Well, for lack of a better word.

Anyway, there's a possibility that I am moving to another state this summer, which means I would also be going to a different school with different people.

And if I do move, I really don't want have to go through the "Hey, can you call me Devyn and by male pronouns?" situation with everybody I meet AGAIN, mostly because it either freaks people out, they talk about me behind my back, or they don't take me seriously.

My friends currently don't know how to do that for me and still mostly call me by female pronouns and by my really girly female name because they're all asses.

However, my only problem is that my mom stalks me on susans, but neither of us has said anything to each other about it and she always calls me a girl or her daughter way too much and whatnot. So, basically, she knows but I'm not out to her, if that makes sense. XD

So, I mean, if I do move, I could drive to my new school before the first day, and talk to the office about my transgender-status. But what if they don't agree to what I'm asking? What if they're all, "Nononono, you're a girl. We cannot call you this or by male pronouns. Your teachers can't do that...."

Then I'm screwed, I guess, because I'll be outed the moment I ask somebody to call me by a different name and different pronouns.

I don't know. I'm just trying to figure this all out before it actually happens - if it happens.

Devyn,
You don't mention the state to which you're moving, and that makes a huge difference.  I also know how hard it is to "break in" a new group of friends/teachers/etc..  I think that in certain regions or school districts it might be safer to do things on a case-by-case basis, and in others you might have a very supportive administration/set of teachers who will work with you.  If you don't want to post more info publicly, feel free to PM me about where you're headed and I can see if I can offer more concrete advice. 

Quote from: EliNewGuy on February 19, 2011, 12:48:37 PM
Devyn,
You don't mention the state to which you're moving, and that makes a huge difference.  I also know how hard it is to "break in" a new group of friends/teachers/etc..  I think that in certain regions or school districts it might be safer to do things on a case-by-case basis, and in others you might have a very supportive administration/set of teachers who will work with you.  If you don't want to post more info publicly, feel free to PM me about where you're headed and I can see if I can offer more concrete advice.

WV.

(Just forgot to add the state. My bad.)

I'd suggest calling the school as soon as you find out where you are headed. Find out the teachers emails and email them before classes start or go in early to talk to them. My last 3 years of high school my teachers never called me by my birthname and they avoided pronouns unless I specifically said use male pronouns. Not every teacher was great at it but I kinda pulled an Adam from Degrassi and when the teacher yelled out the wrong name I ignored them until they got it right. Substitutes well I just made a point of pointing to my name on the roll sheet and saying this is me so yes I'm here but this is what people call me.

Good luck with everything man. I've read a few of your posts about school lately and this sounds like it would be a great thing for you so I hope it works out for you.

kinda off topic but welcome to WV 

Any chance you can legally change your name before you start school?  That should make things significantly easier, as your teachers likely won't actually see your official gender marker, and will just see the name on the roll sheet.  If your name is legally changed and you pass as male most of the time, then you shouldn't have too much of a problem.

And trying to get a school to recognize your chosen name without your mother's support would likely be pretty difficult.  Individual teachers may be a different matter, but unless it's a pretty progressive school, the institution as a whole may likely be fairly resistant, especially without your mother's backing.  Of course, as a minor you would need her approval to change your name legally, too.  Maybe this is a good time to actually talk to her about all this?

Your mom reads this place hmm?  Hey Devyn's mom, how's it going?  Your SON is pretty cool.

Anyway I'd recommend doing what Andrew Scott said.  If you can't email your teachers for whatever reason, try to talk to them outside of class when you first get there, before your girl name and pronouns have a chance to sink in with everyone.

Quote from: Liam K on February 19, 2011, 08:22:39 PM
Any chance you can legally change your name before you start school?  That should make things significantly easier, as your teachers likely won't actually see your official gender marker, and will just see the name on the roll sheet.  If your name is legally changed and you pass as male most of the time, then you shouldn't have too much of a problem.

And trying to get a school to recognize your chosen name without your mother's support would likely be pretty difficult.  Individual teachers may be a different matter, but unless it's a pretty progressive school, the institution as a whole may likely be fairly resistant, especially without your mother's backing.  Of course, as a minor you would need her approval to change your name legally, too.  Maybe this is a good time to actually talk to her about all this?

Pretty much everybody who doesn't know my female name or used to know me when I presented as female assumes I'm a guy - so basically, I pass a good majority of the time. My voice doesn't really change that, for some reason (which I think it normally would, since it's not that deep.)

Anyway, there's no way my mom would let me legally change my name while I'm still a minor.  She named me my female name and she wants it to stay that way. And I want to talk to my mom about the whole trans thing, I just get nervous. But I guess if I want her to back me up, I need to actually talk to her. I'll do it eventually.

Quote from: Sylvester on February 19, 2011, 08:23:27 PM
Your mom reads this place hmm?  Hey Devyn's mom, how's it going?  Your SON is pretty cool.

Anyway I'd recommend doing what Andrew Scott said.  If you can't email your teachers for whatever reason, try to talk to them outside of class when you first get there, before your girl name and pronouns have a chance to sink in with everyone.

That made me laugh, for some reason. XD I once made a topic on here when I was freaking out that I found out my mom was looking at my stuff on here, and pretty much EVERYBODY said hi to my mom. Haha.

If I move and know what school I'm going to (which I probably will, since I know what county my mom wants to move to), I'll try emailing my teachers. That's a pretty good idea, so I don't have to tell each of them the first day.