My wife told her friend that I was tansgendered. I felt that it would be okay to ask her how she felt about me being transgendered. She seemed to be okay talking to me as I said in my other topic. I was wrong. She was still looking at me as a man even though she knew the truth about me. She even told me that she wanted to talk more about it later. She told my wife about are conversation and how I made her uncofertable. I really did not think that she would care. I had know idea that I was going upset this woman as much as I did. My wife came home mad at me for talking to her. . Just wanted to say I guess it is best to keep it to myself for now. The problem was she felt that I should not have been talking to her being a nother woman's husband. I just miss took her for a friend thinking that it was okay to talk to her about myself.

Quote from: laineyjain on November 11, 2010, 11:14:00 PM
The problem was she felt that I should not have been talking to her being a nother woman's husband. I just miss took her for a friend thinking that it was okay to talk to her about myself.

I've come across this sort of problem myself. I think it kinda sums these type of people up really.

If you think about it, what probably happened is she was intersted in the conversation and enjoyed getting to know you. Then, after, felt guilty about being closer to a man.

Hopefully your wife will figure it out eventually.

Well, the friend  did say she  wanted to talk.  So, she should stop complaining and accept that she caused you to misunderstand her. She now knows what the score is and should be  adult enough to live with the consequences.  If anyone has a right to be offended it is you, not her.

Your wife seems to be taking her part instead of defending you which sounds unfair.  Her friend is an adult and will survive being uncomfortable, it's not like she is going to come out in a rash or something. 

You said it was "your wife's friend" in that case this woman's loyality is to your wife and will take whatever view point she feels will make your wife happy.  If your wife accepts your transition and is happy about it, she needs to make sure her friend understands that.

my wife flipflops from carring to thanking that I am a little crazy. Yes, her friends loyality is to her. I am just happy to have as many friends that care for me at susan's.  . My daughter told me she would help me when she grows up to be a girl that put a smile on my face. I finally stopped chewing my finger nails off also. I am looking forward to March it will be one years that I have gotten to know myself. I have learned alot about what I like and dont like. I saw a hair style on a girl that I know that I am going get for myself later 

It most have been exciting to fine someone you could share with.
I am truly sorry that it went so bad.
Friends that except us being TG are so hard to fine.
Yes, Laney, I too am so thankful for Susan's.
That we have friends here who seem understand and seem to care.
Jillieann

It's really good that your wife's friends are so loyal.

But remember that this one was interested. She just modified her behaviour to show solidarity with her friend, your wife.

That is understandable, but also positive from your point of view.

People have unexpected points of view on these matters.

At my place of employ, I have been informed that any disclosure of information regarding my situation is considered sexual harassment and will be punished harshly. (Further, that I won't be believed if I assert that I didn't even talk to a given person in the event of a complaint.)

Doesn't it suck to be surprised by the special standards applied to us retroactively?

One day, it will be common for people to know what "transgender" means.

For now, when people hear "transgender", they often think, "sex change", which, to them, means "a doctor removes your genitals and replaces them with the opposite set of genitals".  Even if you try to explain it, the image of genital surgery will still be in the backs of many people's minds.  This is why they get uncomfortable or offended. 

So many times, I feel like I've been given a chance to return to College here . I'm given so many opportunities to see so many highly educated and enlighting answers on so many subjects . That being said , this topic was certainly interesting to me . I hope this myopic woman soon comes to her senses as she definetly neds a hobby ! ellen