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why am i so scaerd of this..

Started by Hazard "AJ", January 08, 2011, 08:55:19 PM

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Hazard "AJ"

Hey whats up guys...
me again., im not sure if iv posted this before. my biggest fear about Starting T and it might not be a big deal to other trans. but for me it is... My fear is becoming atracted to men. I used to fill like i liked men as a kid. from the age of about 10-16-17 i used to obbsessed with eminem. and i used to get exsited when i saw him and i wanted everythink about him. were my head is right now.  i fill like i wanned his life style as i usd to copy him walk and look, But why am i sceard of liking men.. to me it dont seem right being with a man. to me ( and no hate on gays, i have nothing aggenst gay people) but to me men r ment to be with women. if u gay plzz dont take that the wrong way, its all gd. NO HATE 4 REAL..! but to me. its a no no.. i couldnt imgen myself being a man with anouther man... so i dunno.. i think i worryed T will change that.. I look at videos of people on T and think i want that i get exsited. but i think thats my biggest fear... not sure if other have the same fear ot had the same fear.. Oh btw forgot to tell everyone.. Im not sure if u have read my old post or remeber me from old post but i never told m dad about me... cuz i thought he wasnt the kind to understand well 4 years ago he prob would have killed me.. but yes i told him... well not me my sister did.. and the 1st night he said he didnt wanna now the next day he had a talk with me, and now his trying to understand asking qs and he even says he loves me everytime he leaves. (thats a mirical 4 m dad) anyways thanks guys...


heres my fb.. add me whoever u r.. as long as u ant dwb cuz ur ass would be deleted and reported

http://www.facebook.com/Hazardphotos
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Renard

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Hazard "AJ"

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Kitpup

"So, there is no specific correlation between taking testosterone and suddenly becoming gay."
You is what you is.
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Hazard "AJ"

Quote from: Kitian on January 08, 2011, 09:16:26 PM
"So, there is no specific correlation between taking testosterone and suddenly becoming gay."
You is what you is.


I now but for some reson... being with a man isnt right to me its just wrong even in the body i in now... i just can not think of myself with a man... im just worryed T will change that
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Kitpup

Changing one part of you, something as base as a hormone, may make you more attractive to some men but won't make you (specifically, in my non-medical opinion) attracted to men. You don't want to be with em, so you won't.
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Nero

As has been stated, T will not make you gay. I suspect that guys who have found themselves attracted to men after T were just suppressing their feelings before. Maybe out of fear of being seen as women.
I wouldn't worry about having been obsessed with Eminem. Lots of hetero boys wanted to be like him too.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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Hazard "AJ"

Quote from: Forum Admin on January 08, 2011, 09:26:26 PM
As has been stated, T will not make you gay. I suspect that guys who have found themselves attracted to men after T were just suppressing their feelings before. Maybe out of fear of being seen as women.
I wouldn't worry about having been obsessed with Eminem. Lots of hetero boys wanted to be like him too.

Yeh i now that,  and as i got older i thought to myself if i was attracted to him in a sexual way why did i want to dress and have his lifestyle.. also. when i look at a mans body or think of myself with a man anywere near me it fills wrong it just fills wierd and not right, somtimes i think i might just be suppressing  it.  but like i said that done exspalane why i dont like the look of mens body or the thought of being with a man.. it just dont fill nice or right. the thought of a man being near me sharing a bed, even walking down the street with me.. :P maybe im just being stuped. i should really worry about what im attracted to. but i am.. and i HATE the thought of being with a man HATE IT!
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Arch

Hazard, it's awesome that your father is taking it so well.

I've run across a number of trans people whose sexual orientation shifted somewhat, but very few who completely flip-flopped and went from completely gay to completely straight, or the other way around. You know what I think? I think most of them felt a lot freer after they started transition. Maybe they were just starting to loosen up and admit to things they were afraid of, or try things that they were afraid to try. So many of us keep ourselves locked down, and transition frees us up. You could open a new thread and find people who went from gay to straight or straight to gay, and read their theories on why it happened. I wonder how many responses you would get. Hm, maybe I'll start a thread like that.

Almost everyone I've seen has stayed essentially the same. Some folks who are bi or pansexual have noted that they like men more or like women more now...but they were bi to begin with. Some people who were attracted to one sex only have found that they would at least consider the other sex. But that's not a complete 180-degree shift.

I suppose it's possible that taking T has some effect on orientation, but I've never seen any evidence that these shifts are from hormones.

At some point, those of us who DO start hormones have to take some kind of leap and decide that the potential benefits outweigh the potential harm. But I don't think you have much to worry about with regard to orientation.
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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Arch

Quote from: Forum Admin on January 08, 2011, 09:26:26 PM
I suspect that guys who have found themselves attracted to men after T were just suppressing their feelings before. Maybe out of fear of being seen as women.

I think this is a very convincing explanation.
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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xAndrewx

Dude T won't make you gay(I can't say that 100% but I'm pretty sure). And seriously I consider myself a hetero man (although if I met the man of my dreams I would be with him) but bottom line I'm not really attracted to men and I have a huge love for Eminem. I find my attraction is that I wish I could be like him, wear his clothes, look like him, but I'm not in love with him and it sounds like you are the same.

I think forum admin and Arch are right. The people who end up gay are people who were gay before but suppressing their feelings. Once they got on T they felt free and comfortable enough to admit it to themselves.  Oh and the link the first person posted was myths meaning they are fears that aren't real.

Hazard "AJ"

Im pretty sure im into women. and im kinda sure it will stay that way based on i can imagen myself with a women. and love the look of then with and without clouths. i have a big imagenation and lets just say i imagen alot with women all the time.. when i see a women naked. i would love yo do ->-bleeped-<- to that women..  but never with a man. i think iv had thought but it felt wrong i remeber as a kid having boyfriend and didnt even like holding his hand cuz it felt wrong. it felt really wired. and it wasnt the age or nothin. cuz i had a female friend and kinda had moments with her... and i felt more cunfterbal with her then i did with a male friend.
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Hazard "AJ"

I also forgot to put that i am a pretty open minded person. and and pretty conferdent and pretty comferbal with myself being trans. so im sure if i liked guys i would addmit it..so
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Sean

Agree with everything said about how orientation works.

Just wanted to add: if your orientation DOES change, SO WHAT???

If you really really don't have a problem with gay people or being gay, then why would you care if you became gay? Because having sex with men grosses you out? Guess what, if your orientation shifted and you were gay, you would no longer hate the idea of men being with men.

Also, your "Men are SUPPOSED to be with women" ideas are pretty homophobic, even if you swear up and down that you aren't. It's a lot like saying that someone who is born in a female body is SUPPOSED to be a woman. So...you might want to tone it down a notch.

You're probably not gay, and if you aren't, then taking T won't make you gay. But you probably ARE just a touch homophobic, so please try and check what is so scary to you about "the gay" that you are acting that way.
In Soviet Russa, Zero Divides by You!
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Hazard "AJ"

I really didnt mean for it to come out like that. I have gay and les friends. But I think I was ment to say that being with a guy isnt right to me.. Not that is wasnt right 4 everyone. ... But the idea os me being in a relationship or any kind of sexual way  and dont take this the wrong way makes me fill wierd kinda like the filling I get when I think about myself as a women it dont fill right.
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Berren

Eh, I had/have this kind of fear. Possibly broadening my sexuality is one of the few cons T has for me. But, reading this thread has made me feel a lot better about it already. I've always liked how a guy looks, not sexually, but just that "I wish I looked like that" feeling. I've never felt attracted to men in the other way, and I was always kind of baffled at how women were supposed to have sex (this is when I was IDing as female). I'm kind of in the same boat as Hazard on that one, but I'm pretty sure, even if T does make like men even a little, that I won't be with one ever.
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ALX

You know I used to feel really guilty. My first ever fantasy was a gay male fantasy. I felt bad because I am not a bio guy no matter how badly I'd want to be. I felt that since gay guys are into other guys that meant I had no place there.
Some guys really are like that, but sometimes you come across guys that see you as you are, that and there are guys who actually like FtMs lol bottom line, for me changing the way I see myself opened the door to be okay with my sexuality as well as my gender. My answers and yours will probably be different but what is the same is that  you really need to come to terms with yourself. Let the rest sort itself out ;)
GL
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Shadowlyc

T won't change that. o_o I'm on T and still only attracted to women. No questions, no doubts.
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Miniar

T hasn't changed my orientation one bit, but then, I'm pansexual.



"Everyone who has ever built anywhere a new heaven first found the power thereto in his own hell" - Nietzsche
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Arch

Quote from: Miniar on January 09, 2011, 06:17:14 PMT hasn't changed my orientation one bit, but then, I'm pansexual.

I thought you were panwonderful.

Hazard, I get where you're coming from--being gay isn't right for YOU--but Sean makes a good point. If, by some unlikely occurrence, you do become somewhat interested in men, then it will be right for you to be interested in men. You would probably have to adjust, of course. And if you stay attracted to women but have only a little attraction to men, you do get to decide whom to have a relationship with. You don't have to act on every little attraction you have.

It seems to be very rare that anyone does a complete one-eighty and goes from totally straight to totally gay, or the other way around--and there's no evidence that the T had anything to do with that. But I suspect that the people who go through that change make the adjustment and get on with their lives.

I hope you're getting some sort of clarity on this issue. Navigating all of our little worries and fears (and the big ones) can be pretty intimidating.
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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