Quote from: lucaluca on February 10, 2011, 02:03:42 PM
hey, great answer! exactly what i am thinking of!
but the problem is the society. if you decide that the clothes are a part of you, it is not that easy to go outside
how do one deals with this?
To present as yourself and to present as the opposite gender are and are not mutually exclusive. There are many males who wear clothing of the opposite gender because it is a style or because they are attempting to make a statement; tight skinny jeans, for example, are somewhat common among males even though they are meant for females, yet those individuals, who wear them, are accepted in society. A crossdresser is attempting to portray her/himself as the opposite sex, which if s/he's image does not conform to the image society has setup, that individual is not easily embraced by society; in many cases, that individual is shunned, ridiculed, and even persecuted for violating social norms.
How does a crossdresser who has embraced the opposite gender's style of clothing, as their own, go out in public and wear that clothing s/he associates her/his self-image with?In my late teens and early twenty's, a leader in my life, at the time, taught me that an individual's image was significant when attempting to represent something. Others, and society, label and judge you instantly upon your attire—your appearance. If you want people, society, to see you for what you represent (yourself, in this case), you need to appear the part.
How does this translate into crossdressing? Like wearing any other attire, there is a time and place for certain styles. For example, you don't wear an ultra-miniskirt, super low-cut top, and a heavy load of makeup to a funeral. You wear clothing styles that present you at your best for the appropriate event. Most importantly, you keep yourself groomed and clean, which means shaven legs if you are wearing a dress. Sometimes it takes trial and error to get the style that works for you, but the closer you match your body to a style that positively accentuates it, the less likely you are going to get heavy weird looks; that isn't to say that you will not be looked at by people. If your overall appearance does not conform to the range of which is expected for the gender you are portraying, you may still be subjected to stares, whispers, and negative comments.
Even if your appearance as the opposite gender is flawless, it will be your personality that will be a deciding factor as how people will view and treat you when you are dressed. There have been many ugly cis-gender individuals who have captured the hearts of the beautiful because of their personality. An individual's personality is an inner light that can radiate warmth, love, happiness, and many other positive attributes; attributes humans tend to yearn. Most societies shun those who threaten versus those who radiate the positive.
How does a crossdresser who has embraced the opposite gender's style of clothing, as their own, go out in public and wear that clothing s/he associates her/his self-image with?By wearing clothing that brings out the best physical features that conform to range of the opposite gender; by keeping clean and groomed; by having and cultivating a personality that radiates warmth, happiness, and positivity; and—most importantly—by being courageous in being true to yourself without concerning yourself what others may think.
Hope that answers your question.