So, I know I've noticed some people mention they're out at college and I was wondering how the bathroom/locker room is handled by the students and school staff. I would like to take Karate and some other phys ed classes but refuse to do so if I have to use the womens' room as I'm not a woman.

Well bathrooms are really a non issue because they're eveyrwhere. I don't think they can necessarily stop you. I mean there are legal things I've heard about, but if you're seen as male and no one sees any different, you're better off in the men's room. I use it all the time at school.

As for locker rooms... You'd have to go directly to someone in charge. Maybe more specifically in the department in which Karate is a part of. So probably head of P.E. Let them know your situation and see how they feel. If your school has gender identity under they're non discrimination policy, it helps, but you should be able to have some sort of accomodation.

It really just takes asking.

If you take a class that doesn't have an unusual uniform, you can just show up in your gym clothes and not have to deal with locker rooms at all.  I haven't been in a locker room since elementary school. . .

Bathrooms:  If you're seen as male and comfortable going into a male restroom, go to the male restroom.  If not, there might be unisex restrooms you can use.

Locker rooms:  I can't help you there--I've always gone into the female locker room, but I wasn't trying to pass as male at the time.  I always changed in a stall, though. 

Thanks WolfMan I haven't started there yet. Registration isn't until December, but I've been doing online college and missing having sport type activities so hopefully they can work with me. I'll be going in telling them I'm trans and I'll talk to the PE department head as you suggested before I fill out paperwork because if they can't I'll find another college.

Ilan: I'm not sure I'm alright with wearing gym clothes around all day but it is a good idea.

Gabriel: I'm hoping I pass well enough pre-T to pass to everyone and use the mens room but if not I'm really hoping they do have a unisex bathroom

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Quote from: Ilan Reshon on November 11, 2010, 07:38:55 PM
If you take a class that doesn't have an unusual uniform, you can just show up in your gym clothes and not have to deal with locker rooms at all.  I haven't been in a locker room since elementary school. . .

If you're planning on doing karate, gym clothes would seem to be a bit inappropriate. A gi is pretty much a necessity and they are unisex.

If you like to appear as a sporty type, a track suit is also pretty unisex.

I would think, your biggest problem will be your binder. But you have quite a bit of experience with those, you're pretty smart so you'll figure out the most appropriate type to use.

Best of luck. I loved karate. It was perhaps the most relaxing sport I've ever encountered.

I contacted the school and told them my situation.  My college has a family bathroom located right outside the locker rooms.  The school said I should change there, and store my stuff in the womens locker room.  I got them to give me a letter to use as well, just in case there were any problems. 

I could have just as easily changed in a stall in the locker room too.

Valerie, that's awesome that your school worked with you like that If they don't already have a policy and won't let me use the men's locker room I'll see if I can do something like that

Spacial- yeah, here in the Florida heat track pants with a T-shirt or basketball shorts and a T-shirt would probably be less hot than my usual clothes anyways. My binder is about a year old so it's pretty loose but luckily even when it was new it didn't constrict my breathing enough to keep me from doing sports.

Typically for martial arts you wear something under your gi anyway. Just wear a binder, T-shirt and white shorts or boxers under your regular clothes, and you won't have to worry about getting naked at all - you could change in the men's locker room, in a family restroom, hell, I've changed for jiujitsu in the middle of the gym. If you don't ask anyone, they can't tell you no.

Thanks for the advice Kyril I tend to wear a white Tshirt under everything anyways. That's pretty brave to change in the middle of the gym man but that's very true that they can't tell me no if I don't ask.

I never use to wear anything under my gi.

But I suppose I'm just a tart at heart.

I live on my college campus, so I just change beforehand in my dorm. And as for martial arts, I'm taking Tae Kwon Do for a fun class, but as they assume people are only taking it for a semester, no gi is required. I just wear a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt.

I wear under armour heat gear tank tops under my gi, and I'm not the only guy who does that.

At my college, and elsewhere, I've been using the women's room ever since I went full time.  Last semester I was using one on the opposite side of the building in which I had classes in, as I was still uncomfortable with bumping into the other girls in my program. This semester, however, I started using the washroom near my classes, and things haven't really been awkward. I've ran into at least 4 or 5 other girls in my program since and none of them really seemed to care that I was using the same washroom as them, despite the fact that they had known me as boy for more than a year and a half before I came out as a girl.

Locker rooms are probably a touchier subject since there is nothing to separate people and give them privacy. I haven't actually used a women's locker room yet, but I know that transpeople have the legal right to use the locker room that corresponds to their gender identity (in Canada at least. I'm not sure about elsewhere). I would suggest changing in a stall in the men's locker room, as that's what I would probably do (just in the women's locker room, in my case. lol.). That way you can still change in the proper locker room and avoid mistreatment or accusations from others.

Thanks Gilligan, Sean, and Rachel

I've decided to hold off for now for a lot of reasons but am grateful to know this and hear everyone's answers so I know in the future. I've been full time for a few years now and always use the men's room I guess I was just more worried about the staff who knew my bio gender from my paperwork seeing me in there and causing a scene because for everyone else I pass well enough that I don't see myself having issues.

I just show up to karate in my gi. Simple as. (there's also a 'family changing room", so I can shower )

This locker room/bathroom issue will eventually resolve itself society-wide ... in time.  People are capable of evolving in their outlook about it, and evolve they must.  Here's a real-life experience for you to cogently make this point:

For 5 years running, yours truly has used ... a coed locker room ... and coed showers.  There were gals and guys of all ages, shapes, sizes in all states of dress and undress ... most of 'em (myself definitely included) as naked as the day they were born. 

No scenes.  No rapes.  No crimes.  Why not?  Because people made a decision.  Yes, that's right:  They made a decision.  They just decided that doing this was cool, that there was nothing wrong with it and they would simply not worry about it and just did it.  It's just that simple.  It really is.

No lie .. no joke ... no bull.  These were some of the very best experiences of my entire life, I swear to God.  It was beautiful.  All of society's bull->-bleeped-<- ... fomented over centuries ... simply evaporated away in the blink of an eye.  Why?  Because, people decided it WAS bull->-bleeped-<- ... and just did it.  It's that easy, folks, and was it ever awesome.  It CAN be done.  I know.  I was there.

Now, in the real world, it will take a long time, indeed, for coed locker rooms and especially coed showers to become an everyday norm.  In fact, it may never actually get to that point.  Why not?  Too many people in the world really ARE a-holes and d-bags.  They ruin it for everyone. 

There IS hope.  Unisex and "family" restrooms are becoming evermore prevalent ... as well they should IMHO. 

Where did I do these things?

www.CalienteResorts.com

to which I have been many a time and miss, oh, so much!   Peace out.       Lacey

Sorry insanitylives, guess I lost track of the thread. That's awesome that there is a family changing room The school I was gonna go to didn't have one of those.

Laceylynn: That place sounds pretty cool and look pretty nice. I wish I could say that I think women would not care about sharing a locker room in every day live but when I was still working I had to use the womens locker room and you would not believe the hateful stares and such that I got. The one time that I was so fed up I went into the men's, they all got mad too. Looks like I'll be moving after I've gotten the chance to start hormones and my mom is behind me 100% on getting treated as male, even if she still isn't entirely okay with it.

So when the time come I will feel confident in moving and just telling them "I'm male, this is how it is, I'm paying a lot to go here and if I can't be treated right I will switch schools." Does that sound to harsh?

Quote from: Michael Alexander on November 30, 2010, 07:19:15 AM
Sorry insanitylives, guess I lost track of the thread. That's awesome that there is a family changing room The school I was gonna go to didn't have one of those.

Laceylynn: That place sounds pretty cool and look pretty nice. I wish I could say that I think women would not care about sharing a locker room in every day live but when I was still working I had to use the womens locker room and you would not believe the hateful stares and such that I got. The one time that I was so fed up I went into the men's, they all got mad too. Looks like I'll be moving after I've gotten the chance to start hormones and my mom is behind me 100% on getting treated as male, even if she still isn't entirely okay with it.

So when the time come I will feel confident in moving and just telling them "I'm male, this is how it is, I'm paying a lot to go here and if I can't be treated right I will switch schools." Does that sound to harsh?

No way does that sound too harsh!  Mike, that sounds like a plan, man, and a damned good one, I must say.  Do it if that's what will work for you.  As you know, I'm totally on your side ready to cheer you on and do so sincerely anytime ... anytime at all. 

You've got it together, man.  You deserve a good life.  Do what you've gotta do to get it, within bounds of reason, of course.   

Yes, in the real world, integrated locker rooms and restrooms are generations away ... if they ever happen at all, and I doubt they WILL ever happen.  Too many folks are too f---d up in too many ways for this to ever come to be, in our lifetimes anyway. 

There IS hope, dude.  When I was the age you are now, being of the LGBTQ Community in any way, shape or form was a guarantee of a very hard way to go ... sometimes insanely hard.  Why?  The STUPIDITY and MEANNESS of many people.  Stupid assess!  Honestly!

Sorry to flip out on you, man.  Drives me crazy.  Always did.  Still does.  I mean, there was this boxer when I was a kid, Cassius Clay.  You may know him today as ... Muhammad Ali.  I loved him!  He was smart, witty, handsome, well-mannered and decent, but mainstream society treated him like dog crap.  Why?  Because he was a black man who dared to be himself in a nutso, bigoted society. 

Fortunately, that has changed for the better these days ... WAY better, believe me.  Still have quite a way to go though.  So, what am I saying?  People ARE evolving!  Just takes time.  However, they ARE evolving.  There is hope!

Peace out, man!       Seek your joy ... we'll be cheerin' ya on.       Lacey