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hair help! :(

Started by Britney♥Bieber, December 31, 2010, 04:05:08 PM

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MeghanAndrews

Quote from: Britney♥Bieber on January 01, 2011, 12:50:12 PM
So all you do is straighten it?
Today the sides are curling out in huge curls it's so ugly :(
Well I'll see about getting it trimmed. :'(
Yes, all I do is straighten it. I blow dry it, but I don't use heat protectorant (I used to when it was your length and first growing out but by the time I wasn't anymore). Heat protectant, although I LOVE the way it adds shine and makes it look healthy, really weighs my hair down after like day two.

The things with your sides being curly, it's that in between stage. OMG, I remember when my hair was growing out during my andro period before transition, like when I knew I was transitioning but took a year or so to grow hair and get electro, it was the same way! Here's a pic:

Like this was at that crazy in between stage, like the I-have-no-clue-what-to-do-with-this-hair stage


This picture is like 4-5 months later I think (both pre-FFS pics so don't be scurred, lol)

Then as it gets longer you can do different things with it (lol, that's my andro look, in the boy's bathroom at work (see the urinal off to the left there?) that was the stage where I was getting weird looks from guys, like 'this dude is soooo gay.' But at this point I was flat-ironing it and I got it styled by a girl, came out to her (she was lesbian, she was cool) and I said 'please just make it feminine a little bit" and she suggested the style, which is similar to yours now, Britney, where the part is. Once it gets longer you can flat-iron it, just get a little 1" ceramic flat-iron to put the shorter length hair in there.


Another suggestion I have it to use a hair band or something to put in your hair and not pull it back from your face but wear it like a little higher up like these two girls:



or use these or fabric:



Again, I'm not an expert by a long stretch, but it's just kind of stuff I did myself when I was at the in between hair. Give the hair time to grow, in another year or two (I know, but it will FLY by and you'll be there before you KNOW IT!) it'll be where you want it. All my best, Meghan

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Britney♥Bieber

Wow you've come so far! It's incredible how gorgeous you are in your new avatar!!! :o
And thanks for the tips, I was recently looking at head bands at target to see which where cute. Are you suggesting I get one and wear it with my hair straight?

And I already bought the shampoo James suggested, since he used it pre transition. I felt a difference immediately after rinsing the conditioner out. And I'm probably gonna get it trimmed today after my mom is done cleaning.

MeghanAndrews

Hey Britney, I was suggesting wearing it NOW and experimenting and seeing how you like it. I can almost guarantee that you will change your hairstyles about 472 times in the next few years :)
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Britney♥Bieber


Here's what my hair looks like when it's natural, air dried, not product etc. I just washed it this morning and it let it dry.
I don't think their is anything I could do that would look good, unless I straighten it and that doesn't even look great. I'm just going to take advantage of days in and not do anything lol. And I trust you. Once my hairs long enough I'm going crazy I cannot wait!

Glenn

Quote from: Britney♥Bieber on January 02, 2011, 03:29:24 PM

Here's what my hair looks like when it's natural, air dried, not product etc. I just washed it this morning and it let it dry.
I don't think their is anything I could do that would look good, unless I straighten it and that doesn't even look great. I'm just going to take advantage of days in and not do anything lol. And I trust you. Once my hairs long enough I'm going crazy I cannot wait!


Um Brit!!!

I'd kill for bouncy curly natural hair like that.  Let it grow and leave it alone for god sakes.  It's beautiful and stop straightening it and adding product.  Your hair in that picture is full and shiny and healthy looking and you are so pretty with that natural look!


Hugs you tight while mumbling in jealousy.
Simone
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Simone V on January 02, 2011, 09:49:59 PM

Um Brit!!!

I'd kill for bouncy curly natural hair like that.  Let it grow and leave it alone for god sakes.  It's beautiful and stop straightening it and adding product.  Your hair in that picture is full and shiny and healthy looking and you are so pretty with that natural look!


Hugs you tight while mumbling in jealousy.
Simone

I think it looks terrible, that picture of me is awful :'(
So frizzy!
But thanks!

VeronikaFTH

Wow, Britney, you're going to have beautifully curly, long hair once it's grown out! I'd play that up if I were you... but unfortunately you're going to be fighting the frizzies. If it was long and you left it curly, but de-frizzed it, it would be fantastic. It looks cute short too, very 1920's!  All you need is a cloche hat, and you'd be the bee's knees!  :)

My hair is not curly on top, but is curly on the sides and back, and quite thick, and dry.. so I fight the frizzies too. My hair kind of looks like Meghan's morning picture, actually, if I don't do anything to it. Mine's a bit wavier, but it looks frizzy like that.

I'm with everyone else about not washing your hair much. In the winter when it's cold, and I'm always inside, I only wash my hair maybe 1x a week. I'm not sweating, it doesn't get oily (especially on HRT), it doesn't get dirty... so why wash it?

I'd just trim the split ends, make sure you're using products designed for your hair type, and use a deep conditioner once every few shampoos. Just make sure you use a clarifying shampoo before you deep condition to remove product buildup, especially if you use anti-frizz serums and the like, because they contain silicone, which coats and seals up hair shafts.
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japple

I know you have visions of what you want to look like but I think you should let your hair be natural and wash it less.  I thought that last photo make you look like more of a classic beauty.  It's not long enough yet but in the mean time you can get some headbands and maybe use a fall to help the front a little. It'd be updo-ey.  Kind of like this but longer in the back? Windswept Bride Think Meg Ryan.

You shouldn't damage it with flat irons or product..try to be patient and let it grow grow grow then get obsessed.
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: VeronikaFTH on January 03, 2011, 01:29:15 AM
Wow, Britney, you're going to have beautifully curly, long hair once it's grown out! I'd play that up if I were you... but unfortunately you're going to be fighting the frizzies. If it was long and you left it curly, but de-frizzed it, it would be fantastic. It looks cute short too, very 1920's!  All you need is a cloche hat, and you'd be the bee's knees!  :)

My hair is not curly on top, but is curly on the sides and back, and quite thick, and dry.. so I fight the frizzies too. My hair kind of looks like Meghan's morning picture, actually, if I don't do anything to it. Mine's a bit wavier, but it looks frizzy like that.

I'm with everyone else about not washing your hair much. In the winter when it's cold, and I'm always inside, I only wash my hair maybe 1x a week. I'm not sweating, it doesn't get oily (especially on HRT), it doesn't get dirty... so why wash it?

I'd just trim the split ends, make sure you're using products designed for your hair type, and use a deep conditioner once every few shampoos. Just make sure you use a clarifying shampoo before you deep condition to remove product buildup, especially if you use anti-frizz serums and the like, because they contain silicone, which coats and seals up hair shafts.

Yeah I'm going to get a trim soon. I've gotten a really good shampoo that helps prevent damage and split ends. After washing it, it felt so much softer and even looked a little better when it dried. And it's funny you mention that hat. I've tried a few on and I really like them but I don't think they'd match anything I wear. I think I'll buy one though. I do need a hat that I can wear on bad hair days. Until I can put it all in a pony tail =X

And I am excited for it to get long, so I can leave it curly. I love it but I just think the curls look sloppy and not very cute at this length. Probably just a bit of my hair dysphoria. That's been one of my biggest negatives about myself for a long time. I've envied girls and even boys with long hair and I always tried to grow it out but I always got fed up with it looking ugly and cut it, it's longer than it's ever been though! :D

Quote from: japple on January 03, 2011, 01:44:55 AM
I know you have visions of what you want to look like but I think you should let your hair be natural and wash it less.  I thought that last photo make you look like more of a classic beauty.  It's not long enough yet but in the mean time you can get some headbands and maybe use a fall to help the front a little. It'd be updo-ey.  Kind of like this but longer in the back? Windswept Bride Think Meg Ryan.

You shouldn't damage it with flat irons or product..try to be patient and let it grow grow grow then get obsessed.

I'm trying not to straighten it anymore. It makes no sense to do it for work since I wear a hat. =X haha. I just finally got to a point where I didn't despise my hair and appearance when it was straight so I went crazy and straightened it wherever I went. =/

CaitJ

Quote from: Britney♥Bieber on January 02, 2011, 03:29:24 PM

Here's what my hair looks like when it's natural, air dried, not product etc. I just washed it this morning and it let it dry.
I don't think their is anything I could do that would look good, unless I straighten it and that doesn't even look great. I'm just going to take advantage of days in and not do anything lol. And I trust you. Once my hairs long enough I'm going crazy I cannot wait!

I actually like you hair like this.
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BridgetBby

hey there , i know what your going through with damaged hair believe me i have been through my fair share of peroxide and straighteners , im trying to recover my hair now, but before i used to trim my hair all the time thinking it would stop the damage but guess where it got me, my hair is still the same length after 5 years lol
heres somethings ive done to my hair , this is just the tip of the iceberg believe me ! lmao



if you know anything about being platinum blonde its that it damages your hair so badddd, bleaching and perms/relaxers are the most damaging , so avoid those with all costs!
right now im using "Carol's daughter Hair balm", i like it alot as my hair get very dry i use "sebastian conditioning treatment" after i shampoo with garnier damage control and a few drops of tea tree oil to clean my scalp, that one thing too, your beautiful hair begins at your scalp, alot of balding its caused by a build up of sebrum, so its best to try to keep your scalp clean. i only wash my hair like once a week tho, if that, shampoo is basically a detergent so it drys out your hair , sometimes when i wash my hair i just wash it with conditioner and no shampoo unless my hair is really dirty like i got some nut in it or something lmao. thats a thing that alot of curly hair grils do , bc curly hair is much dryer. any who i wont talk forever so good luck on your journey sis.
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Vexing on January 03, 2011, 05:39:18 AM
I actually like you hair like this.

Aww thanks. :D

and @BridgetBby thanks for the info! :D You're cute. :)

cryan91

Quote from: Helena on December 31, 2010, 04:11:41 PM


as for products i use shampoo and conditioners made by a uk company called lush...they love my hair and i love them...it may be worth splashing a wee bit of cash on something similar

http://www.lush.co.uk/


I 2nd this! Such wonderful products, all natural! I use the "BIG" shampoo. Make a trip into NYC every time I need a new supply :P
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Rileyyy

i've wandered over from dude-land to come share the things that i used to do with my hair when i was presenting as female - hope i'm not butting in!

anyway. i've gone through my fair share of damaging hair products, and i can tell you that there was nothing that ever worked better for me than a good trim and an even better conditioner. i used to use the herbal essences "hello hydration" conditioner, and i swear that stuff worked miracles. not only that, but you can get it at the drugstore.

a few ladies have said that you should wash your hair less - i've never lived by that rule. i still wash my hair every time i shower, which is usually every day. i've never found reducing the amount of times i wash my hair to be helpful, in fact it just makes my hair more greasy. on that note, when i had long hair, i would avoid the "deeper-cleaning" sort of shampoos, such as head & shoulders. when my hair was long i found that using head & shoulders would dry out my hair more than washing it every day did. hence why i'm going to stress the importance of using a conditioner! i went through a wide array of conditioners, and my hair always looked better when i used them. my favorites though were frizz-tamers by companies like pantene, and ones that included hydration formulas by herbal essences. suave also has some pretty good conditioners, the strawberry one in particular was a favorite of mine :P

about the trim - i can definitely see why you're hesitant about it, but i learned the hard way that sometimes you have to sacrifice length for style. before coming out, and when i still presented as female, i had my hair the same length as yours, and let me tell you - the possibilities for hair that length are endless. not to mention the fact that your hair will grow faster once it's healthier ;)

i used to straighten my hair, but i didn't use a flat iron... i used a curling iron. haha i know it sounds weird, but the results, at least for me, were much more desirable than those a flat iron could have given me. when i used the curling iron to straighten my hair, my hair ended up being more bouncy and easier to style, whereas with a flat iron it just turned rod straight and lifeless. i used to do this every day, so when i started to see my hair slowly getting frizzier... and frizzier... and frizzier, i decided to try out a few products. i found the alberto miracle  mist heat defence worked like a dream, and not only did it protect and defrizz my hair, but made it glossy, too.

that's all the stuff i can think of right now, but if you want to know anything else, just send a pm my way!

p.s. you're stunning, and you look absolutely gorgeous with curly hair!
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VeronikaFTH

Quote from: Helena on December 31, 2010, 04:11:41 PM
as for products i use shampoo and conditioners made by a uk company called lush...they love my hair and i love them...it may be worth splashing a wee bit of cash on something similar

http://www.lush.co.uk/

I've used one or two of their products, they are very nice.. the problem is that they don't store any of their product in packaging in the stores, and walking in the door is like being hit in the face by an invisible, perfumed boxing glove. I can only stand to be in there for about a minute before I have to leave, or my eyes will start burning. Most of their products smell lovely, but it's just overwhelming in the store... .
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Rye on January 04, 2011, 12:49:22 PM
i've wandered over from dude-land to come share the things that i used to do with my hair when i was presenting as female - hope i'm not butting in!

anyway. i've gone through my fair share of damaging hair products, and i can tell you that there was nothing that ever worked better for me than a good trim and an even better conditioner. i used to use the herbal essences "hello hydration" conditioner, and i swear that stuff worked miracles. not only that, but you can get it at the drugstore.

a few ladies have said that you should wash your hair less - i've never lived by that rule. i still wash my hair every time i shower, which is usually every day. i've never found reducing the amount of times i wash my hair to be helpful, in fact it just makes my hair more greasy. on that note, when i had long hair, i would avoid the "deeper-cleaning" sort of shampoos, such as head & shoulders. when my hair was long i found that using head & shoulders would dry out my hair more than washing it every day did. hence why i'm going to stress the importance of using a conditioner! i went through a wide array of conditioners, and my hair always looked better when i used them. my favorites though were frizz-tamers by companies like pantene, and ones that included hydration formulas by herbal essences. suave also has some pretty good conditioners, the strawberry one in particular was a favorite of mine :P

about the trim - i can definitely see why you're hesitant about it, but i learned the hard way that sometimes you have to sacrifice length for style. before coming out, and when i still presented as female, i had my hair the same length as yours, and let me tell you - the possibilities for hair that length are endless. not to mention the fact that your hair will grow faster once it's healthier ;)

i used to straighten my hair, but i didn't use a flat iron... i used a curling iron. haha i know it sounds weird, but the results, at least for me, were much more desirable than those a flat iron could have given me. when i used the curling iron to straighten my hair, my hair ended up being more bouncy and easier to style, whereas with a flat iron it just turned rod straight and lifeless. i used to do this every day, so when i started to see my hair slowly getting frizzier... and frizzier... and frizzier, i decided to try out a few products. i found the alberto miracle  mist heat defence worked like a dream, and not only did it protect and defrizz my hair, but made it glossy, too.

that's all the stuff i can think of right now, but if you want to know anything else, just send a pm my way!

p.s. you're stunning, and you look absolutely gorgeous with curly hair!

Aww thank you!! :D I won't mind having curly hair once it's long I just hate hate hate the way it looks now, even when it's straight but when it's straight it's a little better. I've always been nuts over my hair =/
And I'll look into those products if I need to in the future. I bought mane n tail and it says to leave the conditioner in for 2 minutes so I left it in and after rinsing it felt noticeably softer and smoother, even when it dried out. BUT if in the long run it does nothing for me, then I'll look into something else :)

Debra

Quote from: Britney♥Bieber on December 31, 2010, 05:11:43 PM
and yeah I was nervous about making videos but people like you and Jerica and this one girl Jordan and some others that I watched, really helped me a lot. :D So I wanted to put myself out there to do what you did for me for other people.


awwww yay! =)

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Britney♥Bieber


cryan91

Britney, I also recommend these two remarkable hair care companies:
Ojon http://www.ojon.com/
Wen http://www.wenhaircare.com/
Their products are godly! x

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PixieBoy

Yep, I'll butt into your thread as well, Britney.
I currently use the shampoo cake Soak 'n Float, made by Lush. A shampoo cake is actually just like a bar of soap, but it's shampoo in bar form instead of soap. This shampoo smells like tar, smoke, bacon and newly-laden asphalt; the smell might freak you out. It works well with my hair, though. I've got dandruff problems and also greasy hair (the typical teenage problems, along with lots of acne, heh). This shampoo has made my hair feel nicer somehow, less prone to be dandruffy and fall off. Yeah, when I was in middle school, I had awful amounts of dandruff, my scalp itched all the time and my hair kept falling out (like a cat or something, I left hair wherever I went).
Now, with the Lush shampoo, it feels somehow healthier. This could also be due to high school being less stressing, but I think the shampoo also plays a part in it.
It's also a relaxing feeling to rub the shampoo into your hair, it's more like a scalp massage than when you use regular, liquid shampoo. The Lush products are not tested on animals and enviroment-friendly as well. Expensive but good.

I love your hair when it's curly, don't straighten it! You look like a femme fatale, like I've said before. The kind of hair many women would love to have, those beautiful curls. It doesn't look frissy or "random", it looks like a "planned" hairstyle. Very pretty.
...that fey-looking freak kid with too many books and too much bodily fat
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