When I was a kid, I loved being feminine and wearing feminine clothes. I couldn't wait to grow up and be a beautiful woman. But, I didn't feel female. I also didn't feel male. And I still had other signs of being transsexual. There was one year that I can remember where I wanted to be a boy, but for some reason I continued to willingly dress and act feminine. Were any of you that way as children?

I don't remember ever wanting to grow up to be a beautiful woman, but maybe I did.  I mostly wanted to be a ninja or a power ranger an army man or a spy.  The whole man or woman thing never crossed my mind until I was a little older and realized that when I pictured myself being those things, I was always a male.  I do remember picturing myself growing into a teenage girl who was on the phone every night with her friends (that's how TV protrayed teenage girls when I was little-- of course, by the time I was in middle school everyone had computers and the whole phone stereotype completely disappeared).  I just had trouble picturing myself growing past a teenager.  In  fact, in middle school art we had to draw pictures of ourselves at various ages and for everything past 20 I drew a headstone because I was convinced I was going to die before I became an adult since I had such a hard time picturing myself as an adult woman.  I'm surprised that never earned me a trip to the guidance counselor....

I also kept living as a girl even after I realised I wanted to be a boy. I dressed as masculine as I could, but never tried to look like a guy because I figured there was no point.

and as a kid I never showed signs either, although I was a bit of a tomboy. To be honest I'm afraid my therapist will tell me I can't transition because I'm not transgender, since there weren't many signs during early childhood :s

ever since I was a really little kid I honestly thought I was going to grow up to be a teenage boy and then a man - it wasn't until puberty that I realized things were not going as I had expected them to. I remember this creepy unsettling feeling whenever someone told me when I grew up I'd be female, like right before something bad happens in a horror movie...

But since we were all told that we were female and would grow up to women it makes sense that we would imagine our futures that way at some point in time.

I didn't grow up with any knowledge of trans men or the internet.

Just wanted to chime in because:

- I did not know I was trans at the age of 3-5
- I did not know I was trans at puberty
- I did not have any awareness or acceptance of my trans identity in a meaningful way prior to the age of 30

There were plenty of 'signs' yet every single one of those can be interpreted as though I was a girl or young woman who enjoyed stereotypically boyish hobbies and activities. Also, the older you get, the more your memories are really just a function of what you're choosing to believe, to hold onto, what other people have told you, etc.

I think people put WAY too much stock into meeting some classical narrative of what a transgender person is, and I think it's unfortunate, because it encourages people to lie or repeat these stories that they think therapists or others want to hear and to emphasize the parts of themselves (or their past) that they think "fits."

Be yourself. It doesn't matter what you did when you were 5 or 11. What matters is who you *are* now.

Quote from: Sean on April 01, 2011, 01:21:28 PMI think people put WAY too much stock into meeting some classical narrative of what a transgender person is, and I think it's unfortunate, because it encourages people to lie or repeat these stories that they think therapists or others want to hear and to emphasize the parts of themselves (or their past) that they think "fits."

Be yourself. It doesn't matter what you did when you were 5 or 11. What matters is who you *are* now.

Thank you.  I totally agree.  And I really hate it when people who know me look at me and don't think that I'm masculine enough to be a transguy.  I like the way you explained that.

Quote from: Sean on April 01, 2011, 01:21:28 PM
I didn't grow up with any knowledge of trans men or the internet.

Just wanted to chime in because:

- I did not know I was trans at the age of 3-5
- I did not know I was trans at puberty
- I did not have any awareness or acceptance of my trans identity in a meaningful way prior to the age of 30

There were plenty of 'signs' yet every single one of those can be interpreted as though I was a girl or young woman who enjoyed stereotypically boyish hobbies and activities. Also, the older you get, the more your memories are really just a function of what you're choosing to believe, to hold onto, what other people have told you, etc.

I think people put WAY too much stock into meeting some classical narrative of what a transgender person is, and I think it's unfortunate, because it encourages people to lie or repeat these stories that they think therapists or others want to hear and to emphasize the parts of themselves (or their past) that they think "fits."

Be yourself. It doesn't matter what you did when you were 5 or 11. What matters is who you *are* now.

Glad I am not the only one ... I am glad my therapist doesn't feel I have to follow a certain role or know at a young age...as a child I just pushed back against gender roles ... some called me strong willed...so said i was going to be a feminist...whatever the reason now that I have come to realize who I am I am a much happier person