i have not been harmed but i have this firend who is gay and i asked him want he felt about MTF he when into a rage saying how much he dislike them and anyone who would date come i was shocked then he calmed down and looked at me and asked why?... just no reason... * i tought he would have been more torable D: * just wondering are there alot of people like that? i have been look up on the internet posts about how people feel towards MTF and FTM people. im confused its kind of scared to start my Therapy. is it likey i would be harm or even killed for it? i life in northren ireland sorry if any of it is spelled wrong but im kind of confused at this time.

I belive it's just because people is afraid to changes so drastic such a gender change
and as for your friend, maybe he's returning somehow the way he has been treated in the past

There are many people who are very unaccepting of the trans community just as there are many people who are anti gay and even racist. There are a lot of people who are also very accepting of transgendered too. There's always going to be someone who is going to be unaccepting no matter what. One thing I've noticed oddly enough is that there is a lot of people who are anti trans in the LGB community which I would think would be otherwise, but hey, what are you going to do.

I don't care how much of the world is against trans.  I can't remain male.  I just can't.  If I'm the subject of violence, than it least I will die for something worth dying for.  I fear remaining male much more than I fear a few punks with a superiority complex.

thanks for your postsa so far just need to say another thingthe place where i live seems very unaccepting of the trans community should i move or risk it? i know that meant be seen as running way from the people know and support me and the people who dont. i know everyone reactionion is not the same but im just scared of geting harmed or beaten up.

One of my good friends, a very nice lady called Xaria, went through her transition whilst living in Derry. I know from her it's not the most tolerant part of the world, but believe me, if you behave sensibly and avoid known trouble spots, don't go flaunting yourself or bothering too many people in bars or other places where trouble is known to flare anyway, you are no more likely be killed for doing this than because someone takes a dislike to the colour of your socks!

Seriously, intolerance is out there, but believe me it was a million times worse when I was being treated in the late 1970's and early 80's and I, and many more like me survived simply by keeping our heads down. These days you have legal protections so unless you do something terminally stupid then you will be fine.

Just a slightly different perspective.

As you know, gay people are not transgendered. In another thread, Cindy cites Ian McKellen when asked about straight people not understanding gays, replied he had never understood straight people.

But that isn't the point I want to make.

When I went into nursing, I really hoped that the opportunity to transision would present itself. To be honest, before I joined Susans' i didn't know very much about it, though I thought I did. But I still hoped that there would be an opportunity in nurseing.

Now, anyone who is a nurse will tell you, that nurses are not the most tolerant of people. It's a team job and loose cogs just get in the way. I never tried.

I suppose, partly to push the whole thing out of my mind but it also has to be said, I was reciting many of the notions that others did, I adopted a very negative approach to all deviancy. Since I was training in psychiatry, I looked at the whole thing using a psychiatric model. I became very negative and develeoped some rather unflattering theories.

It was around that time I was offered help with transision, quite out the blue, by a Dr I'd known since I was 14. I reacted very negatively, launching into a rant where I recited all of my theories as if I was lecturing some newbie. (This Dr was in her 70s at the time)

After, when I'd thought about it, I realised how silly I'd been on so many levels.

But the point is, sometimes, when people react so strongly, it may be that they just don't understand. But equally, there is an old addage that certainly applied to me.

The lady doth protest too much, Me thinks !

(Put in bold for my benefit. I sometimes need a kick in the face).

In a way, I think being transgender is a bit like being "the new gay" (I hope I'm not going to get flamed for this).
Back in the 70s and 80s and before, people were A LOT less tolerant/enlightened than they are now. Most people these days genuinely could not care less about your sexuality. The same people 30, 40 years ago would have condemned you for it, purely because of ignorance on the matter.

I'm noticing an increasing trend towards people being more educated about transgender and transsexual folk these days, to the point where, when I offered to buy my mum a book that would explain more about things for me, she said she didn't need to because she'd seen it all on TV! But it's a bit like gay people 30 years ago; there's still a lot of ignorance to dispel before most folk are truly ok with it. I hope I put that more clearly than it feels like I did!

The other thing is that a lot of people used to rant about how abnormal gay people were until they found out that their friend/brother/daughter/boss was gay and then they'd think "Oh, but so-and-so is such a nice guy and not bad or evil or perverted at all. I'd better rethink this." And I think the more people discover that their friends, co-workers, siblings and parents are trans, the easier it will get. You may find your friend becomes more tolerant when you do eventually come out. I hope so, anyway.

Gil