, since then she stopped caring at all. She has a tick voice now, leg problems, stroke attacks. The list goes on and on. Shes been on a diet for three years and unable to burn anything.

In my own case I stopped caring at one point and indulged on comfort foods. I had to work from a 5'3" 165 pounds, 143, pounds and finally close to 95 pounds. Its very hard to burn all that without building muscles or sagging the skin... but I did do it somehow. Such a miracle will be close to impossible if on HRT though. Well Angela, you are a smart girl, I'm sure you'll do what's best for you.  :D
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rejennyrated

Angela,

I am glad you had a happy outcome. As someone who is predisposed to be a larger woman, I have to say that whilst there is nothing wrong with that, to try and deliberately put yourself there is not a good idea.

To my doctors surprise and relief I seem to suffer from none of the ill effects generally worried about in connection to weight, but I think that may be because my system is just naturally set up that way.

I think the upshot is that trying to force others into an un-natural size based on someone else's ideas is not really a good idea and certainly 80lbs sounds far too much. I am probably about 50lbs over the ideal and I certainly would not want to be any more than that
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rejennyrated

Quote from: fluffles on October 30, 2010, 11:47:28 AM
fat promotes testosterone.
Actually no it doesn't - as Pebbles will doubtless confirm for us - fat helps to aromatise testosterone and will thus cause blood levels to drop and increase estrogen.

Estrogen in turn increases the bodies tendency to lay down fat - which is why those of us ladies who are "ample" find it so much more difficult to lose it than men do!.
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Angela

Like I said earlier in the thread, Im not going to do it. I purposely put this thread up to show him its wrong. That way he wont say its just me.
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spacial

One of the advantages of having an international upbringing is that I can appareciate different societies so much more.

What we have here is a clash of different attitudes. On the one side, the Mediterian attitude that health is about being well fed, nicely coloured and stable disposition.

On the other, the US attitude that sees health as being thin fit and serious.

Angela. I would strongly suggest you give Michael some reassurance that he should not be embarrassed about his wanting you to be a bit more buxom. You need to explain to him that a large part of your background has conditioned you to be thinner and fitter.

I'm sorry to have to say this to the westerners, but most of these notions about weight are contemporary and unproven. There is ample evidence to demonstrate that weight is largely genetic in any case. This has been demonstrated by the simple observation that different people can eat the same diet, some will be thin while others get quite heavy.

Anyway Angela. you do what makes you feel comfortable. In my experience, the way to make a man happy is how you do it.
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Angela

Aw Spacial, you have no idea how often you have helped me here. 1 thing that I always found strange, I lived in the US till 9 years old. People had their lunch around 1 PM or so. Then dinner around 6 PM. In Greece they eat lunch around 3 PM, then dinner around 10 PM. I know, crazy. :P
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rejennyrated

Yeah Angela - don't misunderstand me I know you weren't going to do it. I was just giving you a ringing endorsement for making the right decision. As I said in my opening line "I am glad you had a happy outcome".

When I was young the pounds went on easy enough - sadly now I am older they don't come off so easy! :D
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Angela

Quote from: rejennyrated on October 30, 2010, 12:54:47 PM
Yeah Angela - don't misunderstand me I know you weren't going to do it. I was just giving you a ringing endorsement for making the right decision. As I said in my opening line "I am glad you had a happy outcome".

When I was young the pounds went on easy enough - sadly now I am older they don't come off so easy! :D
No hard feelings, thanks Rejennyrated. :)
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Shynoir

Quote from: Angela Foureira on October 30, 2010, 12:37:56 PM
1 thing that I always found strange, I lived in the US till 9 years old. People had their lunch around 1 PM or so. Then dinner around 6 PM. In Greece they eat lunch around 3 PM, then dinner around 10 PM. I know, crazy. :P

Its not so crazy. Almost all Asian countries take lunch around 2PM-3PM and dinner around 8PM-9PM.  :laugh:

by the way... I like the new picture Angela, but its strange. I never realized that you had such a tall neck.
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Angela

Quote from: fluffles on October 31, 2010, 01:12:05 AM
Its not so crazy. Almost all Asian countries take lunch around 2PM-3PM and dinner around 8PM-9PM.  :laugh:

by the way... I like the new picture Angela, but its strange. I never realized that you had such a tall neck.
No, not really. Its just the way the photo came out that makes it look really tall. ;D
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