There are no rules anywhere hon if you don't let people define you, you gotta do it for yourself first, not for other peoples perceptions.

I am somewhere in the middle between genderqueer and transsexual FTM / FTGQ and must admit I lied a bit to my shrink and presented as transsexual in my mind. However, I never pretended I wanted to go the whole way through with bottom surgery. I live in a place with only one shrink for trans, who is a nice guy but very old school. And I was afraid I might be refused hormone treatment because then I would have been stuck. I can lie while looking straight into people's face, which made it easier.

Now how do you live as a MTGQ?

Quote from: Shang on June 24, 2010, 08:28:27 PM
I just want to be able to flip between male and female whenever I want to.   

This is what I would like as well.  I am masculine and feminine and sometimes neither.  Though I would like to get the chest appendages removed.  There are times when I want to be feminine but I do have a lot of dysphoria about having a female body.  Confusing?  Definitely.

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Post Merge: August 04, 2010, 11:42:28 PM

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Quote from: accord03 on June 27, 2010, 07:48:04 AM
I'm confused. Why would you want to be stuck in-between?
Which gender do you prefer for romance? Both?

I am what I am.  It would actually be easier if I was on one end of the spectrum or the other, it would've made the decision to transition so much easier.

Quote from: Fencesitter on July 31, 2010, 12:21:26 AM

Now how do you live as a MTGQ?

I act how I feel comfortable & do what feels right often breaking the gender rules
I present in a positive Androgynous way that is sometimes called "gender ->-bleeped-<-"
I have a thick beard but always wear female clothes normaly pants that could go either way and a very fem top sometimes I wear makeup mostly just eyeshaddow sometimes lipstick.  It is rare for me to not be wearing padding on my chest. I am transitioning to the middle on hormones and wanting both parts down there.  I don't know if that is entirely possible but I do know of a compromise that is possible boy bits to procreate and girlish bits for toileting

@Kinkly

That sounds interesting, I've never heard of someone MTQG presenting with a beard and female wardrobe all the time.

How do people react to this? Do you get a lot of trouble or are they cool about it?

Quote from: Fencesitter on August 07, 2010, 04:44:13 AM
@Kinkly

That sounds interesting, I've never heard of someone MTQG presenting with a beard and female wardrobe all the time.

How do people react to this? Do you get a lot of trouble or are they cool about it?

I get a lot of strange looks its only young children and teens that say anything personally I enjoy the giggles the closest I've had to adults makeing comments while I've been at shops or whatever is when a young child starts to say something and they are interupted by a loud ssshhhhhh there have been times when I've passed a group of people when I've heard a whisper followed by laughter, I enjoy knowing I'm bringing some happiness into the world I don't notice the looks as much as I used to the only people who have been negative to the way I look is some TS Females who are stuck in believing that If you are outside the binary then you are "F'ed in the head".  I have had a bit of a hard time with family but they are coming around - slowly

That's amazing. I don't know if I ever had the courage to present the way you do (even if I wanted to). You rock.

Hi.

If you can understand being both male & female & think both ways at the same time & know you are not really male or female , yet are both ,  its not a sexual detail .

      As others know at age 10 i did not see any difference between male & female . So in a sence i was a mis match in my thinking or could not understand what i saw,  was not how i saw my self , hence being androgynous.

How do you explain you are not a male or a female & then say your both. people dont really get it so my friends know about my male background & accept me as a woman .

Its the whole person not just our mind or body ,
what do we say a 3rd  gender , im not stuck in the middle ,
  im happy in the middle . strange , different , yes & thats who i am.

If your not happy being who you are,  then we look at ways to bring about getting to that place where we are .

Ill be 63 in a few hours time & all iv been through to get were i am now has been more than worth it ,

This is the best part of my life , if i drop dead to morrow ill have had 8 out of 12  years of hell,  & 4 of  the most happyest time of my whole life . if i get 15 to 20 more  years thatll be just great,

   you look in the mirrow it lies it does not show the real you,
   only you can do that,or show that,

Am i a male or a female or both & really , does it matter .
To me ....NO....

...noeleena...

I'd like to integrate anima and animus within me, into union, perhaps becoming more fully woman, than biological women, and more fully male, as males. Yet transcend these both, become the spirit of marriage. Man-Woman. Mother-Father. Carl Jung has described this process, in his psychology of alchemy.

I'd also like to be absolutely pure, light, and cold like snow, so that no desirous or erotic thought, or wish, or disappointment, or grudge would interfere with my relations with women.

If I could I would love to half transition - probably top surgery or just taking half-doses of T. But I wouldn't trust any doctors or therapists in my area to actually understand where I'm coming from. 

Quote from: Aiden James on August 10, 2010, 10:25:37 PM
If I could I would love to half transition - probably top surgery or just taking half-doses of T. But I wouldn't trust any doctors or therapists in my area to actually understand where I'm coming from. 

I have known it done.  I suspect that the results are not quite what you imagine them to be, but it is done.

- N

I personally would prefer to permanently rid myself of all body hair apart from the hair on my head, my eyebrows if they count and my pubes, I would prefer wider hips and to be thinner (hopefully I won't lose weight and find some ugly huge adam's apple underneath the flab on my neck. I definately want to get rid of my caveman brow ridge. As for my genitals, I couldn't care less what I had, but I would prefer to keep my one remaining testicle to use in order to become a parent if the opportunity arises in the future (although there is always adoption). I would prefer to have my hair longer than what is seen as normal masculine length hair that suits my face shape (I would also want to make it darker, as  although my hair is between dark dark brown and black, it often looks a lot lighter and I prefer to have very dark hair). I can't do much about my shoulders (which are normal masculine width) or my UK size 12 feet, but I could learn to accept them. At least my height of 176cm is short enough to be in the middle. As for breasts, I would be fine without them - that would probably be a step too far, personally.

I don't know where I identify...I've been living as male as much as I can for years...I feel that if I transition and pass as male and it turns out that it's not right for me that I'll have even more struggle transitioning to "something else." When I was in therapy I said absolutely anything and everything gender related until there was nothing left to say. I ended up analyzing everything that I did trying to figure out what the therapist would be thinking. I tried to figure out if I was doing things femininely or masculinely...if my masculinity meant male. It wasn't good.

I want to go on testosterone to make myself more masculine than I am right now (which is pretty darn feminine). I want top surgery or a major reduction but I'm scared of surgery.

i haven't encountered gate keepers, but then i was into fully transitioning. i was already "full time" when i started HRT. i'm now considering stopping things and just being gender queer, identifying more with gay men, rather than being a woman. i'm not sure why, though. i never get any grief for being trans -- everyone sees me as a woman no problem, so i'll probably get more grief if i quite HRT. and then there's the issue of does my 3yo still call me mommy? i hear of lesbian dads (i.e. butches), but haven't come across gay (male) moms.

hi
i'm italian and i'm doian a partial transition.
I'm search other people who are doing this.
I hope in that way to have more information because here in italy there aren't many people who are genderqueer or transgender in partial transitioning
thank's

Quote from: Fencesitter on August 08, 2010, 10:02:20 PM
That's amazing. I don't know if I ever had the courage to present the way you do (even if I wanted to). You rock.

Agreed-Kinkly has way more nerve than I do too.
I don't mind being a little odd, but I like to go for more menacing goth/punk than cute genderbent...

Kinkly-genderlicious!

Quote from: rite_of_inversion on October 12, 2010, 06:14:18 PM
Agreed-Kinkly has way more nerve than I do too.
I don't mind being a little odd, but I like to go for more menacing goth/punk than cute genderbent...

Kinkly-genderlicious!

Thanks all
Its not so much about nerve It is more if I try hiding who I am again then I'll be back in a dark place that could end with me taking my own life. I don't want to die but if I can't be me then I can't really be at all.
I'm constently gaining more confidence and pushing the envelope further I'm more likely to wear a skirt then shorts most
of the time and go out in dress at least once a week.  always changing always pushing the limits.

Thought you might be interested in him. He partially transitioned.

I'm partially transitioning. My therapist knows but...my GP (who perscribes my T) doesn't.
I'm female born, and started T almost a year ago now..yet still pass female. (quite well...might add) I've got fully male range T and E yet my body has only very little body hair, very light beard coming in (hooray!!!) and hasn't shifted my fat any (yet).
I wear skirts even when my beard is showing (though again...only a year on T so it's light and kinda thin..)
Even when I'm binding I'm seen as female which can be frustrating. My voice has dropped WELL into baratone/bass range yet I'm still assumed female on the phone and in person. My cadance is very female...so that's my "androgyn" balance to my voice
I'm going to be getting a breast reduction because I don't care for their current size. It's too much and I can't bind much. (DDD cup)
I have gotten clit growth from the T...but I'm now considering a meto...well...just a release really. I could care less about standing to pee...but I'd like my bits down there to look more androgyn too. That's still in the "thinking about it" phase...but the breast reduction is coming up in a few months likely! Woot!!
Even thought I'm read female almost always...I feel good. I feel balanced. My female side and my male side feel really...good...there's always work to do...the balance can always get out of whack...which is the MASSIVE struggle and difficulty when it comes to transitioning as an androgyn. You never know how far hormones are going to take you!! As I continue to be on T...it's assumed that I will continue to masculinze. We'll see...and balance where and how I can.

I'm suppose in a way a good number of ftms go through only a partial transition. I've done everything but bottom surgery. The thing is though that the bottom surgery is foremost in people's minds when they think of transsexuals. I guess I'll always be physically androgyne.