Hey everyone, my name's Liam. I've posted a couple times around the site, and I'm really enjoying these forums! I just thought I'd properly introduce myself for anyone interested, and I'll give a little background information on myself too.
For the last 4 years or so; maybe more, I've identified as GenderQueer. But, I still kind of figured I had to get used to my female-body, and so I really ended up without a lot of body dysphoria. This probably led me to take a while longer in really closely examining my gender identity, but I think it also paved the way for me to be able to reflect on the times where my body didn't fit the situations as I saw them. Anyways, about 2 years ago or so I came out as Lesbian (having previously come out as Bisexual at 11 [and again at 14]) and I met my wonderful partner a little over a year ago. I told her when we first started dating that I identified as genderqueer, and I think she understood it about me. We bought a house together in November, and in early January a situation came up.
I had been to a workshop run by my university, and had disclosed to the group my gender identity, and it ended up being that they were so unexpectedly supportive that it made me cry a little. Laughing about it that night, I was telling my partner the story of it; when she got this look on her face, and it was like a lightbulb turning on - she hadn't associated me as being genderqueer for some time - even though she recalled I had identified as such.
So, in typical fashion for her - she went to 3 different libraries and ended up with about 15 books to varying degrees of relevancy. And then the questions began! Which was fabulous, honestly! But it really caused me to examine myself in a way I had never been forced to before. And after a few weeks of discussing (and I mean every single day, for at least 4 hours) I understood myself as a transman. She has been very supportive, but it's been difficult for our relationship at points. At this stage of the game, we have come to acknowledge that my old self has left so that my 'new' self could be heard, and so we've actually staged a breakup between her and 'Val', and recognized a new relationship forming between Liam and her! This has been really exciting for me, that she would want to do this.
Also, my parents have been phenomenally supportive, with my mom even calling my aunts and uncles individually to tell them firsthand that they now have a nephew named Liam - she didn't want family gossip sending the wrong message. Which has been so sweet of her to do that for me!
Last night, my partner and I went and spoke to another transman and his partner! It was so much fun, and he is tonnes like me - and he also gave me a recommendation to his doctor, because in Ontario it's pretty difficult to get testosterone treatment if you're not living in Toronto - but he said his doctor will practice by informed consent. (Also, just in case you're worried I'm rushing - I've been seeing a counsellor through my university for some time now, and although not a gender specialist, has at least been monitoring my mental health to make sure I'm okay with these changes in stress levels and so on, along with providing counseling about my relationship, too!)
I have come out to my profs, classmates, friends and family now as Liam, and I'm looking forward to the next stages of my transition!
