It took me a long time to come to terms with my family.
My situation was a little different from Ercose, but the effect, ultimately, the same.
Eventually, we simply need to accept that their belief that they have any authority over our life, is their dilusion.
In another thread, ercose, described something of her relationship with a sister. Gradually, she will realise that that relationship was never based upon respect. It was was a grant of brief regard, in return for appropriate behaviour. (Be good and you get a candy, be naughty and you get nothing).
In my own case, my entire family, essentialy treated me like this. I just didn't know it. I tried so hard to fit in with their expectations. Putting aside all of my own aspirations. Trying so hard to live up to the expectations they seemed to have.
Many of the younger members here are clearly going through similar situations. For many of them, breaking away is more difficult than for the likes of ercose and I, because they haven't managed, yet, to build any sort of independant life. All the more insulting for them that they aer frequntly dismissed as, immature, going through a phase, being naughty.
Many of the older members here found that, when they finally achieved the personal insight themselves, the lives they had so carefully and painstakenly build up, come crumbling down, as spouces simply were unable to deal with it.
Such is the effort many of us make in trying to live up to the standards of others.
ercose and I have something in common here, in that we have managed to survive. I so much want to put my arms around so many here, especially the older members, who have given up so much, to regain that which is so important to every human, ourselves.
All that can be said is, for the benefit of achieveing that most priceless of goals, yourself, it's worth it.
