Quote from: CaitJ on December 20, 2010, 05:37:20 PM
You're 23. Men are a dime a dozen. 'Normal' is an illusion.

I know, i meant "normal" as in something stable, consistent, predictable, simple (??)
I know having a relationship with a trans will never be any of the above, but i try to make sure i have as 'normal' of a life as i could.

but we shall see if he comes back or not...if he does then i guess he isnt a dime a dozen is he?

Quote from: KillBelle on December 20, 2010, 05:47:27 PM
I know, i meant "normal" as in something stable, consistent, predictable, simple (??)

I have all of the above. My fiance and I live in the suburbs, both have decent jobs, live pretty ordinary lives and are by no means 'complicated'.

QuoteI know having a relationship with a trans will never be any of the above, but i try to make sure i have as 'normal' of a life as i could.

Calling yourself 'a trans' might be part of that problem. Try 'a trans person' on for size.

Quote from: KillBelle on December 20, 2010, 05:33:59 PM
yeah...it doesnt look too good. he came home, packed his stuff...and said hes going to be away for a while. well...there goes my hope of having a normal family life =\

I'm sorry to hear that. As Cait said you are young, there lots of people out there.  In many ways, this is your first relationship.  Live and learn.  I just wish he could have tried to stay.

Just hang in there, hon.

Quote from: Epigania on December 20, 2010, 06:00:18 PM
I'm sorry to hear that. As Cait said you are young, there lots of people out there.  In many ways, this is your first relationship.  Live and learn.  I just wish he could have tried to stay.

Just hang in there, hon.

thank you, that means more to me than you know..

Quote from: KillBelle on December 20, 2010, 06:10:26 PM
thank you, that means more to me than you know..

In an attempt to look at the bright side of all of this, think of all the relaxing personal time you'll have for awhile not getting his beer and chips during football games!

Well it sucks that it didn't work out as well as it could have... but better now maybe than when there was a lot more time invested, for both of you.

I wouldn't completely lose heart straight away though.... Give the guy a chance, it's a hell of a lot to process after all, he might be thinking it all out and not decided what to do yet.

Quote from: pixiegirl on December 20, 2010, 06:48:41 PM
Well it sucks that it didn't work out as well as it could have... but better now maybe than when there was a lot more time invested, for both of you.

I wouldn't completely lose heart straight away though.... Give the guy a chance, it's a hell of a lot to process after all, he might be thinking it all out and not decided what to do yet.

I agree.  give him a chance to process the news.  He is probably trying to figure out what to make of everything.

Quote from: KillBelle on December 20, 2010, 05:33:59 PM
yeah...it doesnt look too good. he came home, packed his stuff...and said hes going to be away for a while. well...there goes my hope of having a normal family life =\

No it doesn't.

As other have said, you just start agian. My own experience suggests it happens when you stop trying.

You did the right thing by telling him. There was nothing wrong with the words you used. But you, yourself suggested that he might not take it so well.

Life isn't going to be easy for us. But we just have to keep trying. That you've come so far as to pass completely with this guy says a lot for how far you come.

But you still have a way to go. As have the rest of us.

Take care lovely one.

Quote from: spacial on December 20, 2010, 07:54:14 PM
......

You did the right thing by telling him. .........

Yeah?? I dunno I view that as a subjective opinion. Not a factual "right".

Quote from: spacial on December 20, 2010, 07:54:14 PM
But you, yourself suggested that he might not take it so well.

Actually, she initially claimed he'd be 100% okay with it: "I ask him how he would feel if i told him i was TS and he said, that he would still love me unconditionally and nothing would ever change."
Then again, I'm not buying this whole scenario - I reserve the right to be skeptical.

KillBelle,
My heart goes out to you dear.  Are you ok?  It is tough to see him go. He may go out and get his head cleared and come back. Time will tell. I just hope you are ok?
Are you worried about him hurting you?
Amelia

This whole story is....strange 

Quote from: Muffin on December 20, 2010, 10:09:00 PM
Yeah?? I dunno I view that as a subjective opinion. Not a factual "right".

Possibly. Though Pam has said she was looking forward to a normal married life. She has said she would tell him before marrying.

Quote from: AnitaLife on December 20, 2010, 11:53:24 PM
This whole story is....strange 

I'm having flash backs of school reunions....kinda.....

QuoteThen again, I'm not buying this whole scenario - I reserve the right to be skeptical.

The Internet is full of want to be novelists.

Quote from: lisagurl on December 21, 2010, 08:26:56 AM
The Internet is full of want to be novelists.

Oh indeed. I'm reminded of Creative Writing classes back when I was 12.

Quote from: CaitJ on December 21, 2010, 01:04:23 PM
Oh indeed. I'm reminded of Creative Writing classes back when I was 12.

even though i also feel that might be the case, it might be better to just give her the benefit of the doubt.

if it is true these comments can be pretty hurtful at a time like this.

Quote from: Eve of Chaos on December 21, 2010, 01:30:21 PM
even though i also feel that might be the case, it might be better to just give her the benefit of the doubt.

if it is true these comments can be pretty hurtful at a time like this.

I agree.  Someone going through this sort of thing is hurting and these comments are hurtful. 

You may have doubts about authenticity of someone, but unless you have proof, you should keep your trap shut.  There are millions of people out there living their own lives.  It isn't our place to judge them and their circumstances.

People come here to meet others going through a similar experience, not be marginalized and accused in public.

people are going to hate, theres nothing you can do.  i just appreciate the kind words and whatever helpfulness i can get from whomever is genuine. It's been a really stressful last few days and im afraid to post any more updates because i have a feeling i will only get flamed some more.

It's sad to me that even within my own community there are people that are ready to go out of their way to hurt others...we spend so much time out in the world where we have to hide....and even within our own circle we have to hide. Oh well that is the way of life, i wish i could delete this topic but i cannot seem to do so.