I was at the grocery store tonight and had to buy some phyllo dough for a recipe. The very nice older lady in line behind me asked what I was going to make with it. I told her and she gave me some tips on working with the dough. I was feeling good chatting with this nice lady then her final comment was "it unusual to see a man who knows what phyllo dough is." I wanted to scream out that I'm not a man but just smiled and thought about crawling into the freezer section and freezing to death next to the frozen turkeys.

I live in a rather backwater kind of town and I'm in guy mode and not trying to pass so I shouldn't expect people to see me any different. In fact, I expect them to see me as gay if anything but it still hurts when that exact comment would not be made to woman and I just drives the dysphoria home.

What do you find worse than being sir'd? What are the things that drive the dysphoria home for you?

"You have a lucky (girl friend) (spouse).  Do you want a gift receipt?"  (Without makeup on, but femme top and slacks).

"Are you sure the shoulders on that are wide enough." (With makeup and hair piece.)

I don't mind getting "sir...I mean m'am!" it's the "m'am...I mean sir!" that really hurts.

Whenever anyone calls me sir, man, he, him or even dude I get this urge to just sock them up side their fool head

I don't, of coarse I hold that urge down, but I sure do feel and see it within me 

What really bothers me is when I get sir'd by a jerk who would have otherwise had no idea until he was required to see my ID. Luckily that shouldn't be the case for too much longer.

I liked your analogy... I could see myself doing that. It was kinda funny...I am transitioning on the job where people knew my history  from before   ..which when you transition is something hard to avoid...Some people think it is there responsibility to let new people now where i came from...Needlessly to say the relationship changes when somebody opens there big mouth..It hurts really bad when that happens.  I just want to scream!! I dream of the day when I can avoid that..

i've gotten more than enough of it from the first 17 years i went around looking mostly male. it's so disrespectful, and i can't stand it. especially jerks in my family that keep reminding me how tall i am. i don't talk to any of them, so they can just shut it. i'm not sure if they're overwhelmed by my height, because they think i'm not really 18.

No words spoken today while getting a manicure, just inquisitive looks from one rather attractive young woman at the nail salon.  Apparently, she was trying to figure out if I had moobs or breasts.  I wish she had just come over and said "Hi!", but that didn't happen. (I identify as lesbian, in case nobody knows it.)

I really don't feel too strongly about hearing "sir" after so many years of it.  Even if I'm wearing makeup and completely feminine clothing.  As rude and inconsiderate as are most people these days, I'm pleasantly surprised when anyone goes to the trouble to be courteous, at all.

Quote from: Vicky on March 02, 2011, 06:56:05 PM
"You have a lucky (girl friend) (spouse).  Do you want a gift receipt?"  (Without makeup on, but femme top and slacks).

"Are you sure the shoulders on that are wide enough." (With makeup and hair piece.)

just ask her when the baby's due, and remind her she's gonna lose that figure if she doesn't stop eating the twinkies