...all feminine guys are gay and all gay guys want to be girls....





I feel a headache coming on...!

Well, what do I know? But about changing therapist?

This one doesn't seem to really understand the human sexuality and identity!

Bullstuff. You've got to get another therapist. I wouldn't take that from anyone, and you shouldn't either. You deserve a better, open minded, and understanding therapist.

Don't listen to a word of that. Just because you aren't into being macho doesn't make you any less of a man. We may all come in different types, but we're all still men. None of us are the exact same, and you've got to find a therapist that values you're own unique version of manhood.

You might want to check out a new therapist..

Is this the same Christian therapist or a different one?

I think I would have cried from laughing so hard. You seriously need to get a new therapist.

Quote from: Shayne on January 04, 2011, 09:30:28 PM
Is this the same Christian therapist or a different one?

same one

Lol what a numbnut therapist YOU have! I can't count how many fem guys I've met on both hands! One of my best friends is super girly, he's into fashion, likes to be cutesy, squeals like a girl, but he's definitely not MTF or anything. He's not even hard gay, he's bi. S'just who he is

Get a new shrink. Seriously.

Quote from: Alex201 on January 04, 2011, 09:41:07 PM
same one

D: Why are you still seeing them?

Why would gay guys want to be girls?

I definitely recommend another therapist. This one has no clue what she's talking about.

99 bottle of beer on the wall.. 99 bottles of beer..
(Sorry couldn't resist)
Yep, let's reassign everyone too feminine to be a guy  as female..
First off any guy that can spell eloquence should be assigned female no matter what.
Any women who like sports other then participating in  topless wrestling, please date a guy or become one, and no watching sports isn't a date.. (pictures please) Shirts can look very similar so maybe we can start with beer preferences to tell folks apart. Budweiser is ok, bud light a bit suspicious. Guinness will put hair on the chests of any woman so we'll just leave that one out. Belgian white beer.. Hmm that is very summery sitting on a terrace like (hardly a good time for any skirt chasing couch potato to spend his time..
Don't like beer? What? Well we have an operation for you!   
Gay guys.. Ok hands off each other, here's the deal either you can start sleeping with women or become one.. Just let us know ok?
Lesbians... Uh umm are those biceps real??



listen we were raised as female as such when we try to counter some of the socialization we grew up with we feel we feel we're feminine. Others may even see us that way until we get past that but that's learned behavior.
What makes a man? What's masculine? How many stereotypes do we have to satisfy to be considered masculine enough to be a transguy anyway?

Good luck! Oh and get a new therapist

Quote from: Shayne on January 04, 2011, 10:02:16 PM
D: Why are you still seeing them?

I don't dare say I don't like her the rents' would freak

Quote from: Devyn on January 04, 2011, 10:05:38 PM
Why would gay guys want to be girls?

My thoughts exactly

It's certainly uncomfortable to be in disagreement with your parents, but you're an adult. This therapist is clearly not just incompetent and misinformed, but potentially harmful to your psychological wellbeing. Your parents have no right or legal standing for interfering with your therapy, she's clearly a waste of money, and you hate her. My ex had a therapist like that. He stopped seeing her, his parents don't believe he's trans and did freak that their choice therapist was rejected, but now they've backed off enough that he has input as to who he sees. It's the only reason he's been able to recover from the damage that therapist did to him and actually start seeing a decent one. He's also 3 years younger than you. Unless your parents will throw you out of the house or cut off all financial support because you're voicing your opinion, I'd just quit that therapist. It's the only rational choice.

I try to be open minded to most approaches, and I know it's true that some people who go for gender issues realize that they are not trans.  However, it's important to find someone who is there to help you find yourself, not guide you towards a specified "norm."  It sounds like this woman is ignoring all proven psychological facts to push you into being a girl, and I can't imagine this approach helping anyone, even, in the end, your parents.  Would it be possible to set up a session without your parents' knowledge with another person?  If you could, it would give you something to compare her to when talking with your parents.  I'm sorry you're still having so much trouble with them. 

Edit: As a side note, if all men are masculine and all women are feminine, then the majority of people I know are neither.  I can't think of anyone off the top of my head whom I would describe as being completely one or the other.

I highly recommend you to change therapist. Talk your parents about you feeling pressed, upset or something, and uncomfortable with her, any excuse you think they would see as valid to change therapist, not just "she doesn't know a thing about her job!". Lee's idea about talking with a different one in a different session seems good for comparison.

I'm a bit tired of the femininine thing, as I'm quite feminine myself. I mean, I like to look good, grow my hair, have my nails clean and not too short, and wear tight clothing. But I'm not gay, not a girl either. Why there're so much people that are so closed minded? After all, I don't remember anyone blaming lesbian a girl who had her hair cut to shoulder lenght, but there're a load of boys called gays by having their hair cut to the same lenght? Is this reasonable at all?  ???I had almost physical fight with my therapist wanting to cut my hair by herself.

Quote from: Lee on January 05, 2011, 03:11:03 AM
Edit: As a side note, if all men are masculine and all women are feminine, then the majority of people I know are neither.  I can't think of anyone off the top of my head whom I would describe as being completely one or the other.

That's true. Even american superheros have their own feminine side. They care for their hair and they wear stocking. Marvel teached the world you can be a super-man-ly even if you're wearing blue stocking and red underwear.

You only need 2 minutes alone with a psychology school-book to know without a doubt that this "therapist" is not qualified in any manner.
You need to tell your parents that you can not see this therapist anymore due to them not being qualified.
You can't keep going to an unqualified person and expect any sort of reasonable result of any kind.

It's not about finding a therapist that'll agree with you, it's about finding one that is qualified.

There are a few feminine guys in my FTM group.  They all pass really well and seem happy with their transitions and secure in their identities.  If I met any of them in another context, I wouldn't have guessed they weren't born male.  There is a BIG difference between being a feminine man and being a woman.

I'm lucky to have a therapist who specializes in working with trans people.  She says that being trans is really a form of being intersex - if you're FTM, your brain actually functions like that of a male, even though the body you were born with is female.  It's hard to live as a member of your assigned sex because your brain just doesn't work that way, no matter what your personality is like, what your interests are, etc.  That's why transition tends to make people's lives easier in many ways.

The point here is that your gender identity is just one part of who you are.  It's an important part of who you are, but it doesn't dictate the rest of your personality.