According to my friend who still refuses to call me a guy, my new hair cut looks girlier than my grown-out hair did.

And to top it off, today was a bad day in general. I actually liked my hair until she said that though. I've told her I'm trans so many times and she still insists on saying things that she knows I don't want to hear.

I'm never going to win.

I would literally do anything for it by this point.
I'm barely surviving without it.
Well, actually, ever since I found out you could take testosterone to become more male, I've wanted it desperately. But that's beside the point.

I don't know how much longer I can wait. :/

Man if she's known to give you a hard time then I wouldn't think your hair looks girlier just because she says it. You said you want T... have you been able to begin seeing a therapist yet? If not have you started looking into who you will see when you can afford to? Sometimes just the act of finding out what I would do when I could afford it helped me get through the insanely long wait. *hugs* hope you can start soon

Quote from: Andrew Scott on January 19, 2011, 12:02:05 PM
Man if she's known to give you a hard time then I wouldn't think your hair looks girlier just because she says it. You said you want T... have you been able to begin seeing a therapist yet? If not have you started looking into who you will see when you can afford to? Sometimes just the act of finding out what I would do when I could afford it helped me get through the insanely long wait. *hugs* hope you can start soon

She has been giving me a hard time about the whole transsexual thing, so I probably shouldn't listen to what she says.

I have a therapist, but not a gender therapist. 
How old do you have to be to start hormones?

From what I understand a therapist who isn't a gender therapist can still write you a letter. I didn't start until 19 so I don't have personal experience but I hear some doctors won't want to start you until 18 just because of the liability or whatever but I hear some cases of people starting at 16.

Quote from: Andrew Scott on January 19, 2011, 12:11:17 PM
From what I understand a therapist who isn't a gender therapist can still write you a letter. I didn't start until 19 so I don't have personal experience but I hear some doctors won't want to start you until 18 just because of the liability or whatever but I hear some cases of people starting at 16.

Really? O:

Well, that works out for me, 'cause I told my therapist that I really want to start hormones and I've been telling her about my trans-feelings and whatnot, and I'm turning 16 soon. So, hopefully I can start sooner than I expected (which was 18+). c: Maybe?

Do you really like this 'friend'? It sounds to me like she's not so much a proper friend as a source of irritation and pain to you. Can I ask why you still see her? I'm genuinely curious. If a friend of mine treated me like that, I'd give them the elbow.

You liked your hair before right? Dont listen to what she says...if she doesn't accept you thats her problem...and it sounds like she is just trying to make you miserable right now. I'm sure your hair looks good. Some people say my hair looks kinda "girly"...but its more scene/emo. Besides.....I could care less what they think. I like my hair...and thats what matters.

The reason they say my hair looks girly is because I spike it out in the back...but wtf...guys do that too.

This is what my hair looks like...I will post a picture..[its not me..but its what my hair is like..well now that it grew out a bit...my bangs are about that length now].





^^ Its kind of like that. But people still tell me its girly. I just say eff them. Do what you want. I'm sure your hair doesn't look girly.

Gilmorton: I've known her for years, and I'm stuck around her a lot because I'm really close with her sister (who, interestingly enough, is 100% supportive of me and they argue about my being-a-boy situation when it pops up. It's kind of awkward.) And they're twins, and they're the kind of twins that are always around each other even if they don't want to be. So, it's kind of like, if I hang out with one, I have been hang around the other.

Alex201: Very good point.

I used to have longer hair, shoulder length or so. I had a hard time passing so I decided to go ahead and cut most of it off. I cut it pretty short for what I'm used to and now everyone calls me a girl -.- I don't understand how that happens. I'm growing my hair back out. I like it better that way All that matters is what look you like.

Quote from: aLexBanonymous on January 19, 2011, 06:20:20 PM
I used to have longer hair, shoulder length or so. I had a hard time passing so I decided to go ahead and cut most of it off. I cut it pretty short for what I'm used to and now everyone calls me a girl -.- I don't understand how that happens. I'm growing my hair back out. I like it better that way All that matters is what look you like.

I'd take "girl" over "dyke" or "butch lesbian" any day.  My parents are fond of saying I look like a dyke/butch lesbian, or they were up until recently when I was able to see them in person and I told them to knock it off.

Anyway...

Devyn, it sounds like she enjoys giving you a hard time.  Just smile and act pleasantly around her, even when she makes those comments.  It's kind of fun because then it makes them upset because they're not making you upset.

It's your hair, and if you like it, that's all that matters.

Quote from: LukasGabriel on January 19, 2011, 06:28:06 PM
I'd take "girl" over "dyke" or "butch lesbian" any day.  My parents are fond of saying I look like a dyke/butch lesbian, or they were up until recently when I was able to see them in person and I told them to knock it off.

I've had many people think I'm a lesbian and had a few hit on me but unfortunately I'm not attracted to girls ha. But I'm too... girly... to be considered butch. Even if I hate saying that.

Quote from: aLexBanonymous on January 19, 2011, 06:35:55 PM
I've had many people think I'm a lesbian and had a few hit on me but unfortunately I'm not attracted to girls ha. But I'm too... girly... to be considered butch. Even if I hate saying that.

>> I'm very girly. XD  But it doesn't stop the rude comments.  >> I wish I had girls hitting on me, haha. xD

Quote from: LukasGabriel on January 19, 2011, 06:43:32 PM
>> I'm very girly. XD  But it doesn't stop the rude comments.  >> I wish I had girls hitting on me, haha. xD

Aww I want da gay boys to hit on me but I don't tend to get that -.-

Quote from: aLexBanonymous on January 19, 2011, 06:45:05 PM
Aww I want da gay boys to hit on me but I don't tend to get that -.-

I hear you.  When my sexuality tended towards guys (gay), I was out of luck--still would be, given how I look.  Now that my sexuality tends towards girls, I'm still out of luck.  -.-  Stupid looking like a girl getting in the way.

Always seems like it always works out that way... attracting the wrong gender and all. Go figure.

After I came out I got a short back and sides haircut thinking it would help me pass but I still didn't pass at all so I grew it out and when it was kind of emo length I passed about 90% of the time till i spoke  Now it's longer I pass less but more then I did when I had short hair.

Hurray for emo cuts letting us pass!

Quote from: Devyn on January 19, 2011, 01:27:58 PM
Gilmorton: I've known her for years, and I'm stuck around her a lot because I'm really close with her sister (who, interestingly enough, is 100% supportive of me and they argue about my being-a-boy situation when it pops up. It's kind of awkward.) And they're twins, and they're the kind of twins that are always around each other even if they don't want to be. So, it's kind of like, if I hang out with one, I have been hang around the other.

Is there any way you can just see her sister?  Or even talk to her over the phone or something.  This 'friend' of yours doesn't sound like much of a friend at all.

Also, have you tried cutting your own hair?  Your parents might not like it if they forced you to get a girl cut, but once the hair is off it's off.  Plus it sounds like you are very sure of what you want, and the sooner you can make them accept/tolerate it the better.

The beauty of getting a bad haircut is...
Given time, it'll grow out again, and you can try a different haircut.

"short" hair doesn't go well on most FTMs because it makes them look like butch lesbians, or masculine women. I've always looked a bit like a "feminine male" when my hair is long, so I should have known better than cut it so short but I did, I cut my hair really short just.. two years ago? I think? (took an electric trimmer and ran it over my head 'till there was just "fuzzy" left) Anyways. I haven't cut it since and it's down, just past my shoulders by now.
Given time, this too shall pass.

And you're already on the path towards what you want. Given time, you'll get there too.
I know that waiting is the hardest part. There's research showing, proving, that the standing 'round in limbo, just waiting to be allowed forwards, is hell on a human being, but.. there's still reason why they hold us back, make us have to take our time.

There are those, though few and far between, that want this for the wrong reasons, and by stalling, they are trying to prevent people from doing things they'll never be able to un-do, that they'll regret.
Try and see it that way, that they can't possibly feel someone else's emotions, that they can't possibly feel what you're feeling, and that they aren't trying to make it worse, they're trying to help, if anything. It can help you have a little bit of patience with them, even if the process may not be much easier for it. Every little bit helps.