I have a suspicion this "girl" in my class is ftm, and I've gotten that feeling about other people too, but I may be wrong. Do other people think they can tell too?

People think they can but really they can't, or it's based on effed up cissexist ideas.

I definitely have met trans people where other people in my group have no clue.

I think that it's one of those things that regular people don't expect.  They can only spot the Jerry Springer types where other trans people might be looking for the transyness in everyone.

Mine's very accurate. Then again I live in a place where I meet other MTF/FTM peeps weekly. Let's just say I'm not living in Kansas. So yeah, I have a pretty accurate "->-bleeped-<-dar" for lack of a better term. 

I actually met another MTF the other day, and my cis-female friend had no clue.

I haven't picked anyone out myself, but when I came out a couple of my (gay) friends were just like, "yeah, we know."

Well, I'm somewhat positive that this 1 chick who's an interpreter for a deaf kid in some of my classes is an mtf, and I've had a substitute bus driver and a class ring dealer who I was somewhat positive were ftm's.

Now I had this 1 substitute teacher who I knew was an mtf . Poor thing didn't pass at all, although she did have a very convincing voice.

Also I saw a bus full of kathoey when I was at an airport in Las Vegas, a lot of them didn't pass very well either, but I guess you could say they were pretty.

I think it's more that most people don't expect to see any trans people, so they don't look for it. We do.

I'd like to think my ->-bleeped-<-dar is pretty good. My gaydar is near flawless! I still think we should come up with some secret phrase or handshake... I mean, you don't want to out someone who is stealth, and it's rude to just ask someone (especially if they aren't), but sometimes you feel the urge to be like "You're trans? I'm trans!!!" Or gay, if that is the case.

lol yeah, that 1 sub I wanted to ask her if she was trans and show support but that would have been soo rude >.>

I guess it really doesn't matter, only to know that you actually aren't doing this alone, other people actually are like you and you can become someone great.

No one can tell if a person is trans or not unless they are in the beginning stages and even then it's not always possible.    First, cis people can have hormone problems that causes them to have features of the opposite sex, does that make them trans?  Why does it matter so much if this girl is FTM?  It would be very rude to ask her or anyone you think may be trans if they are?  Would you want someone you didn't know asking you if you were trans?  I mean yeah it's fine to wonder and I could understand why you would but does it really matter what their genitals may or may not look like or what their gender identity may or may not be? 

Quote from: Andy8715 on March 08, 2011, 10:43:10 PM
No one can tell if a person is trans or not unless they are in the beginning stages and even then it's not always possible.    First, cis people can have hormone problems that causes them to have features of the opposite sex, does that make them trans?  Why does it matter so much if this girl is FTM?  It would be very rude to ask her or anyone you think may be trans if they are?  Would you want someone you didn't know asking you if you were trans?  I mean yeah it's fine to wonder and I could understand why you would but does it really matter what their genitals may or may not look like or what their gender identity may or may not be?

Ok, first of all I would never ask ANYONE if they where transgender/transsexual. I was just commenting that I thought she might be. And I guess it really doesn't matter but everyone is human so excuse me for being curious.

As I like to say "my gaydar is so broken I can't even tell if I'm gay!" and insuspect my ->-bleeped-<-dar is also broken to. Which sucks because I'd like to meet up with "fambily" here.

I work with a gay guy, and i know that his gaydar has gone off with me.... i've seen the looks from him, but he can't quite figure it out.... and i'm not telling 

I think that us gender variant folks may be more attuned to people that are also gender variant.

"->-bleeped-<-dar"? I don't mean to be a bug, but that term is rather bothersome to me

Quote from: Virginia Marie on March 09, 2011, 12:06:46 AM
"->-bleeped-<-dar"? I don't mean to be a bug, but that term is rather bothersome to me

Seconded.
With that said, my good friend, who is trans himself, is really good at picking out other trans people. I came out to him and he was all "yep. called it from a mile away."

Quote from: Virginia Marie on March 09, 2011, 12:06:46 AM
"->-bleeped-<-dar"? I don't mean to be a bug, but that term is rather bothersome to me

I personally use that first word to describe myself but I do understand why it would be bothersome.


I see people often who look like they might be starting transition but I'm in a city full of some feminine men and some incredibly masculine women. I do understand how you might want to feel like your not the only trans person around. Emoboi do you have a glbt group you could go to?

Personally, I find ->-bleeped-<- and queer offensive. ->-bleeped-<-, I don't mind.

If you don't find ->-bleeped-<- offensive, please read this:

http://nodesignation.com/?p=187

Especially if you're a trans guy or female-assigned at birth genderqueer, etc. I don't say that because I have any problem with you guys, but because their experience with the word is, for various cultural and historical reasons, probably a lot less likely to imbue it with anywhere near the same viscerally painful connotations as it often does for trans women.

But whatever your gender, sex, or identity, it's not enough to say "I don't find it offensive." So what if you don't? Do you speak for all people to whom that term might, from time to time, be applied? I'm not saying that you can't use it. But if you want to, I am asking that you take responsibility for how it might affect others.

Trista, I don't find queer offensive. I'm queer. I have lots of queer friends. I think queer folk are the best kind. I use it, and will continue to use it, because it's really useful to me: Sometimes being trans and being a lesbian are closely related issues, because of how they set me apart from the mainstream. Sometimes I fell that calling myself a lesbian puts too strong an emphasis on gender, whereas calling myself queer just means that I don't care who the mainstream thinks I should love, and lets me just have my own tastes.

But I recognize that some people have a different experience, and I know there are many ways in which it hurts. Please read that blog post, and tell me what you think about it, and why you have a problem with it -- because that will help me be more sensitive. Of course, you don't have to tell me; I'm just asking.

For the record, I think "->-bleeped-<-dar" is sufficiently silly and sardonic that it falls within the category of "repurposing" that the author describes at the end of the article. I'm perfectly happy to use it and to hear other people use it, because I think it shines a light on the problematic nature of the whole concept it describes.

My gay/->-bleeped-<-dar is operating fine.  In fact awhile back, Lacey Lynne and I were at the mall.  The guy, who rang up our purchase, was definitely.  I told Lacey this as we left.  And she said "How do you know?".  My response was "Gaydar".