So I have no idea if this is the appropriate area to post this, but we'll see.

I've recently started talking to a woman online who is a self-proclaimed mega-feminist. In one of the conversations, I used the word "female" and she said she got extremely offended because of it. I was confused because I wasn't using it in a derogatory way, I was just using it as a distinction between the sexes. I've asked her why it was offensive, but all she told me is that I'm in dire need of taking a women's studies course. Since that isn't currently available to me, I figured I'd turn to the lovely and intelligent people here at Susan's. Any idea on why that would irk her so badly?

Wait.... let me get this straight. You called a feminist woman a female and she was offended? 

Yes! Yet she was fine with me saying woman instead. Do you see why I'm confused?

And actually, I wasn't even referring to her as female. So I'm even more stumped as to why she got so offended.

B/c female is written with the word male in it .... in the feminist movement there is a strong push against anything that links women to men ... like a woman is part of a man.  That's why you see them spelling women .... womyn...don't know for sure if that is why she was offended but I would imagine it is

Man I couldn't stop laughing when I read your reply because it's sounds like your as confused as I would be. But Rob sounds like he has it right. Although what do you use instead of female? I guess I don't get it as long as no one calls me "it" words don't bother me but it does make me curious because I don't want to potentially offend anyone.

That makes sense. I was just startled because I wasn't expecting her to get so mad. O.o

I'm fine with anything but "it" as well...I guess I just have a way different view than her...

That's funny, in a strange way of course...

I actually think she should be more offended when someone says woman than female (Something like Woman, make me a sandwhich sounds much wose than the opposite).

People these days!

I think Rob nailed it,

Many militant feminist take objection to anything with male or man in it. Womyn like that cannot wear man-made fibre clothes , or sit in a committee  with a chairman, their  OK receiving mail, but if you ask them if they have had any good mail recently be prepared for a blast . They are OK with things made in China but stuff made in Manilla can be a problem.

I had a student with this attitude and although I can appreciate her desires it gets to a point of being ridiculous.

Cindy

Quote from: CindyJames on February 08, 2011, 01:45:29 AM
They are OK with things made in China but stuff made in Manilla can be a problem.

Never heard that one

But true, it's most likely that kind of discourse. Bit over the top IMHO, but who am I to judge

Love,
Emma

Did you call her "a female"? Or talk about "females" when you meant "women and girls"? If so, that is offensive.

Women and girls are people. "Females" are livestock. Or hardware.

This is ridiculous. I mean she was a ->-bleeped-<- for not explaining things. I hate that "you should know why I am upset so I am not going to tell you". Makes me so angry. Sorry, ghosts of my past creeping in, I had this ex-girlfriend........

Woman is not much better as it has man in it. So I am confused   

Perhaps it was more to do with the context...

I don't remember exactly what I said now, but I said something about the "female population". I didn't say anything offensive about girls, I was just saying it to seperate them from boys, since what I said didn't apply to them.

Ugh, I hate feminists, so uptight.

You'd expect them to be bigger fans of mtf's sadly that is not the case

^ way to paint an entire movement with broad strokes. You hate equal rights too?

If there was no other context to this there's no understanding to be known unless she explains. It's. Just. Odd.

Quote from: Rob on February 03, 2011, 08:03:59 AM
B/c female is written with the word male in it .... in the feminist movement there is a strong push against anything that links women to men ... like a woman is part of a man.  That's why you see them spelling women .... womyn...don't know for sure if that is why she was offended but I would imagine it is

It must be horrible to have to live a life of man hating. She doesn't want anything male associated with her at all yet her father is a male. Without a male she would not even exist.

I'm confused too. I tought for the last 30 years that my gender was female but no I've noticed that I can be offended by someone calling me female.
strange...strange
I don't get it.
Maybe she is a bit oversensed.

hug
annette

If your position is so contrived that you have to take a course to even get "offended" by something, you should probably reevaluate your position. Why do they call "man hating", womens studies anyways?   

Interesting.  I realize that different words are offensive to different people, but I have to say...this one comes across as a bit silly to me.  It reminded me of some show (I can't remember which one) where a woman joins a feminist book club.  She says "I'll set this down by the ottoman.  Oh sorry, ottowoman." 

QuoteDid you call her "a female"? Or talk about "females" when you meant "women and girls"? If so, that is offensive.

Women and girls are people. "Females" are livestock. Or hardware.

That's likely it. I personally do use the word female to describe my body, however, I am a women's studies major and this is a very common argument amongst others in my classes.

I think female is only derogatory when it's used as a noun (the defining term), instead of an adjective (to describe one quality amongst others). I feel the same way about "The Homeless" as compared to "homeless people". But that woman definitely overreacted, and telling you in response to your "Why?" that you should RTFM is just insulting.